Losing my voice

His accusations are total horseshit avoidant excuses.

Focusing on yourself is a great idea!

Are you concerned that you will be " loosing your voice" with others too? I am. It is a concern of mine. That's one reason I have so much to say on here! So I don't grow dull, and cowardly cold. All part of the depression that comes with LIASM!

Thanks for every single response you have sent my way. I hope to return positive thoughts your way as well!

Oh man. Thanks so much for your response. Sometimes (truth be told, almost all the time) I feel very lost, confused and depressed. I see a therapist and am pretty good with dealing with the SM most days. 

Yes, I definitely am concerned I'll lose my voice with others and even on here too. 

Okay, here's to talking, speaking up, saying what's on our minds. (: (: (:

Anecdote.
A friend of mine - my age - has a tumultuous relationship with his step daughter.
On what I hear, she is a parasite, and plays her mother (my friends wife) like a piano (and on what I have actually observed this is a pretty accurate label)
The step daughter moved from the city to here about a year ago, ostenstensibly because country living would be good for her 2 kids - but I think in reality because it would be easier to sponge off her mother at closer distance.
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My friend made a big statement. - "If she moves up here, I am moving out"
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The daughter duly moved up here.
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Then he said to his missus - "They are not going to be hanging around here all day every day or I am outta here" and he and his missus agreed that they could come over every Sunday. And in the meantime they helped her with her rent etc etc and to get settled in.
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Within a fortnight the 'every Sunday' had turned in to every second day.
"If this continues, I am outta here" - my friend said.
And duly, every second day became 2 days out of every 3, the daughter sponging off the mother, which by default puts my friend in a position of subsidising the daughters indolent lifestyle.
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"I'm fucking sick of it" - he was telling me the other day when we went for a ride.
"Want an opinion ?" - I asked.
"Nup" - he said - adding "I know what your opinion would be".
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It is a very interesting dynamic this one.
There are all sorts of ways one could apportion out the blame here (not that there is any point in so doing), and everyone would be wearing their fair share of it.
Naturally, I am sympathetic to my friends position, but that doesn't absolve him of his role in the picture.
I like his missus too, but she has a fair bit of ownership in the picture as well.
The daughter, I don't like, and that probably colours my view of her part in the picture, so I'll not advance an opinion about her conduct.
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I do however think that my friend would do well to consult a lawyer in our jurisdiction and establish how a divorce would shake out for him. It would be a smart idea for his missus to do so as well.
The dynamic shows every sign of going guts up, (and I'd be betting at the instigation of my friends missus, who seems far more invested in her daughter and grandkids than she is in the marriage) probably sooner rather than later.

Thank you unmatched. I appreciate this. I'm gaining traction now. I work slowly but will get there. It's hard not to wish I could have gotten it together/ become stronger earlier but that kind of thinking sets me back so it's more important (for all of us still in a SM) to accept where we are --while-- taking strides towards our own happiness and independence.