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Post by skguy on May 17, 2017 8:37:43 GMT -5
Not too far. Montana in hour in a half or so. Just renewed passports again, so free to travel. Ah, I'm only 20 minutes from the Canadian border but on the Ontario end. These two countries are just so big. We need private jets to take us to meet ups.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 21:41:25 GMT -5
Not too far. Montana in hour in a half or so. Just renewed passports again, so free to travel. It's about time you renewed your passport!!! Lol Will have them tomorrow.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 13:30:54 GMT -5
ggold, if he has known this was coming for a long time... and now he is dragging his feet to share the financials with you... there's a chance he's trying to spin a story, not just being lazy. Especially since you don't trust him, strongly consider having him served soon to legally block him from any financial funny business he might not have executed already. If he still wants to mediate, great, but the ball is in motion and your interests are more protected. And it wouldn't be wise to tell him the plan before he's been served. You are right but I am not emotionally prepared to serve him right now. I want to give mediation a chance. I am fully aware he could be working behind the scenes. You're one of the strongest people I know. Hang in there my friend.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 11:57:11 GMT -5
Yes!!!! Finally there is another! See, see, now we just need convince people that Seattle doesn't rain ALL the time and maybe they will come this way According to the Swiffer WetJet commercial, it rains all the time 😉 I was in Seattle once. No rain in site 🙂
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 11:53:38 GMT -5
Ah come on wewbwb....that's a cute card. That is very cute.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 8:09:34 GMT -5
I'm your neighbour, next door in SK. I always expect everyone to be down east. So nice to have a neighbour. Plus, if I spell words with extra letters, you'll understand. Lived in cowtown for 3 years. Otherwise SK We get your chinooks nowadays. Hard to keep the igloo in top condition. I lived in cowtown for 10. Then returned to the capital. I miss the mountains. My mom lives in BC, so it was great to get in the car and visit on a weekend. I am I right to assume you were in YYC for O&G career? No O&G. Just school for IT. I wish I had of been into hiking at the time. It's free(didn't have much money) and the mountains were so close. I miss those mountains too. Although I lived in NE Cowtown, my townhouse was close enough to Deerfoot, and I was lucky to have a mountain view out my window.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 7:58:31 GMT -5
@skguy, and yet, there must be as many sexless marriages in Canada. Unless people use sex to keep warm in our igloos. ;-) Are we neighbours, I'm in AB, or did you leave your home (SK?) for opportunity elsewhere?. I'm your neighbour, next door in SK. I always expect everyone to be down east. So nice to have a neighbour. Plus, if I spell words with extra letters, you'll understand. Lived in cowtown for 3 years. Otherwise SK We get your chinooks nowadays. Hard to keep the igloo in top condition.
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Post by skguy on May 15, 2017 6:48:49 GMT -5
I'm also of the Great White North :-) We are few and far between. How far into the Great White North? It does share a border with the US. Not too far. Montana in hour in a half or so. Just renewed passports again, so free to travel.
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Post by skguy on May 14, 2017 22:59:01 GMT -5
Great white north is my home. I'm also of the Great White North :-) We are few and far between.
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Post by skguy on Jan 6, 2017 14:51:33 GMT -5
I had never heard of gaslighting either. I'm sure many on here the victim of that.
I think he is doing that to you 😞
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Post by skguy on Jan 3, 2017 22:19:45 GMT -5
So today I finally tried to talk to H about SM, and whether he could tell me why he can't bring himself to kiss me or try anything intimate. No reply. I suggested separation, explaining that 23 years of this rejection has left me with no self esteem. His response ' what 'rejection?' He then played the whole a anxiety card, saying he would be lonely and how much he loves me etc. I kept my cool and stated that I can't carry on living with someone who refuses to try to resolve our issues. Response ' what issues? I'm happy' I feel like I have been talking to a brick wall for years and years. I admit to l losing it at this point, and getting frustrated, asking him what is so wrong with me that makes him find me so hideous. He said it was because he often has a headache or feels stressed. I suggested that sometimes being intimate can relieve stress. He just looked at me and said 'really?' I said that of course it does - don't you find it the nicest thing in the world? I suppose I could guess his response of 'not really' I told him he must be with the wrong person if he doesn't fancy me at all. He just said it is because I am always in a bad mood and sees me like a head teacher not a wife. I now feel at rock bottom, have cried for two hours. People who know me generally say I am a kind, warm person so what have i done so wrong that he doesn't like me? Seriously screwed with my head. You sound like a great person. Not your fault. You just want to be loved and enjoy the intimacy you deserve. I'm sorry you have to experience all this. Hugs
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Post by skguy on Jan 1, 2017 18:36:28 GMT -5
🙂 we had those today too. Can't hurt.
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Post by skguy on Dec 30, 2016 23:48:17 GMT -5
Girl, you and me both. Hang in there with your eye firmly on the finish line. We WILL get out. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Take it one day at a time. Before you know it, we'll be cracking the champagne together!! I can't wait to hear the day you both can celebrate together. That will make my day.
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Post by skguy on Dec 30, 2016 23:45:16 GMT -5
I had the chance once. I had an out. I chose to forgive. I certainly have mixed feelings about my decision. Plus I never did truly forgive. You're probably right about you having to do it yourself. I don't come on here often anymore. But when I do I see all the great people. And I always wish something great for all. I get that "never truly forgiving" - my ex stepped outside of the sidelines our first year of marriage. I forgave him and we went on for 22 more years but after finding EP and coming out of the fog it all came back to me and I couldn't forgive it or the SM. I did well forgetting about it for 7 or 8 years. Mostly while my kid was younger. When it happened I was a bit shocked. Plus I had practically enabled it all by being nice and helpful to someone in need. And was also embarrassed. I couldn't imagine telling people about any of it. I reality I did as much to protect her as I did me. I Had several years of distraction and now I'm constantly aware I'm in a sm Thankfully I found this board in may. And all the great people. And thankfully I found an amazing friend on here. My shoulder to lean on. My best friend.
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Post by skguy on Dec 30, 2016 23:10:49 GMT -5
I think the thing that freaks me out the most is that from an outsider's perspective I have a great marriage. If I exit, I will be the villain for ending it. Sometimes I feel a bit like Leonidas in 300 when his soldiers were concerned that by meeting with the Persian king, they could kill him. To which he replied (paraphrase) "If they kill me, all of Sparta will go to war. Pray we are so lucky." In my case, I feel the same way about my wife. I pray that she would have a affair so that I won't have to be the bad guy. Is that jacked up thinking, or what? I used to hope I'd catch my H in an affair. I even once had a dream he served me with divorce papers and then I realized if the marriage is going to end then it's up to me to do it. I had the chance once. I had an out. I chose to forgive. I certainly have mixed feelings about my decision. Plus I never did truly forgive. You're probably right about you having to do it yourself. I don't come on here often anymore. But when I do I see all the great people. And I always wish something great for all.
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