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Post by csl on Oct 14, 2018 17:02:56 GMT -5
Maybe I should get back into the matchmaking business Yenta? Is that you?
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2018 17:21:39 GMT -5
Maybe I should get back into the matchmaking business Yenta? Is that you? I promise you'll be happy, And even if you're not, There's more to life than that--- Don't ask me what. Chava, I found him. Won't you be a lucky bride! He's handsome, he's tall, That is from side to side. But he's a nice man, a good catch, right? Right. You heard he has a temper. He'll beat you every night, But only when he's sober, So you'll be alright.
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Post by Handy on Oct 14, 2018 18:00:44 GMT -5
Northstarmom, I did the match survey as a divorced male. I was wondering if I was the biggest problem in our M at the time. I was trying to figure out how I differed and was looking for clues so I could fix some things under my control. The test, if you can call it a test, indicated I didn't have that much relationship experience, I had previously worked too much (stay at home mom situation so it was up to me to pay for everything. I had been financially responsible for myself or another person, first my mother than my W, since i was 17 ), I had limited sexual experiences, I didn't go on many vacations, and I was conservative with money.
All my life I tried to do the right things and never was wild or a risk taker, and some people said "how is life in Dullsville." There was no cushion for mistakes in my earlier days. I never bounced a check and never was on unemployment so maybe my work and responsibility ethics had something to do with the 5% compatibility.
The too responsible is in part because my dad died when I was 3 and my mother struggled greatly financially so I didn't have a normal childhood or teenage lifestyle. Then when things were looking better money wise, Uncle Sam decided I needed to be in the US Army at a pay rate of $68 a month, of which I had to send home $40 so my mother could pay the lot rent where her mobile home was parked. This Family of Origin (FOO) stuff affects some people greatly.
At one time, I also bought into being a dedicate Baptist but have since discovered several things in the Bible do not jive with physics so now I am an agnostic and read or watch videos pertaining to science and how things really work, as is known currently. My latest endeavor is astrophysics. The last couple of days I watched and read about Neutrinos and super novas. For practical purposes I also read or watched videos about "Hydraulic Dam Construction back in the earlier 1900 to the 1950's. Not the best method to build a safe and stable dam.
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Post by northstarmom on Oct 14, 2018 19:21:13 GMT -5
Handy, you sound like the type of man that would be a good match for several of my friends ages 50-54. I don’t know why you didn’t match more on Maych unless you were hoping for a woman in her early 20s. I don’t know many women who are at least 40 who are looking for players or guys doing wild and crazy things. You sound responsible, trustworthy and intelligent. I don’t know any mature woman who’s looking for a financially or otherwise irresponsible man or a man who takes stupid risks.
My women friends are attractive, intelligent, have at minimum master’s degrees and are well read and can hold their end in an intelligent conversation. . They also own their own homes, have professional jobs and are involved in activities like hiking, astronomy, Jaya king, running, painting, travel, and acting. If a guy had it before participated in their interests they’d be willing to introduce him. And all enjoy sex.
Not trying to matchmake . Just letting you know that there definitely are women who’d find you very appealing.
You might meet a good match by taking classes or going to lectures in subjects that interest you or by going to meetups in things that interest you, maybe there’s an astronomy meetup in your area or the local museum offers science presentations.
In my area I’ve also noticed that guys similar to you participate in contra dancing, which is similar to square dancing. I know two women who in midlife met their husbands there. Their guys seem similar to you: responsible, well read sorta nerdy.
Match simply may not be the best way for you to meet partners.
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Post by Handy on Oct 14, 2018 20:41:53 GMT -5
I used to Square Dance. My W wanted to go but like other things, she lost interest once there was any real learning required. I kept going for the next 2 years and started on a 3rd year. I started to like my 20 year younger main partner and also got a cold that was so bad, my nose ran all the time and I didn't want to infect anyone else. Six weeks later I knew if I went back I might make a fool of myself with my previous dance partner. I was married and she wasn't. I know she liked me as a dance partner from what other dancers said but romantically, who knows. There are a couple of local dance groups but they want couples, not singles. I have gone to several meet-up and lectures and talk to women. Maybe I don't pick upon the interest clues. I also probably have too much honor ability (marriage ethics) in me to to advance much beyond simple friends stage. I live in a city but outside the city there isn't much for 50 miles in several directions so I take in what is available in a limited supply. I have no desire for a much younger woman, so that wasn't a factor in the 5% match. About my age, well I have been eligible for Medicare for a long time. I also would never want any woman's money and I don't want to be a "sugar daddy." Your friends are about 20 years younger than I am. I am guessing I wouldn't be of much interest to them because of the age differences. Like you said at my introduction, being married is a road block to any romantic relationship, but that wasn't in the relationship match questionnaire where I scored a 5% compatibility.
Thank you for the information about recreational and how to meet people. I will look into some of the suggestions.
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Post by northstarmom on Oct 15, 2018 10:54:19 GMT -5
Handy, Consider moving to a senior apartment building or community. There will be plenty of horny, bored,discrete women your age to whom you'd be a catch. From what I've heard, due to the lack of men in such communities, women are used to man sharing. And, honestly, what is your wife going to do if after 50 years, you fool around? Do you really think she'd divorce you at both of your ages with so much history? I have friends -- mid 70s married 51 years. About 6 years ago, the formerly very manly husband (he is an Air Force vet who spent 10 years sailing around the world with his wife in their boat) decided to become a cross dresser. He is 6'6 and now typically dresses as a woman-- full make-up, wig, dress. His wife hates it but won't leave him. She even goes out with his being attired as a woman. She said that after 51 years, she doesn't want to disrupt their family.
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Post by Handy on Oct 15, 2018 13:24:51 GMT -5
NSM Consider moving to a senior apartment building or community. There will be plenty of horny, bored,discrete women your age to whom you'd be a catch. From what I've heard, due to the lack of men in such communities, women are used to man sharing.
That sounds like a winner. I have usually had the idea I needed my own place because of all of the things I fix. There are several senior apartments in town. I read about "The Villages" in Florida and even looked at some house prices. I know of several widows that live alone and talk to them. None seem interested in much more than friends or me fixing things. I will admit to not picking up on clues. I missed some clues to a 77 yr old lady while I was running errands. She was extra chatty for a while then decided she/we needed to go to the next destination. This woman looked like, acted like and sounded like she was 65. If I met her again, I would dig deeper and listen more.
The cross-dresser story would be a bit much for me if I was a woman. I am more binary. The 10 years sailing around the world, now that is something I would like to read about.
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Post by saarinista on Oct 17, 2018 2:25:28 GMT -5
NSM Consider moving to a senior apartment building or community. There will be plenty of horny, bored,discrete women your age to whom you'd be a catch. From what I've heard, due to the lack of men in such communities, women are used to man sharing.That sounds like a winner. I have usually had the idea I needed my own place because of all of the things I fix. There are several senior apartments in town. I read about "The Villages" in Florida and even looked at some house prices. I know of several widows that live alone and talk to them. None seem interested in much more than friends or me fixing things. I will admit to not picking up on clues. I missed some clues to a 77 yr old lady while I was running errands. She was extra chatty for a while then decided she/we needed to go to the next destination. This woman looked like, acted like and sounded like she was 65. If I met her again, I would dig deeper and listen more. The cross-dresser story would be a bit much for me if I was a woman. I am more binary. The 10 years sailing around the world, now that is something I would like to read about. Having lived in Florida many years ago, i have to say i detest senior communities. the condo boards are peopled with control freaks and i like living around people of different ages, not an artificially segregated group. but, thats just me. you could always just troll the pool parties there! 😉
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Post by northstarmom on Oct 17, 2018 7:11:27 GMT -5
If you move to the Villages get condoms. I’ve read it had one of the highest std rated in the state.
“LADY LAKE, Fla. – It’s 11 p.m. at the Bourbon Street Bar, and Roselyn’s gyrating her hips to the blues band, Sue’s sipping a cocktail and flirting with her new boyfriend, and Alan is scanning the crowd for cute girls.
“See those two?” a buxom blonde asks, pointing to an elegant couple at the bar. “They were caught having sex in their golf cart a few weeks ago. It happens a lot!” Welcome to ground zero for geriatrics who are seriously getting it on.
It’s a Thursday night at one of a half-dozen hot spots at the 20,000-acre Central Florida complex called The Villages, the largest gated retirement community in America – and one of the most popular destinations for New Yorkers in their golden years – where the female-to-male ratio runs 10 to 1....
“I get offers for sex all the time,” brags Dave, 70, who, like others who spoke about their sexually active set, asked that his real name not be used, “especially by women in their 70s. They say, ‘Are you busy tonight? I’ll show you a good time.’ ”
One overly charming lady-killer known as “Mr. Midnight” boasted of one of his conquests last year: “Absolutely beautiful. I’ve had her a few times. She comes over, takes a shower, jumps in bed, and then gets dressed and leaves. She’s simply the best.”
I couldn’t paste the link but this is from The NY Post, 1/25/2009
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Post by Handy on Oct 17, 2018 10:39:08 GMT -5
OH, yea NSM, I read about the STDs and a little about the nite/sex life. I am 2K miles away from the area so I probably won't move there but the ratio of M to FM was interesting. I suppose it could be similar but on a smaller scale in other places, even in my small city.
Of the older women I personally know, they only want someone to do a few activities together. Most-all want their own space and mostly their own time schedules. Non seem like they want anything more, except me fixing things.
Unlike Mr Midnight, I want one partner. I know friends are important too because overly relying on one partner to satisfy all needs is rarely possible. My friends in the investment club, yoga, biking, and a few other activities fills some of my interests and desires. When it comes to romance,intimacy or sex, all I want is a solo dedicated partner.
Saarinista, I lived in a mobile home park over 50 years ago. There were rules galore. I have friends in a condo association, more rules, some good, some controlling in nature. I have always wanted not to have to live in the cookie-cutter rule groups.
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