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Post by greatcoastal on Sept 28, 2016 19:24:10 GMT -5
All I want, all I've been begging for, is a nice used all wheel drive, turbocharged, manual transmission hatchback or wagon to replace my 12 year old, 175,000 mile college beater that's about to start costing us upwards of $1000 a repair as all the expensive stuff wears out. I've even found examples of exactly what I want when they pop up (they're painfully rare nowadays) for $20000 or less. Nope, we can't afford it. But how much does all that takeout cost every month? Time for some budget busting!!! More fuel for the fire of the "control" issue. As Genie told Aladin, "you've got some power in you corner now, some heavy ammunition in your camp!" |
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Post by greatcoastal on Sept 28, 2016 19:50:40 GMT -5
greatcoastal . Excellent find with your new car! I found some used options that we will look into. When we were looking at the Ford C-Max the salesman demonstrated that the back seats fold flat. I looked at my husband and said "Oh look, on my next road trip I can just bring a sleeping bag and camp in the car". He looked at me with horror so I gave him a smile and he relaxed. He thinks I was kidding.... Room in the back seat for three kids, can also serve...cough,cough,wink, other....purposes! I've looked in the back of our Yukon,with the seats folded down, trunk open, full of surf boards, for too many years now thinking of the wasted years! Choosing between a body style that had just ended verses one that is only a year old, made a difference. Considering resale, and return investment. I guess the bad part is so many years of being manipulated into being such a tight, practical, put yourself last spender, leaves a guilt feeling for doing something for myself. Gaining ground and finding joy, sometimes can be instant, and others are worth waiting for. I believe in a matter of days, or weeks I will be happy with my decision. Wait till the boys want to use my car because it has blue tooth! Thanks for "sharing " your thread with me! |
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Post by Deleted on Sept 28, 2016 21:11:31 GMT -5
I was curious how the truck being in her name is a game changer? If it was acquired while you were married isn't it half yours regardless. And if she stole the keys so you couldn't drive it, she'd be getting her tires slashed on her car and the truck. But that's me! The truck is considered joint property. She has to sign off for the truck she refuses. The truck has many things wrong with it, it has negative value. What would have been a win win situation, will not happen. She wants to be in control. She can not realize that she is taking from the big pot that will be divided anyways. The fact that I am going out and bying another vehicle without her control annoys the hell out of her. The tags belong to her as well. She can keep them. Its all money that would not have to come out of the pot. There is no communication, on her part or compromise. She is upset because I will not start spending the half of our savings that my attorney tells me not to touch for daily expenses, car repair, AC repair for the house, etc... Shouldn't you wait until you're divorced to by a new vehicle? |
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Post by greatcoastal on Sept 28, 2016 21:50:38 GMT -5
The truck is considered joint property. She has to sign off for the truck she refuses. The truck has many things wrong with it, it has negative value. What would have been a win win situation, will not happen. She wants to be in control. She can not realize that she is taking from the big pot that will be divided anyways. The fact that I am going out and bying another vehicle without her control annoys the hell out of her. The tags belong to her as well. She can keep them. Its all money that would not have to come out of the pot. There is no communication, on her part or compromise. She is upset because I will not start spending the half of our savings that my attorney tells me not to touch for daily expenses, car repair, AC repair for the house, etc... Shouldn't you wait until you're divorced to by a new vehicle? I would think the same thing! Our/my truck is dying, it's no longer safe to drive, yet it still runs. Once my attorney found out that my STBX wanted me to pay for the repairs, to keep it running from our savings that was divided, she advised me to buy a replacement. Knowing that a year ago my STBX's car died, ( would cost more to fix it than it was worth, like our truck) she went out and spent $13,000 for a replacement. $3000 over what she told me was " in the budget", that's a whole other story. My attorney said boldly," go spend $13,000 and get a replacement,buy whatever you want, it's an every day necessity, a regular cost of living." I just did it now instead of later when things get divided equally. Being short a vehicle makes a big difference with nine of us and five drivers. I hope that answers it. It throws fuel on the fire! Not anyone's fault the truck decided to give it up, 5 weeks into the divorce, right when she decided to leave me with insufficient funding. Right before a temporary relief amount is to be set, all over less than a thousand dollars of daily living repairs, and expenses. |
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Post by baza on Sept 28, 2016 23:20:29 GMT -5
Quoting you here Brother ct. - "All I want, all I've been begging for, is a nice used all wheel drive, turbocharged, manual transmission hatchback or wagon to replace my 12 year old, 175,000 mile college beater that's about to start costing us upwards of $1000 a repair as all the expensive stuff wears out. I've even found examples of exactly what I want when they pop up (they're painfully rare nowadays) for $20000 or less. Nope, we can't afford it. But how much does all that takeout cost every month?"
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Are "you" not in a financial position to buy "your" own car ?
Are you seriously suggesting that given the state of the marriage and it's likely future, that your missus ought take on the responsibility to pay off - or help you pay off - a vehicle (presumably over a few years) when the marriage may run only a few more months ?
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Post by eternaloptimism on Sept 29, 2016 0:10:13 GMT -5
All I want, all I've been begging for, is a nice used all wheel drive, turbocharged, manual transmission hatchback or wagon to replace my 12 year old, 175,000 mile college beater that's about to start costing us upwards of $1000 a repair as all the expensive stuff wears out. I've even found examples of exactly what I want when they pop up (they're painfully rare nowadays) for $20000 or less. Nope, we can't afford it. But how much does all that takeout cost every month? Probably less than weed  Ban her Tiger. Get the car. Go on. Xxx |
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Post by Deleted on Sept 29, 2016 10:44:54 GMT -5
Shouldn't you wait until you're divorced to by a new vehicle? I would think the same thing! Our/my truck is dying, it's no longer safe to drive, yet it still runs. Once my attorney found out that my STBX wanted me to pay for the repairs, to keep it running from our savings that was divided, she advised me to buy a replacement. Knowing that a year ago my STBX's car died, ( would cost more to fix it than it was worth, like our truck) she went out and spent $13,000 for a replacement. $3000 over what she told me was " in the budget", that's a whole other story. My attorney said boldly," go spend $13,000 and get a replacement,buy whatever you want, it's an every day necessity, a regular cost of living." I just did it now instead of later when things get divided equally. Being short a vehicle makes a big difference with nine of us and five drivers. I hope that answers it. It throws fuel on the fire! Not anyone's fault the truck decided to give it up, 5 weeks into the divorce, right when she decided to leave me with insufficient funding. Right before a temporary relief amount is to be set, all over less than a thousand dollars of daily living repairs, and expenses. Aha! A daily necessity! love it. |
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