Eight month update after separation from a sexless marriage
May 11, 2024 12:38:17 GMT -5
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greatcoastal, worksforme2, and 6 more like this
Post by even on May 11, 2024 12:38:17 GMT -5
Hi,
I haven’t been on here for a while. I missed here and appreciated all the support from this forum during my lowest point in my 5 years of sexless marriage. I decided to go to the direction of divorce with him and we are still living under the same roof for the seek of our daughter. Fortunately, we have a full furnished basement that he lives in, so we don’t have to interact much at all except communication regarding our daughter and finance.
Sexually, I had been with a guys 5 years younger than me for a couple times and he didn’t want to continue due to my situation (or else i don’t know and honestly I don’t care). I was on AM(a site to find non-string attached sex) before and then got banned for no reason. The only guy who added me on social medial from AM, we were continuing talking and then meeting up. He is still in college (the college I went to many years ago)and it is one of the best in Midwest. We get along well since both of us are interested in philosophy, psychology, science and reading boring books. I didn’t want to be with him sexually due to he is much much younger than me. But he insisted. So we have been having this once a week thing for about 7 months now. Sexually, we are very compatible. I know it is not going to last, since he is going to graduate and going somewhere else probably, but it is fun time with him.
I have dig deep into myself and my pain from last 5 years of sexless marriage. From the pain, I earned this unweaving love to myself now, which I appreciate and grow it everyday no matter the circumstances. I work out, practice hot yoga, read books and listen to music when I am not taking care of my daughter. I love and forgive, myself and others.
My ex-husband started to work out himself really hard, dropped 50lbs, and got his life together from what I see. He is no longer attached to the couch watching horror movies or playing games all day when he is home. He takes our daughter out to eat food and play all times now. He has social anxiety. During our 7 years of marriage, he refused to dine or play outside with me or our daughter. He went to see doctor regularly and got all his blood work back to normal, including blood pressure and testosterone.
I don’t think our marriage will ever be back together and I don’t want to lose my freedom and put faith in any artificial bondage relationship anymore. I see myself, life and relationship in a totally different light now. I am happy when I am alone (like now), with my daughter or with my lover or at work. I have nothing to demand from those around me anymore. I really appreciate the decision I made 8 months ago, and I appreciate people on this forum who gave me courage and discretion in that process.
I haven’t been on here for a while. I missed here and appreciated all the support from this forum during my lowest point in my 5 years of sexless marriage. I decided to go to the direction of divorce with him and we are still living under the same roof for the seek of our daughter. Fortunately, we have a full furnished basement that he lives in, so we don’t have to interact much at all except communication regarding our daughter and finance.
Sexually, I had been with a guys 5 years younger than me for a couple times and he didn’t want to continue due to my situation (or else i don’t know and honestly I don’t care). I was on AM(a site to find non-string attached sex) before and then got banned for no reason. The only guy who added me on social medial from AM, we were continuing talking and then meeting up. He is still in college (the college I went to many years ago)and it is one of the best in Midwest. We get along well since both of us are interested in philosophy, psychology, science and reading boring books. I didn’t want to be with him sexually due to he is much much younger than me. But he insisted. So we have been having this once a week thing for about 7 months now. Sexually, we are very compatible. I know it is not going to last, since he is going to graduate and going somewhere else probably, but it is fun time with him.
I have dig deep into myself and my pain from last 5 years of sexless marriage. From the pain, I earned this unweaving love to myself now, which I appreciate and grow it everyday no matter the circumstances. I work out, practice hot yoga, read books and listen to music when I am not taking care of my daughter. I love and forgive, myself and others.
My ex-husband started to work out himself really hard, dropped 50lbs, and got his life together from what I see. He is no longer attached to the couch watching horror movies or playing games all day when he is home. He takes our daughter out to eat food and play all times now. He has social anxiety. During our 7 years of marriage, he refused to dine or play outside with me or our daughter. He went to see doctor regularly and got all his blood work back to normal, including blood pressure and testosterone.
I don’t think our marriage will ever be back together and I don’t want to lose my freedom and put faith in any artificial bondage relationship anymore. I see myself, life and relationship in a totally different light now. I am happy when I am alone (like now), with my daughter or with my lover or at work. I have nothing to demand from those around me anymore. I really appreciate the decision I made 8 months ago, and I appreciate people on this forum who gave me courage and discretion in that process.
