Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2016 9:25:51 GMT -5
Yesterday I posted about feeling "flat" after the relief of getting to a settlement with my STBX. That feeling didn't last too long.  Last night my son had a friend over to spend the night and so I had three teenagers bouncing around my small apartment, getting in my way while I was trying to cook dinner, making me laugh with their crazy stories and antics and ridiculous (friendly) arguments. And I realized how happy and energized I felt. This is my life now and I love it. I'm looking around my apartment right now and there are shoes and backpacks everywhere. There are baskets of laundry by the front door waiting for me to take them down to the laundry room. There are bathing suits hanging all over the bathroom and dishes all over the kitchen counter. There is a giant pile of sheet music on the floor beside my piano and two ukeleles on the dining room table. Everywhere I look, there are signs of a busy, happy life. Not a tidy life, mind you, but a good one. One that suits me. I expect there will be days with frustrations and disappointments, etc. It's a real life, not a fairy tale. But it's my life and I'm creating it day by day. Right now I'm enjoying the quiet before the storm - soon I'll have three starving kids wanting breakfast before I start shuttling them to different events. And it just makes me smile. This is my life now. And I like it. |
|
|
|
Post by SweepyBear on Jul 16, 2016 10:27:03 GMT -5
Kids have this habit of grounding you and also releasing the inner child that you try suppress being an "Adult" you are starting a fantastic journey and also one where you have the tools and abilities to take full advantage of, go and have a blast |
|
|
|
Post by bballgirl on Jul 16, 2016 10:49:22 GMT -5
Kids have this habit of grounding you and also releasing the inner child that you try suppress being an "Adult" you are starting a fantastic journey and also one where you have the tools and abilities to take full advantage of, go and have a blast Good point! That's why I don't believe in staying for the kids to turn 18 if you have a choice. I cherish my time with my kids and they add so much happiness to my life now while they are young. I know it's inevitable that they will grow up, leave, lead independent lives without me but right now to transition from being a family unit to living alone I'm glad that they are around a lot. |
|
|
|
Post by itsjustus on Jul 16, 2016 11:30:44 GMT -5
Wow......just.....WOW!!! Color! Life is in color for you! A mixed up, splattered all over, messy jumbled up palet of colors!! HOW COOL IS THAT!! That's how I think of it! Like my life had been reduced to shades of grey, not even just black and white. Just a ugly muddle of dark grey's. In my case, when I left, I turned around and ran right into a blast of technicolor, having fallen in love with someone while I was in the process of leaving my dark grey marriage. Thru circumstances beyond my control, I lost that someone...and I crashed...hard. I essentially closed my eyes to the world, and hid in the dark, refusing to look out at the world. But the weirdest thing happened.....I opened my eyes, just a slit's worth....and damned if the world wasn't still in color!!! Even though I was heartbroken and felt lost, every morning I was happy....no...ecstatic...that I was waking up without that dark cloud of dread and fear of having to face my ex, find out what she was pissed off about NOW, see if my day was going to be just grey existence or another day of shit storm. I DIDN'T HAVE THAT ANYMORE!! I didn't own that anymore. Not my problem, not my issue. I am living in color now!!! I started going out to see things. Playing my music, going to friends shows to watch them (and getting dragged up on stage....loved that....yes...I have an ego....LOL!!!) writing and reading on here... Or even just enjoying sitting around my place, looking at the "world" that I created, for myself. Color...everywhere. And now? Life's turning to technicolor again!! I've met someone....here....(No, @elle. I'm not telling who!! LOL!!) who is....wow....just...wow. Not only beautiful, inside and out, but knows...KNOWS...what that grey world is like! And is filling my world with technicolor and letting me fill her's with technicolor too!!! So yes! It's messy! It's chaotic! It's strung out all over!!!!!! It's gloriously in color!! Congrats!!! IJU |
|
|
|
Post by itsjustus on Jul 16, 2016 11:35:49 GMT -5
You have a ukelele? You have TWO ukeleles??? Hmmm....we have to talk! I've only got one, you must be very talented...
|
|
|
|
Post by Dan on Jul 16, 2016 11:51:04 GMT -5
MountainRunner my friend:
News of your "joyful mess" couldn't make me happier!
I am imagining that in my life, too... someday.
|
|
|
|
Post by Dan on Jul 16, 2016 11:53:38 GMT -5
You have a ukelele? You have TWO ukeleles??? Hmmm....we have to talk! I've only got one, you must be very talented... We are a three ukulele household! My daughter and I each play, often together. It draws us closer -- no doubt! I guess when we have our ILIASM getaway, we'll have to have a musician's jam as a side activity! |
|
|
|
Post by SweepyBear on Jul 16, 2016 12:09:08 GMT -5
Ukulele's have two few strings  |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2016 20:38:08 GMT -5
You have a ukelele? You have TWO ukeleles??? Hmmm....we have to talk! I've only got one, you must be very talented... We are a three ukulele household! My daughter and I each play, often together. It draws us closer -- no doubt! I guess when we have our ILIASM getaway, we'll have to have a musician's jam as a side activity! I'll bring my Tele and some greasy blues. Maybe encourage some attendees to dust their broom. |
|
|
|
Post by baza on Jul 16, 2016 20:47:22 GMT -5
I reckon that when you get out of an ILIASM shithole, it is a trade off situation.
-
You get rid of a major unresolvable problem.
You pick up a number of new - but resolvable - smaller problems as a result.
-
It's a good deal.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 17, 2016 16:08:00 GMT -5
You have a ukelele? You have TWO ukeleles??? Hmmm....we have to talk! I've only got one, you must be very talented... My daughter has a tenor uke and I have a baritone. I don't play ukelele anywhere near as well as I play piano, but I really love it. Now if I can just learn to strum and sing at the same time - it's really hilarious, if I sing, I start strumming the same pattern as the vocals instead of holding my strumming pattern. My daughter assures me I'll get past it. In the meantime, we both just crack up when it happens. |
|
