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Post by lwoetin on May 11, 2016 12:36:55 GMT -5
Music is therapy. Without it, we probably would go mad already. What fave song best identifies your SM?
Mine is about needing (real) love to be more than words. Extreme - More Than Words
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Post by lwoetin on May 11, 2016 12:11:11 GMT -5
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Post by lwoetin on May 11, 2016 11:52:28 GMT -5
elle, i like your fashion statement with the pink hair and the glow of light around you. Don't let his depression take you down. His lack of desire to touch you is his problem, not yours. Good to have you in the group. Stay strong and try to cheer up. I was wondering if she's naturally pink or does she color it? Yeah there is a way to figure it out but let's not on her first story.
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Post by lwoetin on May 11, 2016 11:36:59 GMT -5
elle, i like your fashion statement with the pink hair and the glow of light around you. Don't let his depression take you down. His lack of desire to touch you is his problem, not yours. Good to have you in the group. Stay strong and try to cheer up.
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Post by lwoetin on May 8, 2016 5:21:33 GMT -5
Isolating yourself from people is not a good idea so I hope you did go and take chances at meeting new people. But it is OK if you chose not to go at this time, you will have other opportunities. I have my own social anxieties and I go with what I have. You are a strong person and can get through this. It's a difficult situation to be in a new place with no friends but there are good people everywhere to get to know, so you should get to know them. Also, if you find another forum that helps you then join that. You don't have to leave this forum. Just post less often. But don't isolate yourself. Good luck. (I first met you in EP a while back and I believe you were the one with a Latin quote. I can't remember it though.) Amori et Dolori Sacrum: A shrine to love and sorrow. Thank you. Yes, I love that quote. Applies to my marriage actually. My feelings about finding support in ILIASM is that the worst support is having no support. Hearing something that sounds unpleasant is not the worst. When I started out in EP, I had one friend. She was incredibly kind and listened to me. It was easy to open up to her. Which made me vulnerable to one (and last since I left EP for a period of time after that) of her comments when she suggested I "put my big boy pants on". She meant well. But it was not received well. Whether it was helpful or not, who knows. But I came back and we stayed friends afterwards. The really, truly bad, worst ever feeling is having no one care about you and that is my biggest fear every time I post a story...that no one replies and no one cares. So zero response is like absolute temperature, lifeless 0 Kelvin degrees and any additional energy is something to warm you up. We're here and you are not alone carisimmi.
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Post by lwoetin on May 7, 2016 5:08:46 GMT -5
Isolating yourself from people is not a good idea so I hope you did go and take chances at meeting new people. But it is OK if you chose not to go at this time, you will have other opportunities. I have my own social anxieties and I go with what I have. You are a strong person and can get through this. It's a difficult situation to be in a new place with no friends but there are good people everywhere to get to know, so you should get to know them. Also, if you find another forum that helps you then join that. You don't have to leave this forum. Just post less often. But don't isolate yourself. Good luck. (I first met you in EP a while back and I believe you were the one with a Latin quote. I can't remember it though.)
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Post by lwoetin on May 5, 2016 15:05:57 GMT -5
This line that he used gets to me. I keep playing it over in my mind. After he said it, I asked him if he was going to tie me up in a chair and keep me hostage. I envision myself as the mom of Norman Bates in Psycho....all dried up....this may be me in the future if I don't get moving! lol I think a little more make up will help the future you. He does a fine job with your hair and teeth though.
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Post by lwoetin on May 4, 2016 13:47:53 GMT -5
I don't think I'll have a bikini body by Memorial Day... Dan you just triggered that awful memory of that dude wearing a bikini posted by islandtime. Stop!! (Your company is very employee friendly. that's awesome.)
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Post by lwoetin on May 3, 2016 0:08:40 GMT -5
I'm very sorry Lexus. Praying for you and your Mom this Mothers Day.
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Running
Apr 30, 2016 1:25:39 GMT -5
Post by lwoetin on Apr 30, 2016 1:25:39 GMT -5
ultra marathons...that's too wild. My body would collapse. I did run this afternoon. Got inspired by your post. Did your H run with you? I would think physical exercise would increase sexual desire.
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Post by lwoetin on Apr 28, 2016 0:14:48 GMT -5
If only, we could have that magically package with pretty on top that graced us with happiness, Joy, Peace, unconditional Love and a nice intimate relationship..... I haven't given up on that dream yet. I would like that package as well. Maybe it need not be a dream. We can dream about fame, fortune and hot women worshiping us. But the package you describe is realistic.
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Post by lwoetin on Apr 27, 2016 23:46:44 GMT -5
Most of the time I'm good. I walk on egg shells. I avoid conflict (I'm horrible with confrontation. I freeze up and people scream at me like I'm stupid). We happily ignore each other and its all good. but some days, are just bad. It seems like its all just too much and I hide in the bathroom and cry. I force myself to not make too much noise so my roommates don't suspect anything and report me. I hope you will have your freedom some day. Your kids need your attention and you are also surrounded by wacky people. It is overwhelming I'm sure. You are free to cry here if you want. We won't report you (to who?).
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Post by lwoetin on Apr 27, 2016 23:10:06 GMT -5
You look great. I haven't been running in a year so I miss it. I like the aerobic exercise and being outdoors. It feels good to sweat and be out of breath. I think my heart and lung need more exercise. If I had a running partner, especially a female, I would run all the time. One time I hid my water bottle behind a shaded tree so I can drink it after running, someone moved it to another tree...young kids playing with me. I'm not sure I can handle running up mountains though, @mountainrunner.
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Post by lwoetin on Apr 26, 2016 23:14:56 GMT -5
Wewbwb - I did take him up on it. Not because he turned me on, but it's nice to know that my body didn't reject him. Now, I'm planning on some 'enhancement' surgery... So, I'm making personal decisions without his input. Maybe that's it. But, no he does not turn me on. That's HORRIBLE to say. But, after years of begging him for sex.... I became numb and lost all desire for him. You begged for sex and now it appears that something bigger is missing. I hope you find it, whether it is with your H or with someone else. Maybe searching...for happiness(?) or peace(?)...is what makes life worth living.
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Post by lwoetin on Apr 26, 2016 21:59:51 GMT -5
But I think I always assumed that somewhere deep down everybody wants intimacy and touch and sex, because that is how I feel. So I assumed that she must feel the same way but somehow be unable to let herself feel it because of her assorted psychological baggage. And so given enough space and encouragement I thought she might work through that stuff and come to be the engaged intimate person I wanted her to. Now I wonder whether I wasn't just refusing to listen to her and actually she is just different from me. And all those assumptions in themselves created a lot of pressure and made her feel like crap because in effect every day I was telling her in subtle ways You're not good enough or You're stunted and repressed. I came to this realization recently too. I have been putting pressure on my wife to change to someone I can be happy with. Last Friday, she said...I already tried. OK now what. I can put so much more pressure to make her reconsider her answer, but then who I am fooling. I may get sex again that way but it wouldn't be really her. Maybe I am at the stage of giving her space and encouragement so she might work through that stuff and come to can be a more engaged intimate person I want her to be on her time frame. Meanwhile I'll be sexless until I am no longer in love with her, or lose my sanity and become a male Craigslist slut.
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