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Post by tiredoftears on Feb 1, 2018 15:59:35 GMT -5
By the way, tiredoftears, last year I recall that you had some major issues with a) anger and b) a child who was being investigated by the medics. Any resolution to either? - an update would be good, sorry if I missed it. Thank you James. Unfortunately, no resolution. I am still in a sexless relationship, while everything else is fine, his failure to make attempts still upsets me, but I am over the seething anger, for now. As for our son, he had a CAT scan, but it was inconclusive, and they recommended more testing, however we are having insurance issues. He is on Medicaid, and the hospital is having issues processing the requests, or some weird shit like that. We have been waiting months now for his next appointment to be scheduled wo get another ultrasound to see how it has changed since his last one, and a biopsy, but there's nothing I can do to rush it along. The mass is still slowly growing, but at least it doesn't cause him any discomfort. Thank you for asking.
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Post by tiredoftears on Feb 1, 2018 1:09:23 GMT -5
Well, she gave you permission, bertie1471. Mine never did. But I will echo bballgirl and say be discreet. I will also add another piece of advise - be careful. You mentioned prostitutes. There are a lot of arguments good and bad for the professionals. But outside of health and legal concerns, here is my biggest problem with them: you are not a lover, but a customer. Some are very good at what they do. Some are wonderful actresses. And most are discreet. But it is not the same as a woman who finds you attractive for who you are. I need that acknowledgement even more than I need an orgasm. I used to be a sex worker, and loved my job, and loved any sex I ever had with a client. Sex was never a guarantee, I offered massage with a handjob ending, and I loved bringing pleasure and knowing I was the one in control of the situation, but certain clients I had sex with. It all depends on the worker. Never thought settling down with a client would end in a sexless relationship.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 31, 2018 20:38:03 GMT -5
Got a problem.....duh that's why I'm here. Not only is my problem a SM but I am now starting to question whether or not my W is a lazy ass POS. We've been sexless now for 7 years, the exact age of our daughter, go figure. I've gone through the list of reasons for our SM so not gonna go there but now it's on another level. The W works 3 days a week, that's 24 hours Mon, Tues, Wed. She has a 4 day weekend every week. (back story) Since the first day our daughter was taken to daycare when she was literally 7 months old...... the agreement we both made with each other as brand new parents was I would take her to daycare/school on Mondays and pick her up from daycare/school on Wednesdays. Leaving my W to take her on Tues, Wed, Thurs, and Fri as well as pick her up on those days EXCEPT Wed that's my day to get her. Remember the W only works M,T, W so you would think that taking her and picking her up on Thurs and Fri wouldn't be that big of a deal since oh yeah she isn't fucking working those days. Does anyone here have a spouse that they are questioning is lazy? My W doesn't do shit on her 4 days off. She may do some laundry but by the time I get home on those days it's still piled up in the basket waiting to be folded and put away. She has maybe vacuumed the floors maybe 5 times in the 15 years we've lived in our home. Don't start with me and sweeping the stairs. We have hard wood stairs and hard wood floors in the basement. I on purpose have not touched them with a broom in 6 months to see if she would eventually grow disgusted with the build up of dirt and dust......she hasn't batted an eye at them. We have a cat that is older than dirt that hacks up fur balls and pukes all over the place, in closets, under beds, in the kitchen.....she leaves it there.....walks right past it to go out to the screen deck to smoke her cigs every morning. The fucking liter box is the bane of my existence......I love animals but want this one to go away. She'll wash dishes and leave them in the sink for weeks on end and if the dish washer is full, she leaves them for weeks as well. She takes the trash bag out of the trash can and walks 3 feet, opens the back door and puts trash bags on the deck. Am I being to harsh...... Is she lazy if my description is on point? To me, this sounds more like severe depression. I used to keep am emaculate house and cook almlst every meal. Since our relationship became sexless, our house is filthy and i barely cook. I watch tv amd play with our son, but if it doesnt directly affect him, i dont care. We hang out in the living room all day, so I keep that room clean, but the rest of the house and the laundry I could not care less about. Honestly, just thinking about doing the housework now makes me feel on the verge of an anxiety attack. She sounds depressed amd She probably needs help amd is unable to ask.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 30, 2018 3:50:30 GMT -5
One of the things I've noticed on this forum is that the story is always in the nuance. The small little detail that becomes The Tell of what really happened. Or better maybe, the story that is underneath the story that the people are telling themselves. I've stood naked -- literally and figuratively -- on this forum. [....waits as all the new men start sifting through photos ....] It's only been a few weeks, but I've been supported, loved, challenged, and critiqued. Thank you for that. I want to talk about the original post on this thread. I might be wrong here because we only have one post from the original poster here. There is always an entire life that goes underneath the cry for help on an internet post, written mostly at night after the children sleep. When I told you my story, I wondered, "How do I tell twenty years of regret and longing and pain and good all in just a thousand words?" What do I tell? What do I leave out? What am I leaving out conveniently? It seems like it would take a thousand pages, and that still just would be the introduction. What I wanted to say about the original post is that I do not think Miss battlefairy has a domestic violence problem. That is a symptom, but it is not the problem. And she does not need to go to jail. Or go to court-- for that. We all may end up in a sexless marriage, but there are a thousand ways to get there. We did not all get there the same way. surfergirl, i just wanted it to be known that I felt the way you articulated this was beautiful, almost like poetry. Very well said, ma'am.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 29, 2018 12:50:32 GMT -5
You may be child of divorce, but right now, it would be best to divorce before children are involved!
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 29, 2018 12:39:44 GMT -5
Unfortuanely, h is right. Your best option at this point is probably to find a shelter.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 29, 2018 5:18:06 GMT -5
Your story is very intense. Would you try something? Read your story as though you were an outsider. What do YOU think it lools like? Often, I think if a person has to ask a specific question like that, they know the answer.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 29, 2018 1:34:48 GMT -5
Greetings. I am 31 and have been married for 2 and a half years. We've been together 6 years total and have no children together. I recently came across this forum after searching for answers to my troubling situation. I read through many posts over the course of that day. I was happy to find a place to vent heal my marriage. Knowing I am not alone in this struggle changes my perspective from helpless and hopeless to empowering. Thank you! Vent as much as you need, and at least now you know there's others in a similar situation. It is good that things like this are around now so there is something of a support group, and you can start to work on it before it goes on much longer.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 28, 2018 21:32:36 GMT -5
Got me feelin' like....
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 27, 2018 6:01:23 GMT -5
Happy ending massages for women... Sounds great. A new show on Viceland I thought some people might find interesting.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 23, 2018 21:06:06 GMT -5
So sorry to hear tiredoftears. Nobody deserves to have their feelings dismissed in such a callous manner. I feel for you. To answer the question posed, I will probably be at a local bar on Valentines Day. I’m sure my roomie will be upset, but I’m going to be fucked one way or another. Might as well go out swinging at real opportunities. But I may end up at home with a new toy that I purchase for myself. ☺ Good for you, Brian!
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 23, 2018 21:04:40 GMT -5
I believe the counselor chuckled in amusement, because, much like I, she believed he would forget to think about the answer, and his response just verified her thoughts. She even said after my outburst that he tries to take the easy way out and if something id uncomfortable to him, he just doesn't think about it, and when he gets confronted, he just gets sheepish, or totally clams up, or goes into deer in headlights mode. She asked him what he thought about me taking another lover, but us continuing our relationship as it is, and he said he doesn't think that would be good for Max (our 19 month old).
She told him,"Well, she is letting you know where she stands, and giving you a time frame to respond in. How does that make you feel?"
He said something like, "Like I need to start plannimg something for Valentine's Day."
The rest of the session we talked about Max, since he usually comes with us.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 23, 2018 17:55:24 GMT -5
So... Valentine's Day is coming up. I just wondered what people here have planned or usually do in a sexless relationship?
I ask because apparently, expecting sex just because both partners are physically able isn't on the table, hasn't been there last two years, why should it be this year? In counseling last week, he was supposed to have an answer as to why after we found out i was pregnant years ago, he suddenly started denying me sex, while spending hours on porn or chatting with cam girls, because our last counseling appointment at the begining of December, i told him it has been long enough, I want a real answer. So at the appointment, I asked, and he chuckled amd said he had forgotten to think about it. HE CHUCKLED!!! LIKE IT WAS A FUCKING JOKE!!! The counselor then let out a chuckle too, and I erupted. I screamed at him that hasn't had a mere month to think about this, he has had TWO FUCKING YEARS to think about this, and I expect a real fucking answer, a real fucking apology without stupid god damn excuses, and some fucking dick on Valentine's day this year, because if he ain't gonna put out, I WILL find someone somewhere to give me a good dicking down. (Most likely through craigslist)
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 23, 2018 3:02:47 GMT -5
I would gladly take it and pretend he was a paralyzed patient and I his nasty nurse, or any other fantasy I could attach, and be beyond happy with it.
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Post by tiredoftears on Jan 14, 2018 3:57:15 GMT -5
I stopped doing my chores because i get no sex. After 6 months of no sex, i stopped doing his laundry. Another six months i started doing MINIMUM housework. Another six months started MINIMUM cooking AND sleeping on the pullout in the living room. Do you think any change came about? No. He finally agreed to counseling, and we have been going, this coming appointment Monday he is supposed to have an answer to why the sex stopped.
I have known a few women who had a secret "kink" about men doing housework. That was about the only time they got horny. I admit, it is a bit of a turn on to me to, however it seems most thing are capable of arousing me, or i am just always aroused. I wonder, do you think this may possibly be a kink for her, and she is ashamed to admit it, so portrays it in a fashion that makes it look like she is withholding sex unless you "do your chores like a good boy?"
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