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Post by JMX on May 19, 2019 23:42:10 GMT -5
My h’s t-shots are working. In the morning, I get regularly woken up by morning wood.
Usually, I don’t complain. I like it.
However... my needs are still not met. I am Being patient and giving it time. However! This morning I got an invitation which I politely declined. I am on my period (tmi) and I know how he is about that. So, in the interest of preserving it - I declined.
He asked for a BJ.
And I couldn’t help myself.
“Men who go down, get blowies. I know I have given you head to precipitate sex, but you don’t get a free one when I can’t get off. It’s been since 2009.”
Those that remember EP - that was my horrifying 70s bush moment. I wasn’t expecting it and stopped grooming.
Honestly - the frequency has picked up. The lack of regard for me has not.
So, another sad, sad update.
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Post by baza on May 20, 2019 1:08:31 GMT -5
Yeah, over the whole history (back in to the old EP) it reads like your spouse was a pretty selfish bloke, financially irresponsible and didn't want to root you. Now, he is a pretty selfish bloke, financially irresponsible, but does want to root you - albeit on his timetable and in a manner of his choosing, that doesn't seem to pay much mind to what you might like.
Under one scenario you didn't have a lover. Under the other, you have a selfish lover.
I guess it's a value call on which is "better" or "worse" than the other. Neither seem to be terribly appealing.
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 5:12:42 GMT -5
JMX, reading your experience made me pissed at your h’s selfishness. You deserve better but it may not be possible to get it from him.
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Post by hopingforachange on May 20, 2019 5:40:09 GMT -5
It's good that you drew the line. Now he knows if he wants BJ's then he needs to munch the muffin. Just because it's HL people want sex, it doesn't mean the LL partner gets to take advantage of our desires.
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 5:48:26 GMT -5
Whenever there is a major change in a family — a birth, move, death, retirement, etc. there is an opportunity to set new boundaries and expectations, JMX’s h’s getting t shots that boost his libido is one such opportunity, and JMX is taking good advantage of it by letting him know what she needs when it comes to sex. She can be even clearer that one sided sex isn’t something that she will participate in whether or not she’s on her period.
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Post by ironhamster on May 20, 2019 5:56:44 GMT -5
Regarding your needs, I am not sure what the gap is but not surprised there is one.
If he nuts too quickly, Viagra and Cialis are also effective for reducing premature ejaculation. I know some kinky tricks also that make it hard for a man to finish early.
This is tmi back at you. As for the 70's bush and menstral blood, it's not an issue to some guys as long as it's not a discomfort to you. I am sure that makes me a pervert to some people, but, yes, I am a pervert so we'll just leave it at that.
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Post by isthisit on May 20, 2019 7:42:39 GMT -5
It's good that you drew the line. Now he knows if he wants BJ's then he needs to munch the muffin. Just because it's HL people want sex, it doesn't mean the LL partner gets to take advantage of our desires. ‘Munch the muffin’ 🤣🤣🤣. Oh yes that’s now in my vocabulary. Be nice to have cause to use it of course. Agree with the sentiment too. My H befitted massively from my HL as he has what (little) he wanted whenever he wanted.
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Post by h on May 20, 2019 8:53:47 GMT -5
Regarding your needs, I am not sure what the gap is but not surprised there is one. If he nuts too quickly, Viagra and Cialis are also effective for reducing premature ejaculation. I know some kinky tricks also that make it hard for a man to finish early. This is tmi back at you. As for the 70's bush and menstral blood, it's not an issue to some guys as long as it's not a discomfort to you. I am sure that makes me a pervert to some people, but, yes, I am a pervert so we'll just leave it at that. I'll second that. I have no issue with the period and having sex. I wouldn't do any muffin munching, but there's no taste buds on my penis so no problem. Same preference for bush. Doesn't bother me during sex, but I don't care for hair in my mouth. Trimmed is fine with me, but if I get a long hair down my throat and start coughing and hacking, it's going to be a mood killer.
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Post by sadkat on May 20, 2019 9:13:52 GMT -5
ironhamster- I had to laugh at your post. Pervert or not, I’m learning a whole lot from you so please carry on being you! My opinion is- if a guy’s only goal when having sex is to get off, it won’t be enjoyable for his partner, regardless of how long he can hold off. Enjoyable sex is a two way street.
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Post by hopingforachange on May 20, 2019 10:01:51 GMT -5
I'll add some TMI. Sex while on your period can also speed your period up. The contractions from orgasm, help flush everything out, just be prepaid for a heavier flow for the next few hours. My w would use it to speed the process along, back before changing pill types.The blood doesn't bother me, we put down a towel or changed the sheets afterwords.
Also, the bush shouldn't stop someone that's what's to munch your muffin. It wouldn't bother me, although I prefer shaved or waxed. It would bother me if your bush was so big that I couldn't look up to see your face. Seeing the enjoyment and pleasure is a big part of me enjoying giving.
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Post by workingonit on May 20, 2019 10:08:26 GMT -5
Regarding your needs, I am not sure what the gap is but not surprised there is one. If he nuts too quickly, Viagra and Cialis are also effective for reducing premature ejaculation. I know some kinky tricks also that make it hard for a man to finish early. This is tmi back at you. As for the 70's bush and menstral blood, it's not an issue to some guys as long as it's not a discomfort to you. I am sure that makes me a pervert to some people, but, yes, I am a pervert so we'll just leave it at that. We love your perverted self so no worries😉
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Post by Handy on May 20, 2019 13:25:26 GMT -5
JMX that was my horrifying 70s bush moment. I wasn’t expecting it and stopped grooming.
Bush looks normal to me so no problem.
My W didn't like period sex so I was OK waiting. She didn't like me going down on her or me, so that was also OK with me. I was a hands and kissing man and PIV was great at one time.
Bush VS bare, give me bush with some trimming. Total bush if the sex is good, that is perfectly OK with me.
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Post by greatcoastal on May 20, 2019 13:44:58 GMT -5
"The lack of regard for you" sounds typical in the SM. How much the lack of trust and disrespect spills over into all other aspects of the relationship ,is also a whole nother problem to consider in the marriage. I hope for you JMX that these "tribulations" can be a thankful experience for you in the future.
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Post by Deleted on May 20, 2019 18:15:04 GMT -5
I never thought about this. Asexual and a selfish prick vs. Horny selfish prick. I guess if you have to be housemates with a selfish prick, then asexual is probably better.
Two thumbs up for both the phrase "70s bush" and having one. Both are sexy.
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Post by bballgirl on May 20, 2019 18:19:55 GMT -5
Good for you sticking up for yourself and drawing your line in the sand. Nothing wrong with him getting rejected and a taste of his own medicine too. I wouldn’t give him a bj until he gives you orgasmic oral what’s fair is fair! Hugs
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