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Post by becca on Dec 11, 2016 10:06:21 GMT -5
'If you're going through hell, keep going.' (Winston Churchill) Tamara, I think you are such a badass. Your situation is extremely difficult, but you're GETTING IT DONE, and I admire you so much for that. KEEP GOING!!! I agree with TBK, you are tough as nails and this too shall pass. The Winston Churchill made me think of this country song. I am attaching some of the lyrics for those that are country music averse! If you're goin' through hell keep on going Don't slow down if you're scared don't show it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there I've been deep down in that darkness I've been down to my last match Felt a hundred different demons breathin' fire down my back And I knew that if I stumbled I'd fall right into the trap That they were layin' But the good news is there's angels everywhere out on the street Holdin' out a hand to pull you back up on your feet The one's that you've been draggin' for so long You're on your knees might as well be prayin' Guess what I'm sayin' If you're goin' through hell keep on going Don't slow down if you're scared don't show it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there When you're goin' through hell keep on movin' Face that fire walk right through it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there
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Post by becca on Dec 10, 2016 22:03:22 GMT -5
CagedTiger: Umm excuse me...what the hell is a 'moon pie'? LOL It's a popular snack dessert treat here in the South a lot like a Little Debbie snack cake. Two round graham crackers, marshmellow-ish filling in-between, all dipped in chocolate. Looks like this: These are strictly in the South? Huh. Someone else told me recently that BC/Goody powders are a Southern thing too. I knew grits and sweet tea were definitely regional but moon pies? I really need to get out more.
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Post by becca on Dec 6, 2016 14:06:02 GMT -5
JonDoe, I can't begin to iimagine the pain that losing your brother caused you. It broke my heart to read your story. I also can't begin to understand your wife going on vacation at that time. It is a level of selfishness that is foreign to me. "And to this day she justifies it as what she needed" That speaks volumes. It is time for you to be selfish and do what YOU need.
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Post by becca on Dec 4, 2016 21:13:42 GMT -5
Seriously. I hate this shit. Can I come stay with any of you Floridians? My daughter went to the beach today here in Georgia. I know, I know...I will refer to your response to DryCreek.
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Post by becca on Dec 4, 2016 21:06:48 GMT -5
Hugs to you lyn. I am so glad that you were able to receive that positive validation. A SM absolutely messes with your head and twists up our thoughts about ourselves.
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Post by becca on Dec 4, 2016 20:52:00 GMT -5
She must've seen something in my expression and asked if I was jealous. I told her the truth; that I was a little. She was upset by this remark, and I found myself falling into my usual routine of reassurance It's interesting because she opened the door by asking if you were jealous. There were two possible answers, yes or no. You chose yes "I was a little". She had to be prepared for that answer. If you said no you would have been lying and more than likely she would have known you were lying. So the fact that she was upset by your answer to the question (answered as honestly and as gently as possibly) seems a little manipulative on her part. I am sure she had no doubt you would back pedal and reassure her that it was all fine. It's unfortunate it couldn't have provoked an honest discussion.
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Post by becca on Dec 4, 2016 20:43:21 GMT -5
Someone can be nice, good, etc. but still not be what you need or want in your life. I am guessing your therapist just wants you out there trying and not throwing up walls but it sounds like you have some solid feedback from your time with him ("...wished he would stop doing just about everything he was doing") and your dream self agreed.
It's just as important to figure out what we don't want and need in a relationship. Now you can make room for the guy who is maybe a combination of complicated AND easy to please AND crazy for you (this part should be non-negotiable!).
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Post by becca on Dec 3, 2016 17:23:54 GMT -5
I can only imagine how difficult this is for you. I am just sorry after all the waiting and postponements that this is how it went. It is going to be so much more costly in the end when you are just wanting what is fair for you, her and the kids. The good news is if you had any doubts at all, her behavior during this entire ordeal should let you know you absolutely made the right decision. For the sake of everyone, I hope it is resolved quickly. Hang in there!
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Post by becca on Dec 1, 2016 10:46:56 GMT -5
Of course I had to google "Rocky Mountain oysters"
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Post by becca on Nov 30, 2016 15:52:21 GMT -5
There's always plenty of blame to go around. Don't beat yourself up over it, wewbwb.
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Post by becca on Nov 30, 2016 15:00:01 GMT -5
I enjoyed the article too. But I still think communication is the linchpin that holds it all together. When issues like ego, shame, loneliness, kids and the others she mentioned surface, clearly communicating with one another about them and cooperating with one another is key to a healthy relationship.
The one about ego, in particular, hit home for me. Thanks for sharing.
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Post by becca on Nov 29, 2016 14:22:02 GMT -5
I am a 9w8. So I suppose that means I am a peacemaker AND a challenger. Weird dichotomy. I suspect as I move forward with my life I will shift to a 2 as well bballgirl. This was fun Chatter Fox. Thanks!
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Post by becca on Nov 28, 2016 20:42:17 GMT -5
This one was stuck in my head all day.
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Post by becca on Nov 28, 2016 20:18:45 GMT -5
I took belly dancing lessons years ago and loved it. I was trying to get a better body roll when I did West Coast Swing and someone suggested trying belly dancing. Don't be intimidated, GG. You take pole dancing lessons! Belly dancing seems easy by comparison and the costumes are fun!
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Post by becca on Nov 28, 2016 17:28:47 GMT -5
I was so confused by this thread and definitely felt like I entered the middle of the conversation. Glad to see I am not crazy!
@geekgoddess, you seriously rock!
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