People getting sick of you

I seem to have this problem, and I would love it if I knew why.

My ex tired of me after we'd been together about 6 years. He started staying out super late at night, drinking, smoking pot, and withholding sex.

My current husband I guess decided he was kind of done with me once I got pregnant - though we started having issues at about 3 years into our relationship (I didn't respond as strongly to a world event as he would have liked).

My friends do this too. They are all about hanging out and whatnot, then, after a few years, it's like they have no use for me anymore (the exceptions being my few closest friends).

Any ideas? I don't ignore people. I respond quickly to texts, etc (maybe that's the problem?), and I will drop anything to be there for someone.

Maybe I come on too strong? Or they decide I'm too quirky?

One of the things my husband is always telling me is that I come across as "cold" and somewhat "calculating". Also self-absorbed.

Just wondering if anyone knows what I'm talking a lot or can shed a light.