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Post by deleted on Apr 27, 2016 22:34:55 GMT -5
I'll be waiting for you!
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Post by DryCreek on Apr 27, 2016 22:44:05 GMT -5
So now that Target is allowing any gender to use any restroom... Yeah. What could possibly go wrong with this new policy? I'll stop there before I go on a rant... |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 27, 2016 23:11:57 GMT -5
I'll be there tomorrow.  |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 27, 2016 23:14:39 GMT -5
So now that Target is allowing any gender to use any restroom... Yeah. What could possibly go wrong with this new policy? I'll stop there before I go on a rant... I actually deleted most of my rant before I posted. It does no good to upset myself before bed, so I know what you mean. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 8:07:32 GMT -5
Yeah. What could possibly go wrong with this new policy? I'll stop there before I go on a rant... I actually deleted most of my rant before I posted. It does no good to upset myself before bed, so I know what you mean. It's not good to ever get yourself upset over things you can't change. I wanted to rant too. Car, have a great day and understand we all hear and share your unstated rant. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 9:04:35 GMT -5
I actually deleted most of my rant before I posted. It does no good to upset myself before bed, so I know what you mean. It's not good to ever get yourself upset over things you can't change. I wanted to rant too. Car, have a great day and understand we all hear and share your unstated rant. Thanks Creel. I think we have a choice in some things...the above is a good example. I was really peeved at Target and this whole business, but I chose to tone it down for my own sake...going to bed angry or upset is never a good idea. However, there are other things that upset us that are much harder for us to choose. Yesterday was a good example. Yes, I kept telling myself to remain calm and do some mindful breathing, and I'm sure I was actually calmer than I would have been without this technique, but I was still upset. I can't think straight when I'm upset. My thoughts either get muddled or my mind goes blank like zoning out. Trying to choose my mind not going blank does not seem like a choice, it seems to be a chemical reaction to stress in my case...the fight or flight response...which one is immobilized and zoning out response? This only started happening after a full mental breakdown 5-years ago when I pretty much (or my brain did) zoned out 98% of its cognitive capacity. It took months to recover to where I am now, but I was left with an after effect...my mind starts shutting down when faced with too much stress...like my brain is saying, " hey, I've been there, done that, it was bad, so I'm not going there again." Basically a protective measure so I don't lose my mind completely. If I have a choice in not having my mind zone out, I don't know how to do it. It's like a reflex action like when the doctor hits your knee to get a reflex. It's automatic. This is why...and especially during this first year of being single, which was high stress for the first few months...I had to retreat from the world and find some quiet and peace. I'm hoping as time goes on, maybe years, I will heal and return to how my mind used to be. This is why my inner peace is my top priority. |
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Post by DryCreek on Apr 29, 2016 12:20:02 GMT -5
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
- Edmund Burke
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Post by greatcoastal on Apr 29, 2016 14:41:32 GMT -5
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke
My daughter needed a new bathing suit. I did not shop at Target. So by doing nothing ( not spending money there) I did something! |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 14:45:03 GMT -5
It's not good to ever get yourself upset over things you can't change. I wanted to rant too. Car, have a great day and understand we all hear and share your unstated rant. Thanks Creel. I think we have a choice in some things...the above is a good example. I was really peeved at Target and this whole business, but I chose to tone it down for my own sake...going to bed angry or upset is never a good idea. However, there are other things that upset us that are much harder for us to choose. Yesterday was a good example. Yes, I kept telling myself to remain calm and do some mindful breathing, and I'm sure I was actually calmer than I would have been without this technique, but I was still upset. I can't think straight when I'm upset. My thoughts either get muddled or my mind goes blank like zoning out. Trying to choose my mind not going blank does not seem like a choice, it seems to be a chemical reaction to stress in my case...the fight or flight response...which one is immobilized and zoning out response? This only started happening after a full mental breakdown 5-years ago when I pretty much (or my brain did) zoned out 98% of its cognitive capacity. It took months to recover to where I am now, but I was left with an after effect...my mind starts shutting down when faced with too much stress...like my brain is saying, " hey, I've been there, done that, it was bad, so I'm not going there again." Basically a protective measure so I don't lose my mind completely. If I have a choice in not having my mind zone out, I don't know how to do it. It's like a reflex action like when the doctor hits your knee to get a reflex. It's automatic. This is why...and especially during this first year of being single, which was high stress for the first few months...I had to retreat from the world and find some quiet and peace. I'm hoping as time goes on, maybe years, I will heal and return to how my mind used to be. This is why my inner peace is my top priority. Car, I totally understand. Please understand these things happen to lots of folks. There's a saying that eventually a project (or whatever you do that's important) will break you. I've seen it many times, and it has happened to me. We may succeed 10 times against terrible odds and the stress that goes along with it, but eventually, there will be one that you simply cannot resolve (business, projects, something if you engage in high responsibility cutting edge things). At some point in that failure process, we yield. Like a steel beam finally giving way under load. When that happens, we are visibly sprung and we can never be made straight again. That's not to say we're worthless, but never again will we resist insurmountable strain to allow that degree of failure. We'll accept it and even plan for it. Personally, I think this is usually a good thing if managed properly. Personally, I will never say (promise and personally believe) that I can accomplish the impossible. I've seen impossible (for me at least) and I know it's not just a "Challenge". It truly is an impossibility. I hear the "Management Gurus" and the politically correct drones and I know they're just full of shit. And it does not bother me. Go ahead and do the impossible and call me when you need it cleaned up. I read somewhere about a conference of Anglican Pastors in Wales where a young pastor was setting the country on fire for God. One of the old guys looked at one of the other ones and said "He hasn't fallen yet". The old guys knew that everyone falls eventually. And God is there to pick the pieces up. This monkey business will also pass. Its primary victims are the poor souls that believe it. That's not you. And it's not me. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 14:48:13 GMT -5
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke
DC, I'm sure you are doing plenty. Just being cognizant of the foolishness of this line of reasoning and being able to articulate it to anyone that asks you is doing A LOT. Most folks -- while they recognize the foolishness on an instinctive level -- cannot explain it cogently enough to help others avoid it. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 16:14:01 GMT -5
@creelunion Very well said. I do agree with you. However, it's troubling to think I can never be "straightend." Do you really think that this is it for me, and my mind will never be fully restored to its pre-breakdown condition?
What you said about falling reminds me of this: if we hold a glass of water, it does not feel heavy, but if we hold it for an hour, our hand would start to ache or cramp. One day, one month, one year or several years, that hand – and probably the arm and shoulder too are going to be in bad shape. At some point that glass will fall. It wasn't a heavy weight but it was carried too long. How much harder to carry a heavy weight (or several) for years and/or decades. That's when the camel only needs a straw to break its back.
I live in hope that one day my mind will function as it once did.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 16:23:01 GMT -5
@creelunion Very well said. I do agree with you. However, it's troubling to think I can never be "straightend." Do you really think that this is it for me, and my mind will never be fully restored to its pre-breakdown condition? What you said about falling reminds me of this: if we hold a glass of water, it does not feel heavy, but if we hold it for an hour, our hand would start to ache or cramp. One day, one month, one year or several years, that hand – and probably the arm and shoulder too are going to be in bad shape. At some point that glass will fall. It wasn't a heavy weight but it was carried too long. How much harder to carry a heavy weight (or several) for years and/or decades. That's when the camel only needs a straw to break its back. I live in hope that one day my mind will function as it once did. Car, I'm not the one to ask. I'm not sure we're meant to be straightened perfectly. Maybe the bends are what make some of us beautiful. Or perhaps more useful. Or less destructive (in my case maybe). For me, I tend to think my bends and breaks were good for me. Or maybe good for the rest of the world that I affect. Something had to give. Your mind seems plenty functional to me. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 16:36:41 GMT -5
@creelunion Very well said. I do agree with you. However, it's troubling to think I can never be "straightend." Do you really think that this is it for me, and my mind will never be fully restored to its pre-breakdown condition? What you said about falling reminds me of this: if we hold a glass of water, it does not feel heavy, but if we hold it for an hour, our hand would start to ache or cramp. One day, one month, one year or several years, that hand – and probably the arm and shoulder too are going to be in bad shape. At some point that glass will fall. It wasn't a heavy weight but it was carried too long. How much harder to carry a heavy weight (or several) for years and/or decades. That's when the camel only needs a straw to break its back. I live in hope that one day my mind will function as it once did. Car, I'm not the one to ask. I'm not sure we're meant to be straightened perfectly. Maybe the bends are what make some of us beautiful. Or perhaps more useful. Or less destructive (in my case maybe). For me, I tend to think my bends and breaks were good for me. Or maybe good for the rest of the world that I affect. Something had to give. Your mind seems plenty functional to me. My mind is fine except I can no longer think on my feet. My concentration and memory are impaired. I can no longer learn and recall things like I did. My thinking is much slower. What bothers me is when I need to find work. I think just writing a resume would have me zoning out...at present. It feels like too much to deal with, so my mind shuts off, and won't even go there. I don't even have a desire to go back to the "world." I've been out of it so long, I feel like an alien. I guess I'll deal with all that when I have to, but for now I'm okay not working and just healing. I feel very fortunate not to need a job at this time. I live very frugally now, but I manage. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2016 16:42:47 GMT -5
My mind is fine except I can no longer think on my feet. My concentration and memory are impaired. I can no longer learn and recall things like I did. My thinking is much slower. What bothers me is when I need to find work. I think just writing a resume would have me zoning out...at present. It feels like too much to deal with, so my mind shuts off, and won't even go there. I don't even have a desire to go back to the "world." I've been out of it so long, I feel like an alien. I guess I'll deal with all that when I have to, but for now I'm okay not working and just healing. I feel very fortunate not to need a job at this time. I live very frugally now, but I manage. Well, I think you're awesome. |
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Post by itsjustus on Apr 29, 2016 16:48:26 GMT -5
T hanks Creel. I think we have a choice in some things...the above is a good example. I was really peeved at Target and this whole business, but I chose to tone it down for my own sake...going to bed angry or upset is never a good idea. However, there are other things that upset us that are much harder for us to choose. Yesterday was a good example. Yes, I kept telling myself to remain calm and do some mindful breathing, and I'm sure I was actually calmer than I would have been without this technique, but I was still upset. I can't think straight when I'm upset. My thoughts either get muddled or my mind goes blank like zoning out. Trying to choose my mind not going blank does not seem like a choice, it seems to be a chemical reaction to stress in my case...the fight or flight response...which one is immobilized and zoning out response? This only started happening after a full mental breakdown 5-years ago when I pretty much (or my brain did) zoned out 98% of its cognitive capacity. It took months to recover to where I am now, but I was left with an after effect...my mind starts shutting down when faced with too much stress...like my brain is saying, " hey, I've been there, done that, it was bad, so I'm not going there again." Basically a protective measure so I don't lose my mind completely. If I have a choice in not having my mind zone out, I don't know how to do it. It's like a reflex action like when the doctor hits your knee to get a reflex. It's automatic. This is why...and especially during this first year of being single, which was high stress for the first few months...I had to retreat from the world and find some quiet and peace. I'm hoping as time goes on, maybe years, I will heal and return to how my mind used to be. This is why my inner peace is my top priority. Jasiri, I had, and have, the same thing happening to me! I had a breakdown in the middle of trying to repair my former marriage, on the drive to a therapist. I wrote a story about it on EP in fact. I too recovered, and even left the marriage, but I have the same lingering affect. When things get overloaded, when too much stress happens, I get the same brain thing: "hey, been there, done that, it's bad, "we" are shutting down for a bit. Sorry....". Completely automatic. I suppose it's better than the turmoil and tornado of thoughts that went before. But I also found the same thing, that retreating, finding some peace and quiet, helps calm everything. I did that for a whole year shortly after leaving, and now find that some in my family don't understand it or why I was so distant and are now resentful, of all things!! Their lack of empathy and understanding ironically makes me want to check out again... But out of all that, it's true. My inner peace is my top, TOP, priority. |
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