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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 7, 2017 0:10:12 GMT -5
I hear you loud and clear on the staying for the kids. I wouldn't be too hard on yourself. Given her enthusiastic efforts in the bedroom and the lead up of getting wasted i do not blame you for one bit on losing interest in the act. Stay Strong Brother Ironhamster.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 6, 2017 23:53:08 GMT -5
Seems you are married to a real prize. Sounds like a classic Narcissist. Probably witholding sex due to what he percieves as an unclean house. The real question is how long are you prepared to tolerate this behaviour?
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 6, 2017 23:45:32 GMT -5
So sorry to hear of your pain sister JMX. Eventually there will probably come a time when you will pull the trigger on your marriage. It really sounds like you are stuck with an immature man child with the sex drive of a 90 year old.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 2, 2017 0:26:52 GMT -5
Unfortunately Refusers seem to be quite a selfish lot. This selfishness extends to sharing their partners. They are quite prepared to let their partners go hungry but would not allow anyone else to feed them.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 2, 2017 0:23:06 GMT -5
Normal is what both partners are happy with. If both are mutually happy with 3 times a week that's normal. Same if it is once every 3 months again normal if both are mutually happy with the arrangement. However if one partner is not satisfied with the arrangement that's not normal.
For what its worth when i was engaged and newly married sex was on tap basically anytime no refusals. 14 years later how times have changed.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 2, 2017 0:14:02 GMT -5
I haven't had sex since I was 29. I'm currently 33. and the last time, I wasn't allowed to have an orgasm. He'd go through these times when he decided that its time for man only attention. And sometimes he decided that the female orgasm wasn't necessary for marital sex. In the beginning we had sex 3-4 x a week, I think. And after only a couple of years of that, he complained about it. He couldn't study like he wanted to (religious studies) and so forth. After he left for 5 months, when he came back we only had sex once a week. it was quite painful. I thought I was dying then. hahahaha then it was once every 2 weeks, 3 weeks, then once every 3-5 months. and then nothing. one year passed, two, three, four and now working on year 5. I completely feel sorry for you Sister darktippedrose. No person in their prime should ever have to endure years of sexlessness. Hope you are well on all other fronts.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Nov 1, 2017 22:18:28 GMT -5
Unfortunately your husband has beat you down again. Refusers do that they beat you up emotionally. Altough not ideal start to discreetly prepare the exit plan. You never know next time around you might be in a position to see it through despite your husbands best efforts at derailment.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 24, 2017 0:07:52 GMT -5
There could be many reasons for rejection. At the end of the day they all amount to the same thing. You ain't getting laid.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 23, 2017 23:36:51 GMT -5
I work with a bunch of dudes, I hear all about how their wives suck, so that is good. The single Guys talk about all the ass their getting which is good because I can live vicariously through them. I don't have to be at home where the second I'm there all responsibilities transfer to me and it is now my job to do everything while she watches TV plays in the tablet and naps. All wins, plus I get to chat with the occasional woman, that is a functional adult which is pretty promising for the future. I work out side, very labor intensive, so fresh air exercise, if I worked in an office or behind a desk I'd hate my life. Completely hear you brother aguywithneeds. My story is very similiar, except i work in an office.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 23, 2017 23:28:35 GMT -5
From past experiences letters do not work. There have been many examples on this site and the one before it. A letter will make you look weak and winey with no real resolution.
For what its worth i sympathise and agree with what your written in your letter. The question is how likely is it that your spouse will give a fu...ck? Im betting that it wont make a rats arse of a difference.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 17, 2017 0:19:54 GMT -5
Unfortunately it would seem you have some pretty hard decisions to make. Your November deadline is in 2 weeks. Have you visited a lawyer to find out where you stand? Have you got your exit strategy ready or will it take another 6 months to whack one into shape?
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 16, 2017 23:37:09 GMT -5
This question has been asked by hundreds here especially on the original Experience Project Forum where this group used to have a membership of over 50,000. General consesus was that its the Refuser that you need to lose.
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 16, 2017 23:31:15 GMT -5
My birthday was the 12, and per usual I don't expect anything. I waited, and waited, then after dinner I realized nothing was going to happen. So as I was going to bed(we don't sleep in the same room) I said good night I love you even though you're a jerk, she looked at me awkwardly, I said look at your phone, nothing, then I asked her the date, she said it, then light bulb, you forgot my birthday. I really wouldn't have cared but she's been talking about Christmas, our daughters bday which is in November, Halloween, and all this was in September. So I think to myself Halloween is more important to her than I am. I wonder if she'll ever understand that in like 4-5 years our youngest will be 8, the oldest gone and the middle driving, what then, does she expect me to continue to be the least important thing in her life. I was going to post a thread on this the other day and didn't get around to it,I'm glad you beat me to the punch. I have stopped all physical contact and pleads for intamacy, I tired of a simple conversation about how I don't think I should ask for sex every day and get a unenthusiastic quicky every month, turn into tears and how bad I am and if I did this or that, I'm not the problem. I'm young, in shape, my junk works, I'm handsome from what women tell me, it should be a no brainier, we have money, my income is 70 a year, big house, three cars, we eat good kids go to a good school, like a fucking dream, how many women would jump at the opportunity of that level of security. Instead I get nit picked, we'd have more sex but remember that one time 7 years ago when you said this, no I don't, because I was 25, I made mistakes and I've changed, and I feel like I did my time. Fuck this sucks. Bad thing is if she does change this period of time will always be here,and if she doesn't then it'll affect any future opportunities, ruining relationship for me. Relationships= pain and suffering. Been in your shoes brother aguywithneeds. Similiar story great job, comfortable life nice cars etc. Have you ever held her accountable for her actions?
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 16, 2017 22:40:12 GMT -5
What consequences have you imposed regarding your wifes foul behaviour?
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Post by Frustrated1978 on Oct 16, 2017 22:32:56 GMT -5
If you are horny and going through a dry spell take the reset sex on offer. However don't mistake it for anything more than it is.
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