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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 14, 2017 14:21:21 GMT -5
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 14, 2017 11:20:06 GMT -5
@awakeforethedance I absolutely LOVE hearing your experience! It's so beautiful and what you always dreamt of, no? No one is perfect, but clearly you have found a balance with your differences, and what you love, clearly outweighs the differences. Btw, I tend to ramble. Feel free to call me on it when I do!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 13, 2017 7:14:28 GMT -5
I received this in my inbox. Probably too late for many of us, but maybe there is someone here it can help.... A few weeks ago, I saw a couple for the first time in coaching.
They were seeing me because after years of experiencing tension around their lack of sexual intimacy, they wanted help.
At the end of the session, one of them said something that totally floored me:
“I realise now that I need to focus more on EMOTIONAL INTIMACY with my wife rather than SEXUAL INTIMACY.”
Since then we’ve been working with practical strategies to help them reconnect and ignite lasting desire in their relationship - with incredible results.
Today I want to share 3 keys to sustaining desire - so you can experience deeper connection, intimacy and love.
1. Begin with emotional intimacy
We need a happy, loving relationship for desire to really thrive. Yet, in our busy world, we can quickly become disconnected and feel like ships passing in the night - or more like house mates than lovers. We need to spend time together, make an effort to connect and build emotional connection as a foundation for sexual intimacy.
2. Understand that women’s sexual desire is different from male sexual desire
We often expect women’s sexual desire to react behave the way male sexual desire does - and feel confused and frustrated when it doesn’t. Women have a different make-up of hormones than men - and from a Tantric perspective, our energy flows differently too. Our sexual desire is often more likely to be responsive than spontaneous, which means we need to cultivate our desire.
3. Focus on sensual pleasure
Sensuality and pleasure are vital to igniting lasting desire. And these can often be forgotten as we focus more on our partner or fulfilling a ‘goal’ of intercourse rather than just enjoyment. Sensual, loving touch helps our bodies to release oxytocin which helps us feel connected and helps ignite desire.
Regaining intimacy and desire with our partner can feel just too hard. But I’m here to tell you that it’s possible and it’s worth it.
Next Thursday I’m running a FREE Workshop where I’ll be talking more about how to reconnect and ignite lasting desire.
FREE ONLINE WORKSHOP
How to Reconnect, Feel Inseparable + Ignite Lasting Desire with your Love
Click here to sign up and receive the replay.
Wishing you a joyful, safe and relaxing long weekend Ann.
With love,
Isiah.xx
Isiah McKimmie
Couples Therapist | Sexologist | Coach
info@isiah-mckimmie.com | www.isiah-mckimmie.com
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 21:09:48 GMT -5
You say you are feeling sad. Even hopeless. These are possible paths for you from from here: sad --> hopeless --> depressed and miserable --> stay at sad sad --> hopeless --> angry --> more conversations --> try to change him --> probably won't work --> back to sad sad --> hopeless --> angry --> empowered/motivated --> realize that you can't change him; you can only change you If you feel you have "not yet been clear enough" about your needs, consider trying again, or consider trying individual or marital therapy. But if in your heart of hearts you believe you've been trying earnestly for a long time and he is STILL not getting it (or getting it but not doing anything about it)... you may need to consider What @dan said. Or Yoda. Which ever you relate to! I've found a lot of networking groups on facebook, and if you are in a nice city, there should be plenty of things going on so you can go out and Network. I'm in the DC area so if you are ever looking to meet for HH, let me know! Congratultions on your GRAD degree!!!! That is so exciting and I hope it will lead you to wonderful things!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 20:54:07 GMT -5
Even in the south in the U.S., the law cannot force you to stay married. Your STBX sounds crazier with every story you tell. Have you gotten everything you really care about out of the home you shared with her? No. My dog is still there. That's gonna be the biggest next fight, I think. Maryland? Sounds like crazy laws in MD. I wish you luck and keep your head high! You deserve better than her!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 20:50:56 GMT -5
I dated. I dated a lot. Honestly I got tired of it after a while. I met a few men I would like to settle into relationships with and cut the others off. Then things didn't materialize as I had hoped, and off I went searching again! Again, narrowed to two or three and then finally down to one. I made sure to give them a hint if I liked them. Usually making out, which probably lead to him fingering me until I screamed, or me realizing he had a hard cock which I created and therefore must resolve. Yeah, I love to blow and if I am in the mood and there's a hard cock in front of me, in my mouth it goes. I was once told I make love with my mouth There were several I said goodnight to with nothing more than a wave goodbye - forever!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 20:40:23 GMT -5
McRoomMate lol... DH -- something one doesn't hear often in this forum means "Dear Husband". Not said sarcastically in my case. haha. HA! Or Damn Husband, or Dick Head, or.... geez, I used to know quite a few of them!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 20:36:12 GMT -5
I have to wonder just exactly how and where that would plot on a binary graph. LOL bballgirl, you rock !!! Honestly the question means nothing. The true test is by performance. I've been with men that you can tell they don't truly enjoy eating pussy they just do it until I cum once then they are all about themselves. I want a man that gets off on pleasing a woman and hearing her moan and scream only feeds his ego and wants to continue. That's the way I give a blowjob with that philosophy, it's feeds me as much as you. However a lot of selfish people out there, it's tough to find someone nowadays to be compatible with and sex is just one aspect of course. Oh and thanks for the kind words! You're awesome too! Damn girl we are a LOT alike. I'll be in ■■■■ in a few weeks if you still live in ■■■■! Not that I'd have time, but maybe
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 17:06:58 GMT -5
Well Done cagedtiger! You told her to SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT, cuz there are people waiting in line. I'm not familiar with your history, but she sounds like a narcissistic, delusional woman. Can I ask what state you live in? Are you in the US?
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 12, 2017 11:16:07 GMT -5
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 11, 2017 14:41:40 GMT -5
Given most peoples position when they get here, hows about - "Everything Is Great Bar the Sex" - Or, to be more accurate - "mymarriageisabigfuckup/andtheresnotevenanysextocompensate" - Anyway, so much for suggested names. I was searching "gumtree" in my jurisdiction back in Feb 09. It's like a buy / swap / sell site. I was looking for a truck at the time. Gumtree also had a small 'personals' part on it, and there was a link to the Experience Project site and the ILIASM group within it. I do not know to this day why I bothered clicking on the link, but I did, thus setting in train a series of events that completely changed my life. LOL! I just looked up "allgood.com" It appears to be available. I wonder how much it costs. Ah yes Baza, I remember you on EP. I think there were a couple of times you posted after having a few beers, and those were particularly amusing! So glad I found you roaming these halls!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 11, 2017 14:36:53 GMT -5
I haven't had a problem with "sex" spam on my computer (or in my life lol) I googled sex and it came up with women's health and men's health, the psychology today.... No porn. I think people looking for porn are typing in "porn" LOL!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 10, 2017 20:16:32 GMT -5
Okay - 3 women all telling me the same thing.
Any men wanna weigh in?
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 10, 2017 20:11:19 GMT -5
Thank you Flash
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Post by Venus Erotes on Apr 10, 2017 19:55:13 GMT -5
Thank you sweetie. That's what I was thinking.
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