|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Apr 8, 2017 13:46:26 GMT -5
WOW!! I hope it keeps your daughter with you too! I also hope you get some positive feed back from your attorney about all this?
More and more verification that you made the right choice,and should distance yourself as much as possible.
As expected there is zero "compromise" from him. Compromise to a narc. means "my way only, and what is best for me".
|
|
|
|
Post by McRoomMate on Apr 8, 2017 14:48:57 GMT -5
Stbx has send me a new 'proposal', it is supposed to be a compromise. He demands a lot of money. And he states that I have enough. Especially because in his calculation he has added the inheritance I would have if my father would die now. My father is old, but in good health. Probably will live for at least ten more years. It is ridiculous so I won't agree with it. More important is that he wrote that he is going to move back to the Netherlands. He has applied for a house somewhere in the region of MIL. It is going to take at least several months most likely. He will take my daughter with him back to the Netherlands. At least that is what he announced. He suggests that if I pay enough, there is a chance that my daughter would see me occasionnally. Implicitly he is saying that I won't see her if I don't pay as much as he wants. I have forwarded his e-mail to my lawyer, the youth care lady and the police officer with whom I have spoken before. I hope that will help to keep my daughter here or at least have some positive effect. Courage and Strength. This SOB (excuse me) deserves NO MERCY. Stay cool and serve that dish nice and cold ! ! ! H ![]() e deserves NO MERCY - just get medieval on him . . . via your lawyer. Cold as Ice and Steal.  |
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on Apr 8, 2017 15:02:21 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on Apr 8, 2017 15:06:13 GMT -5
greatcoastal I will discuss this wherever is necessary, but so far there seems to be not that much hope for me because my daughter is 16 and everyone expects her to be able to express an opinion. They don't understand that that is impossible for her as long as she is with her dad. Or maybe they do understand but simply don't know what to do about it.
|
|
|
|
Post by petrushka on Apr 8, 2017 19:21:58 GMT -5
It seems that Mr. Nutjob is running true to form.
I translate that approach from him as "gimme money or you'll never see your daughter again". That's so .... B-grade movie.
I guess, coming from a C-grade imagination (oh, now I'm getting snarky). {laughs}
I totally get the point why he is not in employment. As you said, the OCD will severely impair him, but also I would say that
his extreme narcissism would have him try to take over the running of what-ever outfit gives him a try before he even understands
what it is they do. Which rarely goes down well.
Anyway, have a nice Sunday. I'm off again to my workshop to make some sawdust, and to empty/sort some boxes into drawers.
|
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Apr 8, 2017 21:15:20 GMT -5
greatcoastal I will discuss this wherever is necessary, but so far there seems to be not that much hope for me because my daughter is 16 and everyone expects her to be able to express an opinion. They don't understand that that is impossible for her as long as she is with her dad. Or maybe they do understand but simply don't know what to do about it. Dear friend, I don't quiet understand? I do know about her being afraid to speak up for herself. I understand her caving to the pressure and being with dad. But if the court decides she stays with you, isn't there the hope that she can slowly recover, due to your wonderful influence, and the two of you can form a tight bond? she would be a happier person. That's what I was hoping for! |
|
|
|
Post by obobfla on Apr 8, 2017 21:34:20 GMT -5
I really don't see a healthy teenage girl who would rather spend her life with an out-of-work obsessive compulsive father over a normal mother. Granted, she may be brainwashed. But I've seen plenty of "Daddy's little girls" who later rebel in the worse possible way. I am hoping that you get full custody for her sake. The man you have described should not be raising children.
|
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on Apr 9, 2017 4:00:51 GMT -5
It seems that Mr. Nutjob is running true to form. I translate that approach from him as "gimme money or you'll never see your daughter again". That's so .... B-grade movie. I guess, coming from a C-grade imagination (oh, now I'm getting snarky). {laughs} I totally get the point why he is not in employment. As you said, the OCD will severely impair him, but also I would say that his extreme narcissism would have him try to take over the running of what-ever outfit gives him a try before he even understands what it is they do. Which rarely goes down well. Anyway, have a nice Sunday. I'm off again to my workshop to make some sawdust, and to empty/sort some boxes into drawers. He doesn't even try to get a job. He just wants others to give him money. He wants me to pay for everything and also give him a considerable amount. Because after 30 years he deserves that, so he says. Enjoy your day in the workshop! |
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on Apr 9, 2017 4:04:00 GMT -5
greatcoastal I will discuss this wherever is necessary, but so far there seems to be not that much hope for me because my daughter is 16 and everyone expects her to be able to express an opinion. They don't understand that that is impossible for her as long as she is with her dad. Or maybe they do understand but simply don't know what to do about it. Dear friend, I don't quiet understand? I do know about her being afraid to speak up for herself. I understand her caving to the pressure and being with dad. But if the court decides she stays with you, isn't there the hope that she can slowly recover, due to your wonderful influence, and the two of you can form a tight bond? she would be a happier person. That's what I was hoping for! If I get my daughter to stay with me, I am confident that she will recover. But getting her with me is not easy. She has withdrawn and avoids giving an opinion, she tries to escape reality. I fully understand that because it is what I have done too. It seems that everyone thinks she is better off with me, but getting that fixed is an other thing. |
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on Apr 9, 2017 4:06:05 GMT -5
I really don't see a healthy teenage girl who would rather spend her life with an out-of-work obsessive compulsive father over a normal mother. Granted, she may be brainwashed. But I've seen plenty of "Daddy's little girls" who later rebel in the worse possible way. I am hoping that you get full custody for her sake. The man you have described should not be raising children. She constantly hears that I am insane and irresponsible and criminal for leaving her and her dad. He constantly uses her as a party in our marriage, being her and him One party. She is not rebelling yet, she is mentally a lot younger than her true age. I hope so too that she will come to live with me. |
|
|
|
Post by eternaloptimism on Apr 9, 2017 5:44:47 GMT -5
Dear friend, I don't quiet understand? I do know about her being afraid to speak up for herself. I understand her caving to the pressure and being with dad. But if the court decides she stays with you, isn't there the hope that she can slowly recover, due to your wonderful influence, and the two of you can form a tight bond? she would be a happier person. That's what I was hoping for! If I get my daughter to stay with me, I am confident that she will recover. But getting her with me is not easy. She has withdrawn and avoids giving an opinion, she tries to escape reality. I fully understand that because it is what I have done too. It seems that everyone thinks she is better off with me, but getting that fixed is an other thing. This must be so hard for you T. You can only only do your best though. I know he's a shit and is basically grooming her and messing with her head. Keep your head high. You are doing all the right things. This WILL be ok. Xxxxx |
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on May 4, 2017 13:31:40 GMT -5
Well, some more e-mails have been sent about his interpretation of the verdict, which is - of course - something completely different from anybody else's view. I should keep paying all the bills and on top of that the modest temporary alimony the judge said in his verdict.
I have made clear I don't agree with that, so probably he indeed will appeal. I wrote that since I left, I have used more than half of my salary to pay his bills and support until the verdict. So (according to me) not much chance he'll get more in appeal.
Yesterday he mailed me again to tell me again that I have a legal and moral obligation to him and my daughter. I am clearly evil according to him. And I am destroying his and my daughters' life.
At the end of his e-mail he wrote that my behavior is inhumane and his family is praying that the evil will be taken away from me!...
I imagine next thing that will happen is a priest knocking at the door for an exorcism treatment... *eye roll*
...Actually, I wouldn't mind if the evil would be taken away. My interpretation is a little different though.
|
|
|
|
Post by hopingforachange on May 4, 2017 13:56:10 GMT -5
Well, some more e-mails have been sent about his interpretation of the verdict, which is - of course - something completely different from anybody else's view. I should keep paying all the bills and on top of that the modest temporary alimony the judge said in his verdict. I have made clear I don't agree with that, so probably he indeed will appeal. I wrote that since I left, I have used more than half of my salary to pay his bills and support until the verdict. So (according to me) not much chance he'll get more in appeal. Yesterday he mailed me again to tell me again that I have a legal and moral obligation to him and my daughter. I am clearly evil according to him. And I am destroying his and my daughters' life. At the end of his e-mail he wrote that my behavior is inhumane and his family is praying that the evil will be taken away from me!... I imagine next thing that will happen is a priest knocking at the door for an exorcism treatment... *eye roll* ...Actually, I wouldn't mind if the evil would be taken away. My interpretation is a little different though. He violated his wedding vows and moral obligations when he stopped caring for tire needs. |
|
|
|
Post by tamara68 on May 4, 2017 13:58:49 GMT -5
Well, some more e-mails have been sent about his interpretation of the verdict, which is - of course - something completely different from anybody else's view. I should keep paying all the bills and on top of that the modest temporary alimony the judge said in his verdict. I have made clear I don't agree with that, so probably he indeed will appeal. I wrote that since I left, I have used more than half of my salary to pay his bills and support until the verdict. So (according to me) not much chance he'll get more in appeal. Yesterday he mailed me again to tell me again that I have a legal and moral obligation to him and my daughter. I am clearly evil according to him. And I am destroying his and my daughters' life. At the end of his e-mail he wrote that my behavior is inhumane and his family is praying that the evil will be taken away from me!... I imagine next thing that will happen is a priest knocking at the door for an exorcism treatment... *eye roll* ...Actually, I wouldn't mind if the evil would be taken away. My interpretation is a little different though. He violated his wedding vows and moral obligations when he stopped caring for tire needs. According to him I stopped caring. And he has been keeping working hard for me, so I am an ungrateful bloody bitch |
|
|
|
Post by wewbwb on May 4, 2017 14:37:20 GMT -5
According to him I stopped caring. And he has been keeping working hard for me, so I am an ungrateful bloody bitch* *Sexy hot woman to everyone else. |
|
