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Post by WindSister on Apr 24, 2017 9:47:07 GMT -5
So -- we had tickets to Telsa, Poison, Def Leppard Friday night. I have so been looking forward to this concert! Tesla is my alltime favorite band, but they were only the opening band here, so they didn't get all the bells and whistles (didn't need them, they are solid, hard-core, still awesome). We had so much fun. I recall concerts with my ex - we wouldn't touch. Wouldn't swing or sway. He said, "everyone enjoys music differently." His way of "enjoying music" was standing or sitting there like a statue, "listening." That's not my way. I get excited. I get INTO it. (Whether I am drinking or not). Anyway, we had a BLAST; sang, danced, kissed, on our feet all through all three bands. Normally not ones to have our phones out at all, we were coerced into taking one selfie - the couple next to us made us do it "You guys must take a selfie and put it on facebook." We had told them we don't do that stuff - but caved to their peer pressure. lol I guess a few minutes later a friend of ours on FB sent us both a message saying, "look at the back of your section" but we didn't get the message until the next morning because we didn't look at our phones again. So I talked with her a bit and apologized for being snobs, not seeing her. She said she tried to get our attention but we were having too much fun. Then she said, "I was so jealous of you two, actually, and XXX and I got in a huge fight because we don't have FUN anymore." YIKES! But, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. I just told her I was sorry and I hope they can work it out. But, yes -- we really do have fun together. We enjoy things the same way. We are compatible, it's not always a struggle, a fight, an argument, someone being left disappointed, etc, etc and on and on and ON...... GOD, I HATED concerts with my ex -- his way of attempting affection at the end was leaning on me like I was a fence post, his elbow on my shoulder (he was 6'4, I'm 5'6). It makes me shudder just thinking about it... I remember longing to be that couple who was in arm in arm, singing, loving, having fun. Now I am.  We also had a hot tub in our room, which led to a fun, private after party that lasted till wee hours of the morning.... we were a little embarrassed walking out of our room the next morning on our way to the continental breakfast because it wasn't a quiet party by any stretch. Anyway -- what's worse? Pain of staying the same, or pain of taking that step to a more fulfilling life? Know yourself. Know what you want. Figure that stuff out and go for it. |
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Post by wewbwb on Apr 24, 2017 12:39:29 GMT -5
So -- we had tickets to Telsa, Poison, Def Leppard Friday night. <-------Jealous <-------More Jealous |
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Post by WindSister on Apr 24, 2017 12:50:33 GMT -5
I am sorry. I swear I don't share to make anyone jealous but I am STILL in such awe of the life I am living, it makes me cry big ole fat tears of gratitude (still). It just feels good to be able to talk about it with those who might get it. If you can catch them touring right now I HIGHLY recommend it. Poison was reunited so CC was there (that excited me) and they stole the show, honestly. Brett doesn't let the crowd just sit. Go. See a great concert. |
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Post by wewbwb on Apr 24, 2017 13:03:05 GMT -5
Please don't think twice about it. I - personally- enjoy the stories and they motive me.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2017 14:41:31 GMT -5
I am sorry. I swear I don't share to make anyone jealous but I am STILL in such awe of the life I am living, it makes me cry big ole fat tears of gratitude (still). It just feels good to be able to talk about it with those who might get it. If you can catch them touring right now I HIGHLY recommend it. Poison was reunited so CC was there (that excited me) and they stole the show, honestly. Brett doesn't let the crowd just sit. Go. See a great concert. I don't want to take it away from you - not at all! I'm glad you're happy. I just wish there was something like this for me, too. I wish there was a good word to describe this feeling. "Jealous" doesn't really fit. |
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Post by wewbwb on Apr 24, 2017 14:43:42 GMT -5
Envious?
Wistfully pining for the same?
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Post by misssunnybunny on Apr 24, 2017 16:56:53 GMT -5
WindSister , your stories about your new relationship always make me smile, and feel hopeful for the future. Thank you so much for sharing such wonderfully positive experiences. Helps me feel there is hope for a happy relationship in the future.
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Post by merrygoround on Apr 25, 2017 0:24:42 GMT -5
I am sorry. I swear I don't share to make anyone jealous but I am STILL in such awe of the life I am living, it makes me cry big ole fat tears of gratitude (still). It just feels good to be able to talk about it with those who might get it. If you can catch them touring right now I HIGHLY recommend it. Poison was reunited so CC was there (that excited me) and they stole the show, honestly. Brett doesn't let the crowd just sit. Go. See a great concert. I think it's wonderful! And i love hearing about the positives of a major life change. Grab it with both hands! x |
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Post by seabr33z3 on Apr 25, 2017 8:32:43 GMT -5
So -- we had tickets to Telsa, Poison, Def Leppard Friday night. I have so been looking forward to this concert! Tesla is my alltime favorite band, but they were only the opening band here, so they didn't get all the bells and whistles (didn't need them, they are solid, hard-core, still awesome). We had so much fun. I recall concerts with my ex - we wouldn't touch. Wouldn't swing or sway. He said, "everyone enjoys music differently." His way of "enjoying music" was standing or sitting there like a statue, "listening." That's not my way. I get excited. I get INTO it. (Whether I am drinking or not). Anyway, we had a BLAST; sang, danced, kissed, on our feet all through all three bands. Normally not ones to have our phones out at all, we were coerced into taking one selfie - the couple next to us made us do it "You guys must take a selfie and put it on facebook." We had told them we don't do that stuff - but caved to their peer pressure. lol I guess a few minutes later a friend of ours on FB sent us both a message saying, "look at the back of your section" but we didn't get the message until the next morning because we didn't look at our phones again. So I talked with her a bit and apologized for being snobs, not seeing her. She said she tried to get our attention but we were having too much fun. Then she said, "I was so jealous of you two, actually, and XXX and I got in a huge fight because we don't have FUN anymore." YIKES! But, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. I just told her I was sorry and I hope they can work it out. But, yes -- we really do have fun together. We enjoy things the same way. We are compatible, it's not always a struggle, a fight, an argument, someone being left disappointed, etc, etc and on and on and ON...... GOD, I HATED concerts with my ex -- his way of attempting affection at the end was leaning on me like I was a fence post, his elbow on my shoulder (he was 6'4, I'm 5'6). It makes me shudder just thinking about it... I remember longing to be that couple who was in arm in arm, singing, loving, having fun. Now I am. We also had a hot tub in our room, which led to a fun, private after party that lasted till wee hours of the morning.... we were a little embarrassed walking out of our room the next morning on our way to the continental breakfast because it wasn't a quiet party by any stretch. Anyway -- what's worse? Pain of staying the same, or pain of taking that step to a more fulfilling life? Know yourself. Know what you want. Figure that stuff out and go for it. Even way back at the start if I was with my H at any function or wedding or concert or anything we never had much interaction or basic intimacy. I remember the feelings I had at a wedding when I wanted to say something quietly to my H and I inclined my head towards his. Instead of leaning down and in when reading my body language( or not) and hearing me start to whisper( general chat nothing else), he sat rigid. I remember the humiliation I felt. Such a small thing but it was like a slap in the face. As I looked around and saw couples interacting, heads together I was overwhelmed with sadness at that disconnect. I like to be reminded that normal exists. |
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Post by WindSister on Apr 25, 2017 9:04:02 GMT -5
seabr33z3 - Yes, I get that. That was us. My ex got rigid when I put my hand on his back once when we were dating so I don't know what made me think he would ever change or be loving or intimate. I feel really bad for the ones who had what I have now with my now-husband and then lost it over time or their spouse changed, shut off. THAT would be even more devastating. If my now-husband suddenly shut off, oh man -- just, no. But, yeah, I had an inkling with my ex, but for whatever reason I didn't listen. Which tells me I married for reasons other than LOVE. I settled, plain and simple. (as harsh as that sounds) When I met my husband we both vowed "no settling." Neither of us wanted to be with someone just to be with someone. Well, we aren't together just to be together. It's a subtle but very powerful difference to be with someone because you LOVE them and they LOVE you back. It takes work, though, too -- that's the part we will see about, if we last over time. It takes choosing this person everyday and looking at them with love and appreciation. You can't let that get stale or take it for granted or it would end up like many married couples sex life, a withered old abandoned plant, dying in a dark, cold basement. It takes constant nurturing even when it's true love.
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Post by cagedtiger on Apr 25, 2017 9:25:30 GMT -5
So -- we had tickets to Telsa, Poison, Def Leppard Friday night. I have so been looking forward to this concert! Tesla is my alltime favorite band, but they were only the opening band here, so they didn't get all the bells and whistles (didn't need them, they are solid, hard-core, still awesome). We had so much fun. I recall concerts with my ex - we wouldn't touch. Wouldn't swing or sway. He said, "everyone enjoys music differently." His way of "enjoying music" was standing or sitting there like a statue, "listening." That's not my way. I get excited. I get INTO it. (Whether I am drinking or not). Anyway, we had a BLAST; sang, danced, kissed, on our feet all through all three bands. Normally not ones to have our phones out at all, we were coerced into taking one selfie - the couple next to us made us do it "You guys must take a selfie and put it on facebook." We had told them we don't do that stuff - but caved to their peer pressure. lol I guess a few minutes later a friend of ours on FB sent us both a message saying, "look at the back of your section" but we didn't get the message until the next morning because we didn't look at our phones again. So I talked with her a bit and apologized for being snobs, not seeing her. She said she tried to get our attention but we were having too much fun. Then she said, "I was so jealous of you two, actually, and XXX and I got in a huge fight because we don't have FUN anymore." YIKES! But, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. I just told her I was sorry and I hope they can work it out. But, yes -- we really do have fun together. We enjoy things the same way. We are compatible, it's not always a struggle, a fight, an argument, someone being left disappointed, etc, etc and on and on and ON...... GOD, I HATED concerts with my ex -- his way of attempting affection at the end was leaning on me like I was a fence post, his elbow on my shoulder (he was 6'4, I'm 5'6). It makes me shudder just thinking about it... I remember longing to be that couple who was in arm in arm, singing, loving, having fun. Now I am. We also had a hot tub in our room, which led to a fun, private after party that lasted till wee hours of the morning.... we were a little embarrassed walking out of our room the next morning on our way to the continental breakfast because it wasn't a quiet party by any stretch. Anyway -- what's worse? Pain of staying the same, or pain of taking that step to a more fulfilling life? Know yourself. Know what you want. Figure that stuff out and go for it. This describes to a "t" all the things that really contributed to so much of my heartache these last few years of being together with my wife. I love going to shows, being outdoors, dancing, and being publicly affectionate. She had no interest in most of the things that I do, and wasn't willing to try out any new activities. There have been so many shows I've been to over the last two years that would have been so much more fun with a dance partner, that I had to go to alone. I still had a lot of fun, but the loneliness only got worse. |
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Post by WindSister on Apr 25, 2017 9:44:38 GMT -5
Oh, and this might be old-fashioned, but we also protect our relationship from outsiders. He naturally does it, it wasn't something we had to discuss or study or anything. He really is the most loyal man I have ever met - from him I have learned the value of true honesty, patience, determination and perseverance (we are remodeling our basement, literally, just $50/paycheck at a time and it's actually almost done... astonishing to me!). Anyway, I went out with him and his co-workers a couple weeks ago because he invited me. He said the last time he went without me it got stupid with some of the women co-workers throwing shots around and he left because, and I quote, "Because I didn't want any talk circulating through the company." He wanted me there the next time it was a co-worker night out. I got there and one female co-worker said, "your husband talks about you ALL the time." I just laughed and said, 'oh?' Yeah, his co-workers know quite a bit about me, so I was a little scared to find out what, but turns out he just shares the good stuff. Well, or they just let me know they know the good stuff, but I did ask him and he said he would never share compromising things. I believe him.
Anyway, that's actually a "thing" - to talk about your spouse in a positive light to the opposite sex. They call it "Affair Repellent." We laughed about that on our way home. He said I better be spraying that stuff, too! I do. (like crazy) I work with all women, though, so that's not exactly an issue with me anyway.
My thing about this Affair Repellent is this though -- hopefully it is genuine, real and not a facade (we all know that here, it's all great on the front, but yea, we are miserable behind the scenes.). Some of the "advise" we see out there for keeping relationships alive IS actually useful and true but it has to come from an authentic place and true love - if it's just a cover up, it will rip, shred, and blow in the wind revealing the truth. We gotta face the hard stuff head on.
Anyway -- just rambling with thoughts this morning as if I have a flipping clue. (I don't) I could talk in circles on the subject of relationships. haha Have a good day and take care of yourselves!
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Post by WindSister on Apr 25, 2017 9:50:16 GMT -5
sorry, cagedtiger - that kind of loneliness does suck. Kudos to you for still pursuing the things you love, though. Keep doing that, I truly do believe when we do, we attract our partner. (or at least, we are having more fun than just staying home and feeling sad). |
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Post by cagedtiger on Apr 25, 2017 10:36:53 GMT -5
sorry, cagedtiger - that kind of loneliness does suck. Kudos to you for still pursuing the things you love, though. Keep doing that, I truly do believe when we do, we attract our partner. (or at least, we are having more fun than just staying home and feeling sad). I went to a concert Friday night and a festival out of town the rest of the weekend. I went with one of my best friends, we ran into several of my oldest friends from childhood, and had an absolute blast. I bought the tickets for both back in November, before I separated from my wife. I knew then that I wanted to go, but I also knew I didn't want to go with her. The sad thing is, our first dance at our wedding was to a song by the band that was playing Friday. I purposely didn't tell her about either of those shows, because I never had any intention of going with her to begin with. That was telling. When I get back out there, this is going to be pretty much non - negotiatiable, and it honestly won't surprise me if my future dating pool consists of people I meet at shows. |
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Post by shamwow on May 10, 2017 13:52:40 GMT -5
Great Radio Controversy is one of my favorite albums. I can play about half the songs on there (or at least used to be able to). Hang Tough is a kick-ass song to get a burst of adrenaline to when running.
Sounds like you had a blast!
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