|
|
Post by Rhapsodee on Jun 24, 2016 11:07:11 GMT -5
Yesterday was my birthday. Hub offered to bring home Thai food. We always get mild yellow coconut curry with chicken and vegetables which we split because it is too much food for one person. It is light and delicious. While I was dividing the food I noticed that it was thicker and oilier and smelled different. It was so spicy I could barely eat it. He commented that it was extra good this evening. I asked if he had told them that we wanted mild and he said no, they didn't ask and he didn't think to tell them. The first time ever. And on my birthday. I was starving from my workout, so ate it.
My birthday gift. I want a Fitbit. Costco has the one I want with an extra band thrown in. He did a dramatic demonstration of ordering it. He had me sit next to him while he scanned through. He refused to get me the Costco one because he doesn't think I need an extra band. He paid $10 more for one from another site with no extras. Then, he put the icing on the cake by lecturing me that I am a 2%'er and that mainstream people don't have such things. It is frivolous and a trinket but because it's my birthday, I can have one. He says my expectations are too high and I should realize that I need to stop pushing my body so hard. He says I need to slow down and accept that I'm getting older. F' that!
He asks me what I want, then he decides what I'm going to get. I wanted a Windows pro laptop for Christmas to replace the dead computer. He gets me this HUGE HP touch screen thing that I can't move anywhere. I wanted a little portable iPhone speaker, I show him which one, but he gets me a huge ihome speaker that is hard to move. These are better, he says.
The lease is up on my car. I like my little hybrid, I want another one just like it. I chose this car and stood firm that it was what I wanted. He finds every single fault about it and vocalizes. He wants me to get an electric car. Here we go again.
I'm from Dallas. He's always talking about how stupid Texans are, how much he hates Texas. Oh, no not me just the other Texans.
|
|
|
|
Post by DryCreek on Jun 24, 2016 11:16:35 GMT -5
Rhapsodee grabs giant rubber stamp and plants one on his forehead with indelible ink... "Reject!"
"Next!"
In a different context, one might argue he was trying to put some thought into the process and get you something better. But in these examples, it's pretty clear he just wants to impose his opinion on you.
|
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Jun 24, 2016 11:27:40 GMT -5
All material stuff! Where's the love in any of that?
Did you feel,
Cherished?
Wanted.?
Desired?
Chased?
Sought after?
Was there any adventure to share?
Was your beauty unveiled?
Sounds like the ideal birthday by the controlling husbands standards. As little as possible, and all on his terms. ( I can relate!)
|
|
|
|
Post by Rhapsodee on Jun 24, 2016 11:34:08 GMT -5
All material stuff! Where's the love in any of that? Did you feel, Cherished? Wanted.? Desired? Chased? Sought after? Was there any adventure to share? Was your beauty unveiled? Sounds like the ideal birthday by the controlling husbands standards. As little as possible, and all on his terms. ( I can relate!) No No No No No No No No |
|
|
|
Post by JMX on Jun 24, 2016 11:36:02 GMT -5
Ha! greatcoastal - I am getting a kick out of "was your beauty unveiled?" Lolz. |
|
|
|
Post by Rhapsodee on Jun 24, 2016 11:45:10 GMT -5
Rhapsodee grabs giant rubber stamp and plants one on his forehead with indelible ink... "Reject!" "Next!" In a different context, one might argue he was trying to put some thought into the process and get you something better. But in these examples, it's pretty clear he just wants to impose his opinion on you. "I get you a computer and you never use it". Well, you try sitting at that little desk on that hard chair in front of something the size of a billboard that takes up nearly the entire surface of the desk. "I get you speakers and you never use them." I move from room to room, which means I have to pick the thing up and move it, find a place to set it near an outlet. I use my headset instead. He's brilliant in some ways, but with me, he always goes to the extreme and doesn't think about the practicality of my requests.he thinks I'm doing the cheap. If it doesn't work for me I can't use it. |
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Jun 24, 2016 12:01:07 GMT -5
Ha! greatcoastal - I am getting a kick out of "was your beauty unveiled?" Lolz. That list is from the book "Wild at Heart". I want to share this page with you ( and others) for me it sounds spot on! And finally,every woman wants to have a beauty to unveil. Not to conjure, but to unveil. Most women feel the pressure to be beautiful from very young, but that is not what I speak of. There is also a deep desire to simply and truly BE the beauty, and be delighted in. Most little girls will remember playing dress up, or wedding day, or " twirling skirts", those flowing dresses that were perfect for spinning around in. she'll put her pretty dress on come into the living room and twirl. What she longs for is to capture her daddy's delight. My wife remembers standing on top of of the coffee table as a girl of five or six, and singing her heart out. DO YOU SEE ME? asks the heart of every girl. AND ARE YOU CAPTIVATED BY WHAT YOU SEE? The world kills a woman's heart when it tells her to be tough, efficient, and independent. Sadly, Christianity has missed her heart as well. Walk into most churches in America, have a look around, and ask yourself this question; What is a Christian woman? Again, don't listen to what is said, look at what you find there. There is no doubt about it. You'd have to admit a Christian women is......tired. All we've offered the feminine soul is pressure to" be a good servant." No one is fighting for her heart; there is no grand adventure to be swept up in; and every woman doubts very much that she has any beauty to unveil. |
|
|
|
Post by cc on Jun 24, 2016 13:15:57 GMT -5
Ha! greatcoastal - I am getting a kick out of "was your beauty unveiled?" Lolz. That list is from the book "Wild at Heart". I want to share this page with you ( and others) for me it sounds spot on! And finally,every woman wants to have a beauty to unveil. Not to conjure, but to unveil. Most women feel the pressure to be beautiful from very young, but that is not what I speak of. There is also a deep desire to simply and truly BE the beauty, and be delighted in. Most little girls will remember playing dress up, or wedding day, or " twirling skirts", those flowing dresses that were perfect for spinning around in. she'll put her pretty dress on come into the living room and twirl. What she longs for is to capture her daddy's delight. My wife remembers standing on top of of the coffee table as a girl of five or six, and singing her heart out. DO YOU SEE ME? asks the heart of every girl. AND ARE YOU CAPTIVATED BY WHAT YOU SEE? The world kills a woman's heart when it tells her to be tough, efficient, and independent. Sadly, Christianity has missed her heart as well. Walk into most churches in America, have a look around, and ask yourself this question; What is a Christian woman? Again, don't listen to what is said, look at what you find there. There is no doubt about it. You'd have to admit a Christian women is......tired. All we've offered the feminine soul is pressure to" be a good servant." No one is fighting for her heart; there is no grand adventure to be swept up in; and every woman doubts very much that she has any beauty to unveil. I ugly cried through that entire book! I purchased the companion book for men and he didn't read it. I did, trying to be helpful. |
|
|
|
Post by cc on Jun 24, 2016 13:16:52 GMT -5
As for the fitbit. I love mine. Here's to stopping my depression eating and lose this weight again.
|
|
|
|
Post by unmatched on Jun 24, 2016 15:16:35 GMT -5
Do you think that by allowing him to buy all this stuff for you, rather than taking the money and buying it yourself, you might be undermining your position in the relationship and giving you both the message that his decision is the one that counts? And that his opinions therefore carry more weight.
|
|
|
|
Post by wewbwb on Jun 24, 2016 15:57:07 GMT -5
rhapsodee "Then, he put the icing on the cake by lecturing me that I am a 2%'er and that mainstream people don't have such things. It is frivolous and a trinket but because it's my birthday, I can have one. He says my expectations are too high and I should realize that."
What's the point in being a 2% er if you can't enjoy it? But I see his point about "low expectations" because that always serves people well - "Aim low" everyone says. Now let me guess. Wait for it....... He's really smart. 
|
|
|
|
Post by DryCreek on Jun 24, 2016 16:19:21 GMT -5
What's the point in being a 2% er if you can't enjoy it? Money is just a tool. What's the point in having tools that you don't use? |
|
|
|
Post by wewbwb on Jun 24, 2016 16:26:59 GMT -5
What's the point in being a 2% er if you can't enjoy it? Money is just a tool. What's the point in having tools that you don't use? I have a tool that doesn't get used.  |
|
|
|
Post by DryCreek on Jun 24, 2016 16:46:16 GMT -5
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2016 16:58:06 GMT -5
So on your birthday, he got you food that you couldn't eat, and gave you a condescending lecture.
Am I wrong?
[And, happy birthday a day late. Too bad we couldn't party together! I guarantee you would have had more fun!]
|
|
