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Post by RexCorvus on Oct 14, 2016 10:33:17 GMT -5
I feel your pain and despair. There is a lot here that reflects my experience as well. I haven't posted my full story yet, but yours resonated deeply with me. I too, over my 20 year SM, cycle through times where I overload myself with work or college and am able to ignore it. Then something happens and it suddenly crashed down upon me.
I'm sorry you are here, but you are among friends. Only those who have experienced a SM can fully understand the soul crushing despair you speak of. I just found this site a few days ago. I was a member of the original EP years ago, and am grateful to have found my old friends. In AA they have a saying "Keep coming back".
RC
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Post by RexCorvus on Oct 14, 2016 10:14:42 GMT -5
#13 – CANCER! I have not posted my full story yet so just for a little background: 20 years sexless marriage. Average frequency most years ~2-4 times a year. When trying to get pregnant 2 times a month when she was ovulating… CANCER! This crosses my mind a lot, especially lately. I am a testicular cancer survivor and I have often wondered if there is a link between low sexual activity and testicular cancer. I was fortunate and caught it very early. Cancer had not spread, so it was completely contained in one testicle. My cancerous testicle was removed, but I still have one remaining. (I’m just a nut, but not nuts) A month ago, overnight my remaining testicle swelled up to the size of a lemon and was very sore. I called my urologist and he found that I had an epididymis infection. You know that tube that stores and carries sperm. A round of antibiotics cleared it up. What was my wife’s first question? What caused that! I was very close to saying, “He said lack of use…” but as all that would cause is a fight that I am past having. I told her I didn’t ask and he didn’t say. It made me wonder though, what does cause this? I looked and the most common causes are STI’s. Obviously you have to be sexually active for that to happen. In men who aren't sexually active, epididymitis can be caused by a nonsexually transmitted bacterial infection. In men with urinary tract or prostate infections, bacteria might spread from the infected site to the epididymis. This lead me to research enlarged prostate and sexual activity. I found that as stated in #13, they are finding that there is a link between low sexual activity and prostate cancer: urology.jhu.edu/newsletter/prostate_cancer712.php“scientists found that men who reported more ejaculations-more than 21 a month, on average across their adult life-had two thirds the lifetime risk of prostate cancer of men who reported fewer (4 to 7) ejaculations a month. Notes Platz: "Compared with men reporting fewer ejaculations per month at all ages, men who reported 21 or ejaculations per month had one-fourth the risk of prostate cancer.” More than 21 ejaculations per month!!! I guess I could “take care of myself” as I do, but we know how much fun that is after years of ONLY that. So 21 times a month, is a stretch (pun intended). In summary not only is my sexless marriage emotionally destroying, it has a higher probability of killing me. RC
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Post by RexCorvus on Oct 14, 2016 9:14:21 GMT -5
Thank you DryCreek!
Nice remodel you have here. I appreciate having a focused site just for ILIASM.
I am kicking the tires, reading others stories, and will post my story with updates.
Thank you again for the welcome! RC
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Post by RexCorvus on Oct 13, 2016 14:31:56 GMT -5
So so glad to have found everyone! I had just "re-joined" EP when *poof* sorry we are shutting it down! I was, a very long time ago, known as InertiaCreeps and then RexCorvus.
Nothing has changed in many ways, but I feel like I am changing. I need to figure this site out.
RC
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Post by RexCorvus on Oct 13, 2016 14:10:31 GMT -5
I am done asking for something that should be given freely.
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