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Post by Neotericgal on Jul 21, 2016 21:55:28 GMT -5
Back on June 29, you said you had your legal advice and an exit strategy in do-able shape, plus support network et al. - This now reads like you didn't and haven't yet sourced a lawyer or done the other prep work. (If I've got that wrong I apologise). It would be a real good idea to do that. And to construct your exit strategy and knock it in to do-able status, and to shore up your support network, and research everything you can find about helping kids (if any) transition through such a circumstance. Hi baza, thank you for your comment. I had a plan as to what to do in the what if, and I had some research completed as to what this would entail (step one list of attorneys, then getting a little place for me and my fur-babies). In that June 29 post, I was uncomfortably in a position of not truly knowing where he stood, and I was really was wishful that we would work things out, but that went to hell in a handbasket...! Unfortunately my actual exit plan was hinged on school completion and job so I need to re-evaluate my timing, figure out what I can feasibly do (everyone's feedback on that post made me really, really consider being wiser about the assets and getting some legal advice specific to that). In an ideal world, Id win the lottery, and would be nothing but a whisper in the wind as of last night to be honest, but unfortunately i'm stuck. |
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Post by bballgirl on Jul 21, 2016 21:57:59 GMT -5
I was naive like you. Controlled by my husband. Used to do everything around the house and for the children. I relate and identify with so much of what you wrote.
He may not want to take responsibility but you don't have to accept that life for yourself. You can deal out the consequences for his inactions.
I would never tell you what to do and I try to stay away from statements like that because everyone has to do what's good for them.
All I will say is you are 12 years in don't wait until year 23 to get out like I did.
I got out though and I am happier.
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Post by Neotericgal on Jul 21, 2016 22:33:22 GMT -5
I was naive like you. Controlled by my husband. Used to do everything around the house and for the children. I relate and identify with so much of what you wrote. He may not want to take responsibility but you don't have to accept that life for yourself. You can deal out the consequences for his inactions. I would never tell you what to do and I try to stay away from statements like that because everyone has to do what's good for them. All I will say is you are 12 years in don't wait until year 23 to get out like I did. I got out though and I am happier. Thank you ((hugs)). I've read through some of your other posts since I found this forum, and I appreciate your story, and really respect you for your courage. You're definitely a role model here, and inspiring. |
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Post by bballgirl on Jul 21, 2016 23:01:36 GMT -5
I was naive like you. Controlled by my husband. Used to do everything around the house and for the children. I relate and identify with so much of what you wrote. He may not want to take responsibility but you don't have to accept that life for yourself. You can deal out the consequences for his inactions. I would never tell you what to do and I try to stay away from statements like that because everyone has to do what's good for them. All I will say is you are 12 years in don't wait until year 23 to get out like I did. I got out though and I am happier. Thank you ((hugs)). I've read through some of your other posts since I found this forum, and I appreciate your story, and really respect you for your courage. You're definitely a role model here, and inspiring. [br Thank you for the kind words just trying to be supportive because I totally get it, 2 decades worth. |
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Post by petrushka on Jul 29, 2016 3:58:04 GMT -5
"You can stay if you want" - well I translate that as "I don't give a flying fuck if you don't".
After the length of time you've been married, does he realize it's HALF his house, HALF his bed?
Yeesh. Talk about self centered.
Sure doesn't sound to me like he's in the least interested in putting himself out
(never mind putting out, obviously) for you in any way. People like that are so sad, and what
a waste of perfectly good oxygen.
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