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Post by JMX on Jun 4, 2016 19:01:01 GMT -5
I waited all day, he fixed the gate on our fence that he broke and I really didn't want to interrupt that.
The youngest went with my mom on a trip, I dropped the oldest off at a slumber party and then, I went to work. I went to the bank and pulled money for the utility bill just in case. I took the cash to my dad's house, did some work errands, stopped by an apartment complex to grab info for him and then went to the liquor store and got some vodka to celebrate tonight!
I got home, complimented him on a job well done on the gate (while he was playing video games), went to my room and got my stuff together. Made a couple of work calls, paper clipped his hard copies I made for him, packed my computer bag with any other paperwork that might relate to the divorce and not what I was giving to him, packed my overnight bag, smoked a cigarette and went in and handed it to him.
"This is what I think a fair divorce will look like. Here is the child custody schedule, and here is a folder with info on the apartment complex down the road. You have 15 days to work with me on this. If you do not, I will file. My appointment is already booked on the 15th of June. We do this together, or I go it alone. I will pay half of the title loan this week and the other when you compromise with me. If you do not work with me, the other half of the title loan is going on the paperwork. I know you will need time to digest it. I am spending the night with my cousin tonight but will be back early tomorrow morning if you are ready to start talking. I have also emailed this to you with all documents in PDF format if you need to discuss this with your brother. "
Him: long silence. "Okay"
Me: "have a good night!"
Boom.
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Post by deborahmanning on Jun 4, 2016 19:02:47 GMT -5
CONGRATULATIONS!
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Post by baza on Jun 4, 2016 19:28:44 GMT -5
I reckon you have done "THE" most important thing necessary in resolving an ILIASM shithole Sister JMX. You have managed to let the air out of the emotional balloon, and deal with the facts on the ground. It would seem that your story "The Brit that changed me" back on May 21 marked a real watershed event for you. - You've done incredibly well. - Any newbies would do well to go back through your run of stories on the old EP group, and read them all, right up to now to see the world of "fully informed choice" in action. - There will yet be a few twists and turns for you to negotiate on your way to the exit, nothing you can't handle though. - Sending much admiration and respect your way JMX.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2016 19:29:33 GMT -5
Do you think he understood any of it? (Although that's HIS problem.)
Congratulations!
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Post by JMX on Jun 4, 2016 19:32:57 GMT -5
Do you think he understood any of it? (Although that's HIS problem.) Congratulations! His brother is a lawyer who interned with a divorce attorney one year. He can help him, even if he lives states away.
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Post by JMX on Jun 4, 2016 19:33:51 GMT -5
baza - I could not have done any of it without the wise words from my fellow ILIASMers - especially you. Thank you, sir!!
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Post by bballgirl on Jun 4, 2016 19:59:19 GMT -5
Congrats I'm so happy for you. I think you have gotten through the hardest part. I think telling them is the hardest and you did a great job!! Celebrate and enjoy tonight!
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Post by obobfla on Jun 4, 2016 20:06:17 GMT -5
You got married in a white dress. I say go out on the town wearing a nice black cocktail dress.
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Post by unmatched on Jun 4, 2016 23:56:53 GMT -5
Well done, girl, I am proud of you! All that agony, all that time being stuck and unable to do what you wanted, and finally you found a way. It won't be the easiest few weeks you have ever had, but it must feel so good to be actually moving forwards again!
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Post by JMX on Jun 5, 2016 0:04:01 GMT -5
Well done, girl, I am proud of you! All that agony, all that time being stuck and unable to do what you wanted, and finally you found a way. It won't be the easiest few weeks you have ever had, but it must feel so good to be actually moving forwards again! Thank you so much! You know those struggles better than most. Sincerely, I appreciate you always being there. Another plus? Not one tear shed! I don't fucking care anymore!!!!!!
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2016 0:06:59 GMT -5
Rock and roll!
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Post by eternaloptimism on Jun 5, 2016 1:28:32 GMT -5
JMX you rock!!! Well done lady ;D
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2016 1:55:22 GMT -5
And, that is what grace under pressure and an empowered woman looks like, ladies and gentlemen. Just facts and figures, completely dispassionate and totally chill. You're a friggin rock star JMX. Rock. Star.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2016 9:00:36 GMT -5
Crazy impressive JMX! Congratulations on this huge step!
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Post by misssunnybunny on Jun 5, 2016 9:30:16 GMT -5
Congratulations! This step felt like the hardest part, saying the words. Big step, hooray!
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