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Post by beachguy on Oct 16, 2016 14:14:00 GMT -5
Asexuality, intimacy aversion general, intimacy aversion specific to you. All as good a "whys" as any other. And, all the "whys" end up with a common consequence to you, the refused spouse. Disenfranchisement. - And your road out of disenfranchisement is the same, irrespective of the "why". Which I carefully acknowledged when I started this. But it's a fact that 2nd marriages have a higher failure rate than 1st marriages. And 3rd marriages have an even higher failure rate than 2nd marriages (something like 70%!!!). It is obvious that most people don't learn from their mistakes. I suspect most people subconsciously keep picking the same personality profile that got them into so much trouble the first time...
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Post by csl on Oct 16, 2016 18:40:12 GMT -5
Asexuality, intimacy aversion general, intimacy aversion specific to you. All as good a "whys" as any other. And, all the "whys" end up with a common consequence to you, the refused spouse. Disenfranchisement. - And your road out of disenfranchisement is the same, irrespective of the "why". Which I carefully acknowledged when I started this. But it's a fact that 2nd marriages have a higher failure rate than 1st marriages. And 3rd marriages have an even higher failure rate than 2nd marriages (something like 70%!!!). It is obvious that most people don't learn from their mistakes. I suspect most people subconsciously keep picking the same personality profile that got them into so much trouble the first time... This proves the truth of "no matter where you go there you are." Most think that a new spouse will be different, but if they bring the old self into the marriage, they are bringing 50% of the problems from their old marriage into the new one.
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Post by baza on Oct 16, 2016 18:43:11 GMT -5
I think that where you say - "It is obvious that most people don't learn from their mistakes" - is (generally) correct Brother beachguy. - However, I think that in this group, the instances where people DO learn from their mistakes is higher than the 'general' level. - There are plenty of examples of members who are learning or have learned these costly lessons, you can see it in reading their full run of stories to see the learning and changes in thinking in action. JMX, GeekGoddess (formerly GrantGeek), bbgirl, greatcoastal, NYartgal, to name just a handful.
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Post by thefullmoon on Oct 18, 2016 16:55:49 GMT -5
............. so tonight just ask the question " why wont you fuck me" and post your response The answer is obvious and always the same..."because I don't want to..." unless the person is completely paralised and not capable ...
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