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Post by unmatched on Aug 21, 2017 0:08:49 GMT -5
I have been away for a while so trying to catch up. Reading all your posts, I keep getting a sense that you are telling one story after another where you are caught up in some kind of dysfunctional dynamic with your husband. He comes across as a messed up 12 year old with ADHD and emotional issues combined with a complete lack of responsibility for anything. And you come across as ? ? ? Honestly I don't know. What do you want? What kind of life do you want? What kind of relationships do you want? You seem to be putting all your attention on other people, hoping they will reflect back to you who you are and how worthy you are or aren't as a person. But I never got a sense from within you that you have a strong sense of yourself and what you want. Maybe you could try and write a new post that is all about you and what you have to give to the world? You might discover a whole new mypaintbrushes  OK, message received. I will stop sharing. That wasn't the message I was trying to give. I was trying to get to know you a little better and to find out what you want from your relationship and what you want from your marriage. I really believe that if you can find your own heart and your own voice in all this that it will make it so much easier for you to navigate the emotional turmoil of being in a relationship with a 5 year old. That is what I was trying to say. |
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Post by mypaintbrushes on Aug 21, 2017 0:26:09 GMT -5
OK, message received. I will stop sharing. That wasn't the message I was trying to give. I was trying to get to know you a little better and to find out what you want from your relationship and what you want from your marriage. I really believe that if you can find your own heart and your own voice in all this that it will make it so much easier for you to navigate the emotional turmoil of being in a relationship with a 5 year old. That is what I was trying to say. Thank you for clarifying. That does make me feel somewhat better. Unfortunately, being in an abusive situation that is not easy to leave, you tend to hear, " Jusf leave. OMG. Why don't you just leave him? WTF? Are you stupid?? JUST LEAVE." You feel so alone. Completely useless. I wanted anyone breezing through who may be in my situation to recognize that they are NOT alone. Anyone whose sole issue is a sexless marriage is extremely lucky in my book. |
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Post by baza on Aug 21, 2017 0:37:28 GMT -5
I would suggest that within this group, you do NOT tend to hear - "Jusf leave. OMG. Why don't you just leave him? WTF? Are you stupid?? JUST LEAVE."
But it would be true to say that you hear - "Leaving is a perfectly legitimate choice", and suggestions as to how you might advance that choice (see a lawyer etc) if thats the way you want to go.
I would gravely doubt that anyone in here would say that the leaving choice is anything other than difficult and painful.
Also, as you suggest, it is rarely just the sex that is the main issue in these situations.
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Post by hopingforachange on Aug 28, 2017 8:36:01 GMT -5
It would be hard for us to say " Jusf leave. OMG. Why don't you just leave him? WTF? Are you stupid?? JUST LEAVE." when we are the ones still married and in the same situation. It would be the pot calling the kettle black. We know how hard it is and how screwed up the situation makes our minds work against us. We want to help you pull the wool off of your own eyes. But if you want to vent, vent away.
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Post by ladytjb on Dec 4, 2017 21:22:54 GMT -5
MPB, do you realize that Siri translated "husband," to, "has been?" Oh my God, that is ironic! That’s what I thought too! Lol |
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