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Post by eternaloptimism on Dec 8, 2016 6:29:35 GMT -5
Damn - needed this message, BBG!! Thank you. I've gotta work up my nerve for young masseuse. I need a chance & opportunity to tell him how attracted to him I am. I'm trying to get my courage up for it. How about a playful - "Do you know I think you are so delicious/ handsome/ hot". Followed by a -"Have you ever been with an older woman before"? Followed by "The things I would love to do to you!" You can maybe say it in a playful non serious way so that you are letting him know you think he's hot and you are opening a door if he wants to walk through it. Yeah yeah yeah. Do what bb says gg! You have so much fun ahead of you. Clever girl xxx |
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Post by iceman on Dec 8, 2016 8:50:11 GMT -5
There are days when I think 'screw it!! I'll just give her everything and start over completely fresh'. It doesn't make sense that I should lose everything I realize but I've always thought losing everything would be both terrifying and exhilarating. Something about starting completely over again has a certain appeal to me. I've had an interesting idea along these lines... Imagine starting over with all that you know now. The risks you might be willing to take, having nothing to lose. And the chance those big bets might payoff because you're much more experienced. I certainly wouldn't wish for it, but sometimes life gives us a "tough love" push out of the nest that forces us to spread our wings. Very true. Sometimes the best things happen when you're forced out of your current situation and have no choice but move on. |
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Post by obobfla on Dec 8, 2016 20:31:29 GMT -5
Ok, of all the threads on this forum, this one hit me the hardest.
When I was young, single, drinking, and lacking loads of self-confidence, my greatest fear was growing old and dying alone. I'd have panic attacks that I thought were heart attacks, and I would die there with someone discovering my body a few days later.
Now I am married but more lonely than ever, at least with adults. I do have my son, thankfully. But my wife and I don't talk much anymore except about what bills to pay or what's for dinner. She doesn't do small talk anymore. She doesn't even listen to music or watch TV. She just sits there in the dark, scared to do anything. When I go sick for real twice last year and asked her to take me to the emergency room, she balked. She relented the first time, but I had to call an ambulance the second time when I was shaking and slurring my speech as if I was having a stroke.
But when she got sick twice this year, I insisted she go to the emergency room. It saved her life both times. Right now she can barely take care of herself, so I have to help take care of her.
The irony is that I am married yet that great fear I had in my younger days may still come true. Worse still, the person who I need to make that call for me might not call.
I don't have that fear anymore after watching my parents die. What I truly fear is missing out on what years I have left. I'm torn between leaving my wife when she is sick, or staying with her and ruining my own life.
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Post by baza on Dec 8, 2016 20:59:51 GMT -5
This is the great dilemma Brother obobfla.
Were you to fall ill, and cark it, how would your missus survive ?
What contingency plan is there for this - entirely possible (but hopefully not to happen today) - scenario to play out ?
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Could this contingency plan be modified so that you could still be a support person in her life without being there 24/7, rather than a scenario where you were there 0 more days ever ?
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As it stands, your missus doesn't sound very happy, or being capable of being terribly happy, and you certainly don't seem too happy.
Can a case be made for at least one of you being happy ?
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This is a shit of a position to be in, but it also reads as a situation that is not doing much for either of you.
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Post by obobfla on Dec 8, 2016 21:25:15 GMT -5
Right now, the top priority is to get her physical health back to working order, and that is coming along. The other is to figure out how she got sick in the first place. Her sodium level dropped, and no doctor can explain why.
As for long-term plans, I am reaching out to families, both hers and mine. I am also researching what social services are available, but not much is here in the Sunshine State. There is also a third person to consider, and that is my son. He is my greatest priority.
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