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Post by ggold on Oct 20, 2016 14:53:33 GMT -5
Having a pity party. Some days are better than others.
I feel very empty, scattered, disconnected.
I think my birthday coming up on Saturday is bringing up feelings that another year has gone by and nothing has changed because I have not done anything about it. I'm so pissed off at myself for being a coward.
It's one of those days. :-(
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Post by misssunnybunny on Oct 20, 2016 15:02:22 GMT -5
Some days are better than others.
Honor your feelings: cry, wallow, get through them so you can get back to yourself again.
This entire process is such a roller coaster of emotions. Life events like birthdays and holidays can amplify these feelings. Just remember you are dong something about it. You are here, learning, getting support, and using all of this information to help put together a plan for yourself to put into place, both when you are ready. You are strong for putting up with the crap of an SM, and you will find that strength to start the leaving process. I am a gigantic coward, and somehow I got through leaving (I have no idea how, but I did and discovered the fear of before saying anything was worse than having to go through the divorce). I totally feel your pain here. {{hugs}}
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Post by ted on Oct 20, 2016 15:52:06 GMT -5
I'm sorry you're having a particularly rough day. I know what that's like.
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Post by eternaloptimism on Oct 20, 2016 16:46:24 GMT -5
Squeezes beautiful xxx
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Post by bballgirl on Oct 20, 2016 16:55:25 GMT -5
Big hugs honey. I'm thinking about you.
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Post by Caris on Oct 20, 2016 18:26:49 GMT -5
@ggold,
{{hugs}} Have a good cry, dear. I still feel like this, and I'm post SM. ☹️
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Post by ggold on Oct 20, 2016 18:52:36 GMT -5
I'm sorry you're having a particularly rough day. I know what that's like. Awww..thank you ted. I know. This all sucks. Can you put a smile on your face for me please?? :-) |
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Post by ggold on Oct 20, 2016 18:53:58 GMT -5
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Post by greatcoastal on Oct 20, 2016 19:00:47 GMT -5
Having a pity party. Some days are better than others. I feel very empty, scattered, disconnected. I think my birthday coming up on Saturday is bringing up feelings that another year has gone by and nothing has changed because I have not done anything about it. I'm so pissed off at myself for being a coward. It's one of those days. :-( Would planning a day of self for your Birthday give you strength? Build your self worth? Finding joy in the things that you like, and perhaps others to share it with. Be it the children, another female or male friend? The spa. Get your nails done. Get your hair styled. Buy some new shoes. Movie and ice cream. |
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Post by ggold on Oct 20, 2016 19:01:49 GMT -5
greatcoastal Yes. I need to do something. Spa facial sounds good to me. xo
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Post by greatcoastal on Oct 20, 2016 19:16:35 GMT -5
greatcoastal Yes. I need to do something. Spa facial sounds good to me. xo You go friend! Make that appointment tomorrow! I bet you have a friend who owes you a favor. Ask them to join you for a late night movie. If your like me, you spend your birthday at home, so all the kids can wish you happy birthday? The home made cards are okay. The kids are really only interested in getting their slice of cake. ( doughnuts for everyone are cheaper, easier, and less messy). You could go off in the morning, and later in the evening. Middle of the day for the family. A good time to change "give,give,give," to "give, and take, take." |
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Post by JonDoe on Oct 20, 2016 19:27:47 GMT -5
I am usually able to remain in a fog on my birthday, but I definitely get that way at XMAS and New Year's.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 21, 2016 11:33:11 GMT -5
ggold, Birthdays and holidays can suck really hard if your love life is all wrong. I've dreaded the holidays for the past 4 years. Even 3-day weekends like Labor Day have sucked. Probably because I have this fantasy in my head that everybody else is having fun except me. (Note to self: Don't compare my insides to other people's outsides.)
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Post by greatcoastal on Oct 21, 2016 11:41:25 GMT -5
ggold , Birthdays and holidays can suck really hard if your love life is all wrong. I've dreaded the holidays for the past 4 years. Even 3-day weekends like Labor Day have sucked. Probably because I have this fantasy in my head that everybody else is having fun except me. (Note to self: Don't compare my insides to other people's outsides.) Well spoken! If I may add on to that, look back on all those lonely vacations, three day weekends, holidays, with an avoidant, controlling spouse. I'd rather live in an empty house than with an empty spouse! |
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Post by iceman on Oct 21, 2016 12:18:13 GMT -5
I'm sorry you're having such a bad day. I understand. The days fly and nothing changes and it feels like there's no way to stop them. Birthdays suck. Holidays suck. Vacations suck. All days suck when you're in a SM and you don't want to be with your significant other but these are particularly bad. Hang in there. This day will pass and I hope tomorrow will be better
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