Choosing to Stay

Status    Subject Created By Replies Views Last Post
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newPollBookmarkLockedFalling Do you kiss your spouse?
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Deleted 49 3,550 by apathetic
Oct 3, 2019 22:40:24 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Finding Happiness in a Celibate Life
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theexplorer 22 1,351 by solodriver
Sept 22, 2019 1:07:22 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Too good to leave, too bad to stay.
Rhapsodee 8 631 by theexplorer
Sept 3, 2019 17:00:31 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Staying
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lessingham 26 1,769 by tooyoungtobeold
Aug 26, 2019 14:27:51 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Been a while - UPDATE
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mrslowmaintenance 27 1,329 by h
Jul 30, 2019 21:33:55 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Playing the game
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2019change 20 1,154 by bballgirl
Jul 29, 2019 13:27:52 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Sometimes the stuff is not given.
lessingham 5 343 by lessingham
Jul 27, 2019 3:16:59 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling How to refuse without a backlash.
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eeman 18 1,061 by angeleyes65
Jul 15, 2019 16:20:51 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Implied Consent
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dallasgia 20 1,185 by ironhamster
Jul 9, 2019 3:03:56 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling My Changing View of Marriage and Love
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theexplorer 21 1,369 by greatcoastal
Jul 6, 2019 20:52:58 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Tell me my future
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Deleted 22 1,484 by snowman12345
Jun 16, 2019 17:17:21 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling What is good?
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cassiopeia92 24 1,162 by noregretz
Jun 9, 2019 16:13:37 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Indifference
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smith227 15 1,340 by northstarmom
May 28, 2019 21:11:49 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Some decisions
cassiopeia92 2 309 by cassiopeia92
May 23, 2019 8:30:10 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling My past and my future
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cassiopeia92 28 921 by worksforme2
May 23, 2019 7:45:09 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Staying and choosing to outsource.
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Rhapsodee 50 2,690 by angeleyes65
May 12, 2019 9:43:15 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling A useful read?
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lessingham 17 1,136 by elynne
Apr 18, 2019 1:56:54 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling The secret to “staying” successfully
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Dan 29 2,418 by firefollower
Mar 27, 2019 12:08:18 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Loneliness
smith227 14 503 by theexplorer
Mar 25, 2019 10:25:00 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Just a thought for today.
jim44444 3 418 by northstarmom
Mar 15, 2019 9:35:28 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Remind me again
smith227 4 597 by Handy
Feb 17, 2019 22:55:57 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling If your spouse agreed, would you even want to?
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rich 27 1,657 by jim44444
Feb 4, 2019 2:59:21 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling 22
lwoetin 0 388 by lwoetin
Feb 1, 2019 1:07:12 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Is a fresh start really possible?
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whynotm3 16 920 by saarinista
Jan 1, 2019 20:24:56 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Numb / Shutting Down
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whynotm3 37 1,771 by muzack
Dec 23, 2018 0:36:08 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling The stay or leave dichotomy
catsloveme 13 749 by whynotm3
Dec 21, 2018 21:21:03 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Staying, because we can forgive each other
lwoetin 11 477 by lwoetin
Dec 21, 2018 14:14:59 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Separate bedrooms?
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xfoo 37 1,721 by darktippedrose
Dec 18, 2018 15:52:37 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling Without sex and intimacy, is it a marriage?
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tooyoungtobeold 37 2,406 by h
Dec 10, 2018 10:44:30 GMT -5
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newBookmarkLockedFalling A little help from my friends
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workingonit 17 1,273 by misssunnybunny
Nov 24, 2018 11:30:12 GMT -5

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Choosing to Stay
Focusing on the challenges of staying in a sexless marriage. Share advice, pitfalls, successes, and setbacks.
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worksforme2: some better and some worse,..virus seems to be slowing down, but people are beginning to refuse to stay inside,...worst thing I see is Biden leading in the election poles,...but that could be fake news Apr 20, 2020 16:56:22 GMT -5
mirrororchid: Politics? Is that what we want to happen here? Apr 21, 2020 6:21:24 GMT -5
petrushka: Certainly not American style politics. Toxic echo chambers. Apr 23, 2020 16:21:52 GMT -5
petrushka: However, I feel that sexual politics, including political moves that impact the relationships between gender (misogynist, misandrist, etc) definitely deserve room in this context. Apr 23, 2020 16:22:59 GMT -5
fred: just calculated that i've spent somewhere near 19,000 days (& nights) as a "rejectee".AND that allows for 2,000+ days (& nights) on business travel apart from her. i've chosen to "stay" .....would never do that again, and can't as you see doing the math May 15, 2020 18:01:15 GMT -5
worksforme2: 19000 days and nights,....damn dude, that's 52 yrs. Jun 17, 2020 9:19:10 GMT -5
fred: you're a little short works - was thinking this AM, there has NEVER been a day when she indicated desire for me physically (other than for heavy lifting or finance)........LOL...........earlier, i had enough libido for both of us, now i'm left with guilt Jun 20, 2020 13:11:12 GMT -5
fred: over imposing myself on her rather than simply leaving .....DAMN LOVE ANYWAY ! Jun 20, 2020 13:12:12 GMT -5
mesulina: update everyone, still has not happened. I have now come to accept that I will live with out. It is just different now. Jun 29, 2020 19:32:31 GMT -5
worksforme2: Sorry mesulina,... but on the positive side you did stock up on toys a short time back,..now might be the time to go for the gusto Jun 30, 2020 17:42:54 GMT -5
grower: Embrace a change, you will wonder why you waited so long Jul 9, 2020 11:22:56 GMT -5
grower: Your life clock is ticking away, don't waste all your time. Live some. Jul 24, 2020 9:53:20 GMT -5
fred: blue guy, i was where you are 30 years ago. stayed.................nothing changed. if i didn't love this nice lady so much i'd be in deep regret. if she doesn't think of you in a hundred "other" ways (as does my wife) GET OUT ! Life is short Aug 10, 2020 17:43:15 GMT -5
mirrororchid: Episode 4 of *Refused*, ILIASM's unofficial podcast just released. drive.google.com/file/d/1wX41Xn1Z5fFKEQulCUjXFIECjXAiC7VF/view?usp=sharing Catch episodes 1-3 at the main thread: iliasm.org/thread/4855/podcasts Sept 9, 2020 18:07:38 GMT -5 *
jerri: Yuk on the plucking chicken feathers. If a chicken doesn't get sex and intimacy she just finds a beautiful cock sooner or later. I'd say there's a much higher "philandering" rate than anyone would care to admit. The rooster who is tormented findsa chicken! Sept 10, 2020 8:23:56 GMT -5
csl: And yet, there is an entire segment of ILIASM stayers. Sept 10, 2020 22:04:05 GMT -5
jerri: Exactly :) I have read multiple threads. I was very impressed with all the different solutions everyone has found. Intellectual group and the camaraderie is nice Sept 11, 2020 9:44:57 GMT -5
Handy: What happened to being light outside until 9:30 PM? It is 7:30 PM and dark now. :( Sept 20, 2020 20:46:01 GMT -5
jerri: It's not hot there? I am getting a slight break from the heat! Cheer up buddy! :) Sept 21, 2020 0:27:37 GMT -5
petrushka: Well WE are getting closer to summer. Just passed Equinox. I expect the solar panels will start paying for themselves again in the near future. (over the last few months they have merely mitigated the power bills). Sept 21, 2020 21:00:36 GMT -5