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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 26, 2017 19:39:54 GMT -5
For me reset sex is the worst. We didn't have a male equivalent of starfish sex, really. When I could get him to do it, at least he did it pretty well! ;-> Reset sex hurt on an emotional level. I enjoyed it...he enjoyed it...why didn't we do it more often? I would say this to him afterwards, and he would verbally agree with me. And then there would be another long drought. His words and his behavior were two different things. Signs of a man living in the dark...
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 25, 2017 22:42:06 GMT -5
I say I am here for my children.
I wonder what damage my unhealthy marriage does to my children.
I'm starting to wonder if it's worth it. How much of me must I compromise? Can I truly let hubs go and still remain in this home with him?
I just don't know.
Why do you stay?
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 25, 2017 22:39:44 GMT -5
The best bad sex I ever had was reset sex. I figured out some tricks to last and last, and in doing so came to a better understanding of just exactly how ambivalent my wife was to the whole experience. When you've given her the fuck to end all fucks and understand she does not give a fuck about fucking, it's easier to say, "fuck that." Giving up hope that it will ever be what I want has been very freeing. The only sex I ever had with hubs was reset sex. It's all terrible.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 25, 2017 22:38:29 GMT -5
Sex with out connection.... terrible. Why bother when a hand and a fantasy can give you so much more?
Relationship without touch - THE WORST.
Rejection after rejection after rejection... lonely, depressed, and no one else understands. Not knowing where to turn. Sexless Marriage is such an unhealthy shit hole. We all deserve more.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 24, 2017 8:45:15 GMT -5
AH!!!! Gotcha. THANK YOU!
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 24, 2017 8:44:29 GMT -5
Oh my goodness hopingforachange Does she understand that not having sex with you is her telling you she doesn't love you? You feel rejected? Isolated? Depressed? Does she understand sexual abandonment is reason for divorce and one of the major reasons for divorce in this country? Is she willing to work on her issues to keep the marriage? and my final question.... What are you doing for YOU? How are you taking care of yourself? Yes she does, all of those emotions have been discussed during therapy or during our nightly talks. Now she feels bad about how much pain she caused over the years. Just a few months ago I started doing activities that I enjoyed again but I had to limit what I could do as I recover from surgery. That's right - surgery. Hope you are healing quickly! She's going to have a TON of emotional crap to deal with. Is she going to counseling for her shit?
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 24, 2017 8:40:14 GMT -5
I've been around a while, but I keep seeing "LL". What does it stand for here? I trust it's not Living Large....
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 24, 2017 8:31:47 GMT -5
Oh my goodness hopingforachangeDoes she understand that not having sex with you is her telling you she doesn't love you? You feel rejected? Isolated? Depressed? Does she understand sexual abandonment is reason for divorce and one of the major reasons for divorce in this country? Is she willing to work on her issues to keep the marriage? and my final question.... What are you doing for YOU? How are you taking care of yourself?
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 20, 2017 21:03:15 GMT -5
SM as now been compared to being in the Mob. Or Ikea. You can get out of Ikea, you just need to spend money to do so and there's not necessarily any emotional attachment. Or is there? These are the times I question how fucked up I really am. example: I zero'd in on the word "harder", and out of context before reading the rest of your post. Fuck I need to get laid. They have a term for that... They have a term for EVERYTHING, but this one confuses me. I mean, I love having a dickpressed into my warm, hot loins.... Dammit there I go again.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 20, 2017 20:54:32 GMT -5
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 20, 2017 20:48:31 GMT -5
Sure I'll agree with this. Just keep in mind that the longer one is married the harder it is to get out. Like the mob. Or Ikea. SM as now been compared to being in the Mob. Or Ikea. You can get out of Ikea, you just need to spend money to do so and there's not necessarily any emotional attachment. Or is there? These are the times I question how fucked up I really am. example: I zero'd in on the word "harder", and out of context before reading the rest of your post. Fuck I need to get laid.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 20, 2017 20:45:24 GMT -5
I'm 18. Just ignore the age range beneath my avatar
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 20, 2017 19:41:39 GMT -5
In my mind, it's love vs infatuation. Most relationships start with infatuation, which is an immature vision of love. I'm defining "immature" to mean the maturity of the relationship, it has nothing to do with the maturity or age of the person.
Doesn't infatuation wane in all relationships to the comfortable "I love you" of everyday life? Life is not a fairy tale, or a romantic comedy. Life is just that - life. It's what you choose to do with that life that defines who you are.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 18, 2017 17:54:00 GMT -5
I think a few here might remember my last one. Borderline rape ish. Or consenting for fear of the consequences of not consenting. Amazing how cocaine and alcohol made a previously non sexually interested person decide they must have sex. It's a bit messy! That was April I think. So 0-3 months for me then. I remember. Scared the living crap out of me. Love you EO.
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Post by Venus Erotes on Jun 18, 2017 17:52:28 GMT -5
With Hubs it will be 2 years Mid November.
Open marriage = Friday night!
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