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Post by Dan on Dec 8, 2016 17:09:45 GMT -5
Sorry I haven't been on the forum much lately. No news on my front... just trying to take care of my active family. (Is "keeping busy" a good therapy for dealing with my SM? Usually it seems like it. Or is it a form of procrastination and avoidance? I dunno. Depends on what day you ask me.) Anyway, I was just "cleaning up my hard drive" because I have to start moving files to a new laptop before I give up this one. It's a royal hassle, but, hey my employer gave me a new work laptop, so, well, there's that. Came across this image-quote... I don't think it has been posted in the forum. Gave me pause. I thought it was relevant, so here it is. Still struggling with the idea of leaving your sexless marriage? Consider this:  |
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Post by bballgirl on Dec 8, 2016 18:29:42 GMT -5
Love the butterfly!
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Post by nancyb on Dec 8, 2016 19:29:44 GMT -5
Thank you Dan. That means a lot to me today.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 8, 2016 21:27:44 GMT -5
I say that to my wife all the time: This will end when I die.
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Post by novembercomingfire on Dec 8, 2016 22:17:35 GMT -5
I say that to my wife all the time: This will end when I die. I fear this is true for me as well. I feel like I was sentenced to life without parole. I can't even figure out what I did. |
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Post by baza on Dec 8, 2016 22:24:57 GMT -5
I ain't so sure the Buddha was endorsing a policy of inertia.
There's nothing in that quote that says you can't give the "beginning" or "ending" of something a push along.
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Post by obobfla on Dec 8, 2016 23:02:22 GMT -5
I think Buddha was saying relax about your relationships. We all talk about staying together forever, and we can't be together forever. My parents were lucky enough to be married 58 years and die within three months of each other.
So, I just cherish what time I spend with my loved ones. Like lives, relationships grow, evolve, and die. It's natural.
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Post by nancyb on Dec 9, 2016 5:52:41 GMT -5
baza: I take it to mean the circle of life. What is born will die and the sooner you recognize your own mortality the more you can live life fully... I don't see inertia there at all.
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Post by wewbwb on Dec 9, 2016 7:02:30 GMT -5
Sorry I haven't been on the forum much lately. No news on my front... just trying to take care of my active family. (Is "keeping busy" a good therapy for dealing with my SM? Usually it seems like it. Or is it a form of procrastination and avoidance? I dunno. Depends on what day you ask me.) Anyway, I was just "cleaning up my hard drive" because I have to start moving files to a new laptop before I give up this one. It's a royal hassle, but, hey my employer gave me a new work laptop, so, well, there's that. Came across this image-quote... I don't think it has been posted in the forum. Gave me pause. I thought it was relevant, so here it is. Still struggling with the idea of leaving (ending) your sexless marriage? Consider this:  While there is nothing wrong with the idea of this, it is NOT a quote from Buddha. |
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Post by Chatter Fox on Dec 9, 2016 7:39:01 GMT -5
While there is nothing wrong with the idea of this, it is NOT a quote from Buddha. I actually had a feeling about this. I'm not in any way, shape, or form an expert in Buddhism. I've read a little about it though because I really am drawn to it for some reason. Anyway, from the little I've read about Buddhism, it seems as though a common thread in it is that there is no beginning and no end. There is no birth and no death. Just different manifestations of the same thing. It's about energy taking on different forms rather than things being created or destroyed. So that quote seemed to run contrary to the little bit Ive learned about Buddhism. I love the quote. I first read it yesterday and it really had a positive impact on me. So I hope none of this is coming across as criticism. It's just an observation. I'd like to add though that the view of "no beginning / no end" could be equally positive for us to think about. Rather than see us "ending" our marriages, maybe see it as allowing our marriages to take on another form? We can decide to some extent, what that forms is. At least, that is, if our spouses are cooperative enough to be amicable about things. |
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Post by GeekGoddess on Dec 9, 2016 8:09:17 GMT -5
I say that to my wife all the time: This will end when I die. I fear this is true for me as well. I feel like I was sentenced to life without parole. I can't even figure out what I did. You chose to STAY. That's all. You have the key to the gate. For ME, this was true. When I observed how I went back to prison each night, what distorted comfort I found in my dysfunction, how quaint it felt to have a crappy marriage to complain about being a victim of instead of ripping my life out of the hands of the refuser & facing my own future myself....then I understood that I was actually holding the key. I was afraid to use it for a little while longer. But I got to use it before it was too late. Good luck to all. |
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Post by GeekGoddess on Dec 9, 2016 8:11:52 GMT -5
All marriages end. If not by divorce then by death.
Live today. It's all we're sure we have.
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Post by JonDoe on Dec 9, 2016 8:28:25 GMT -5
I love Happy Endings!!! 
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Post by beachguy on Dec 9, 2016 9:53:21 GMT -5
I say that to my wife all the time: This will end when I die. I fear this is true for me as well. I feel like I was sentenced to life without parole. I can't even figure out what I did. I thought that for years... A life sentence without possibility of parole AND NO CONJUGAL VISITS. And then I realized there was a key within arm's reach of the cell door. |
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Post by Dan on Dec 9, 2016 11:10:33 GMT -5
While there is nothing wrong with the idea of this, it is NOT a quote from Buddha. : Good catch. Thank you. All: sorry for posting something with a fake attribution. (I'm quite embarrassed, actually.) I've updated my original image, and attempted to delete the incorrect image from imgbb.com. |
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