Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2016 21:44:00 GMT -5
You know what I find most awkward about vacation is not only not getting sex but then I don't have any privacy to take care of things on my own. There is always the shower but it is not exactly the same. Having said that I'd rather be on vacation then at work so its a tough one. I hear u on this one.... in a few cases the hotel gave us double beds! When she goes into the shower in the morning, I release my demons.... feel better.... then hit the shower after she comes out. She only gets dressed in the bathroom, oh heaven forbid I see her body... Roch..glad to hear I'm not the only one who doesn't even get to see her body. I haven't seen anything in about a year. |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2016 22:07:52 GMT -5
I hear u on this one.... in a few cases the hotel gave us double beds! When she goes into the shower in the morning, I release my demons.... feel better.... then hit the shower after she comes out. She only gets dressed in the bathroom, oh heaven forbid I see her body... Roch..glad to hear I'm not the only one who doesn't even get to see her body. I haven't seen anything in about a year. I'd send u a fist bump..... but we don't want to be fist bumping about this..... |
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Post by iceman on Jul 15, 2016 7:47:39 GMT -5
Sorry you're dealing with this, deleted . Vacation is rough with a refuser. That's why I recommend The Elle Solution(TM): leave the refuser at home and vacation with yo' damn self! Much more fun to be had that way! Of course you could take friends and/or family along too. Just so the refuser stays behind. ;-) A vacation alone or even just with the kids sounds really really nice. I need to work on that. We have a family vacation coming up next month that I'm dreading. Way too much time with her even with the kids around. I don't see much of an opportunity to get time away from her. I used to travel a lot for work at that kept me sane. I missed the kids but my stress level was down. |
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Post by greatcoastal on Jul 15, 2016 8:04:38 GMT -5
A vacation can really spell things out for you. Who plans most or all of it. Who decides how much to spend, where you will be going, when it will happen. Is there much communication at all. Do you feel like you could honestly, openly say what you are thinking, or feeling? Do you gat a voice,a say, or a vote on it?
Is it going to be the same dull experience that you have been dragging yourself along with all these years, just to make your spouse, or the "family", happy?
It becomes a mirror image of your every day life. You are either a walking teller machine, a baggage carrier, a baby sitter, or a cardboard prop to keep up the family image.
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Post by greatcoastal on Jul 15, 2016 8:27:54 GMT -5
Something our councilor had us do, was to both set up a weekend vacation..
My wife chose a condo. Along with hundreds of others. With a swimming pool and it's own little water park.
We took the whole family all eight of us.
I chose a cabin by a lake.
Just the two of us.
There is so much more to those two stories. Need I say more?
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Post by Isabellas39 on Jul 16, 2016 9:17:54 GMT -5
In the beginning of this sm mess everything felt depressing ...I'm guessing that vacations seems simple now because of the kids, and we don't sleep in the same bed. No expectations of anything other than having a good time sightseeing etc keeps one sane... I don't plan on going on vacations without kids .
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Post by Isabellas39 on Jul 16, 2016 11:52:03 GMT -5
I want to add one more thing about vacations since I'm on one right now...Sometimes, seeing couples that are close and touching all the time can get a bit depressing unless I make a conscious effort to ignore it all..I can relax and enjoy the sights and sounds, but romantic couples need to stay out of sight lol...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2016 12:17:57 GMT -5
I want to add one more thing about vacations since I'm on one right now...Sometimes, seeing couples that are close and touching all the time can get a bit depressing unless I make a conscious effort to ignore it all..I can relax and enjoy the sights and sounds, but romantic couples need to stay out of sight lol... Yes, to this, for sure. On my recent vacay, there was this adorable (middle-aged) couple on the beach at sunset. Caught them on camera (from afar) canoodling as they gazed at the sunset - it's a neat photo, if I do say so myself. Crushes my heart that I have no one to do that with. Kissing at sunset on the beach? Yes please!!! That, and then passionate sex in the hotel after. A girl could get used to that. Sadly, this girl dare not even dream of it. Far too painful. Chin up. Carry on. |
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Post by unmatched on Jul 16, 2016 12:29:32 GMT -5
I want to add one more thing about vacations since I'm on one right now...Sometimes, seeing couples that are close and touching all the time can get a bit depressing unless I make a conscious effort to ignore it all..I can relax and enjoy the sights and sounds, but romantic couples need to stay out of sight lol... I just got back from a vacation with two weddings in it. There were definitely some painful moments there, watching loved up couples dancing together, and also during the ceremony itself. It was like looking back at how we felt at the beginning vs where we are now. Although if I am honest until the last couple of years I think I had an incredibly vague idea of what I thought marriage was about and what I wanted from it. I am hopeful that I wouldn't repeat the same mistakes. (Different ones maybe lol?) |
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