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Post by twotimesone on Jul 7, 2017 23:16:30 GMT -5
What's the problem with using ED drugs? I use Cialis before going to a provider all the time.
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Meh
Jul 5, 2017 8:14:55 GMT -5
Post by twotimesone on Jul 5, 2017 8:14:55 GMT -5
My wife is too lazy to cook. No sex, even starfish sex, complains when I get angry or raise my voice, badmouths me in front of my kids. Gees, if I were you maybe I would talk with the wife but I would've stayed...
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 29, 2017 20:46:20 GMT -5
I stay but have sex with providers. Less money, but at least it keeps my sanity when I go home.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 19:13:00 GMT -5
Gees, I was content with starfish sex for years. I started outsourcing when I got nothing.
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Meh
Jun 28, 2017 18:50:21 GMT -5
Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 18:50:21 GMT -5
By the way you sound that you "have more financial chains binding us than Morley's Ghost." Sounds like you can't fandom the issue of separating from your wife. Maybe instead of 'retiring,' you should get your own bank account, get a part time job and use the money to go to providers.
A wife who cooks well and you are complaining? I wish my wife cooks a half decent meal if I am lucky. 80% nice and 20% crappy and you expect a marriage be all peaches and cream? Can I take your wife?
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 15:54:00 GMT -5
It really depends on what you want to do. It sounds like that you can stay in your SM but giving up on the land and horse or give it up altogether. Can't have cake and eat it too I guess. And it sounds like by you going to a lawyer, you want to get out.
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Meh
Jun 28, 2017 15:25:56 GMT -5
Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 15:25:56 GMT -5
I can certainly understand. So what do you do with your desire? Hold your breath until it passes? Not holding my breath. We've got a small horse farm (so now you'll know I'm in the South East rather than the South like Texas or the South West where the spread is known as a "ranch" instead of a "farm") so there's always something physical to do after desire has been stuffed down. I was fortunate in being able to retire very early from the 9-5 career. Now do some freelance consulting, writing, a couple old German cars I tinker with and of course there's always something to do on the farm. Not a gym rat but work out 3 days a week and am fitter than 80 percent of the guys I see on the street regardless of age. My wife just retired from a rather exotic but very technical job. She used to be away two weeks of each month at a remote location. I'm thinking part of the problem is adjusting to the absence of the highs and lows of the coming and going. Our pattern was that the day after she got home, we'd have a romp and then once or twice before she had to leave again. As for romp quality, probably a 3 or maybe 4 versus a 10 = a half-day marathon with my former Italian-Hungarian New Jersey girl friend. So now we're together all the time and there's nothing special about anything and no "reason" to romp. Just Meh. Like Flashjohn says, what do you want then? At least you can romp with your wife, which is more than what most people here would get. Are you willing to spend the time and money to outsource? Old men are expected to pay to outsource younger women. Are you willing to exit from your wife?
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 13:15:40 GMT -5
My exit plan is probably a few years away when the kids are out of the nest. By then, I will have a financially better situation and probably kids don't care as much. The woman who I am interested in is also married with a child. With my W, she doesn't want to sleep with me for years and we sleep in different beds. Sometimes complains in front of my kids that I am a bad dad because I am more strict with the kids. I don't yell at her but I am more like living with a housemate at this point. Sounds good to me. (Not that I'm here to judge, or advise you "for" or "against" outsourcing. I just wanted to know if YOU have a reason in YOUR head.) PS: I agree with the caution about dating someone you know where you have common social circles. Presuming you both want to keep the relationship a secret, anyone you date will have to have the commitment (attention to detail and technical skill) to cover her tracks. If she slips up, it could be bad. If she slips up and you have overlapping social circles, it could be REALLY bad, or get bad REALLY fast. Factor this in, as best you can... Thanks. Before I joined this forum, I question myself whether what I am doing is the best course for me. So far, I have been doing okay for the 2 years when I outsourced to providers and I learned plenty about covering tracks.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 11:29:38 GMT -5
I agree with flashjohn. If you are here by now maybe you should just give up on trying to get your romps from your wife and talk about alternative strategies. Do you have an exit strategy or what are your plans for outsourcing?
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 10:22:26 GMT -5
Thanks. I think I might disclose that I am unhappy with my marriage and not discuss anything about going outside the marriage yet. Sometimes I think 10 steps ahead and that's not a good idea. OK my turn to ask you a question: If you've decided that your marriage is in a bad enough state that you are pursuing in outsourcing... then why are you preferring outsourcing over making an exit plan? My exit plan is probably a few years away when the kids are out of the nest. By then, I will have a financially better situation and probably kids don't care as much. The woman who I am interested in is also married with a child. With my W, she doesn't want to sleep with me for years and we sleep in different beds. Sometimes complains in front of my kids that I am a bad dad because I am more strict with the kids. I don't yell at her but I am more like living with a housemate at this point.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 28, 2017 8:32:24 GMT -5
I agree with seabreeze... I think you need to ease into it more. ... So, take it slow... you have time, you aren't going anywhere! I agree with seabr33z3 and mrslowmaintenance ... mostly. The "middle path" I can imagine is this: basically, disclose that you are unhappy in your marriage, and that you have gone outside of it in the past. If this does not disgust her, ask obliquely if she has ever considered the same. If you haven't lost her yet, mention you are considering looking again, if the right person comes along. You can decide based on her reaction if and when it might be possible to ask her if she would consider that with YOU. Thanks. I think I might disclose that I am unhappy with my marriage and not discuss anything about going outside the marriage yet. Sometimes I think 10 steps ahead and that's not a good idea.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 27, 2017 23:47:32 GMT -5
Look, I am perfectly fine if she says no to the affair. For my sm, I actually outsourced but I rather go with someone who is smart and whitty than someone who I want to screw with. Personally I am not that crazy about sex itself but I care more about emotional attachment with someone else. Yes, it does sound a little immature and stuff. But my main question for mostly for the ladies who are married, if another married guy who you know asked, what would be your response. Why the rush? Why blurt it out? Why not ask her out for coffee again. Then again. Then maybe dinner or a movie. If she's not interested you'll soon get the message. The other seems a tad forthright to me. She may in fact be up for it, but that may be the thing that puts her off. You know, that's a good idea. I guess if she doesn't like me, maybe I will get the hint.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 27, 2017 23:31:33 GMT -5
Look, I am perfectly fine if she says no to the affair. For my sm, I actually outsourced but I rather go with someone who is smart and whitty than someone who I want to screw with. Personally I am not that crazy about sex itself but I care more about emotional attachment with someone else.
Yes, it does sound a little immature and stuff. But my main question for mostly for the ladies who are married, if another married guy who you know asked, what would be your response.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 27, 2017 22:59:48 GMT -5
The question is why does she wearing a lingerie. Gees, my W don't even own one and complains if I see her in her underwear.
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Post by twotimesone on Jun 27, 2017 22:50:29 GMT -5
Well. Here's the story. I have a friend that I know which I once dated for a while, but I broke up with her and decided to marry my current W. Since then she got married and I got married. With the current situation with our SM, I have been looking at "alternative choices."
Recently I have been thinking of having an affair with my old flame, not to break up and marry her, but to have a social and emotional affair. I not sure what she would say. So the other day I asked her to go out to lunch and she says no prob, we talked, I complemented her but I just couldn't break the ice about talking about my question.
The thing is that I could not gage if she is happy or unhappy with her marriage, but I recall one time she blurted out in front of our friends that she wants to divorce him. Not sure if she means it or not, but maybe I could break the ice with asking her with that question. But I am not sure if this would be bad for our friendship.
Not sure what you ladies have experience with situations like this and what happens when a guy ask you this question. But I am not sure that what I am doing is a bridge too far. Thanks.
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