Post by greatcoastal on Jan 8, 2024 8:48:05 GMT -5
medium.com/heart-affairs/the-true-reason-single-women-are-happier-than-single-men-08e741322ab4
The True Reason Single Women Are Happier Than Single Men
And what single men can do to increase their happiness.
Crystal Jackson
There are women out there who are single and don’t want to be, but as I talk to more single women about dating, I’ve noticed a common theme: More women are happily single.
Many of us are choosing to stay happily single instead of looking for a relationship. I wouldn’t say it’s universal, but it is becoming increasingly more common. As a single woman myself, I’ve spent some time thinking about why that is — and why men aren’t experiencing the same happiness while single.
The first thing that came to mind was gender inequality. It’s certainly a factor in why some women are choosing to thrive alone rather than bearing the burden of a partner who may not be self-sufficient. It’s certainly one important consideration, but I don’t think it’s the true reason that more women are embracing and enjoying the single life.
Women are happier single because of our friendships.
Women are more likely to travel together, make friend dates, and rely on one another for emotional support. We encourage each other, offer compliments freely, and support each other’s progress. We’re talking about what’s going on in our lives, leading us to feel less isolated. Men look for all of that in a romantic partner and are unlikely to seek that same level of support from male friends. Single women will happily embrace a Golden Girls lifestyle involving friends and shared experiences while men are seeking remarriage and long-term romantic partnership.
While many women are also looking for a partnership, we might experience less loneliness while single because of the strength of our friend groups. We certainly experience better health because of it. A study in the Journal of Clinical Oncology found that strong social support among women improved breast cancer treatment outcomes. The survival rate in the first few years improved drastically for those with larger friend groups. Research shows that friendship is linked to better health outcomes regardless of gender.
There is a significant difference between male & female friendships.
Many men share experiences with their male friends but don’t discuss their lives in-depth while female friendships rely on sharing and discussing thoughts, feelings, and life events. Further research has shown that men often talk over their problems with parents — if they talk them over at all — while women often rely on friendships to discuss problems that arise. Women receive more social support and encouragement than men do from friendships.
It’s no wonder that women report being happier single. We’ve built a strong network of connections that doesn’t rely exclusively on a romantic relationship. In contrast, many men are searching for relationships to meet these emotional needs because they aren’t receiving equivalent support from male friendships. The difference is staggering — particularly as more women are no longer willing to be the sole support system for men in romantic relationships.
“Some women pray for their daughters to marry good husbands. I pray that my girls will find girlfriends half as loyal and true as the Ya-Yas.” ~Rebecca Wells
Strong friendships insulate us & help us experience less loneliness.
Friendships and romantic relationships may have significant differences, but women often find emotional intimacy and connection with their friends. We’re not waiting around for a plus-one to secure that type of experience. Our friendships are deep and fulfilling, and while romantic partners come and go, our friends stick around with us through those changes. We get long-term support even when we’re not in a long-term partnership.
The patriarchy does men a great disservice by discouraging open affection and communication between male friends, particularly of the cis-gendered hetero-variety. In my female friendships, it’s not uncommon to hug, go on trips together, or even say that we love each other. Men aren’t often getting that kind of support, and it might be why they find the single state more uncomfortable and lonelier than women do.
Men would benefit from cultivating stronger relationships with their male friends. Scheduling regular friend dates, checking in with each other periodically, and discussing thoughts and feelings could go a long way to mitigating the loneliness of the single life. Being able to express open affection and rely on one another for support could change their experiences of being single.
Female friendships are a treasure, and I find myself increasingly grateful for the strong, smart, and funny women who are a part of my life. I don’t mind being single. Most days, I’m not a bit lonely. I know I can reach out to any one of my friends for comfort, support, or a laugh. We have a strong foundation of mutual trust, support, and affection that’s unaffected by the romantic relationships in our lives. It makes us happier — and might even make us live longer.
The True Reason Single Women Are Happier Than Single Men
And what single men can do to increase their happiness.
Crystal Jackson
There are women out there who are single and don’t want to be, but as I talk to more single women about dating, I’ve noticed a common theme: More women are happily single.
Many of us are choosing to stay happily single instead of looking for a relationship. I wouldn’t say it’s universal, but it is becoming increasingly more common. As a single woman myself, I’ve spent some time thinking about why that is — and why men aren’t experiencing the same happiness while single.
The first thing that came to mind was gender inequality. It’s certainly a factor in why some women are choosing to thrive alone rather than bearing the burden of a partner who may not be self-sufficient. It’s certainly one important consideration, but I don’t think it’s the true reason that more women are embracing and enjoying the single life.
Women are happier single because of our friendships.
Women are more likely to travel together, make friend dates, and rely on one another for emotional support. We encourage each other, offer compliments freely, and support each other’s progress. We’re talking about what’s going on in our lives, leading us to feel less isolated. Men look for all of that in a romantic partner and are unlikely to seek that same level of support from male friends. Single women will happily embrace a Golden Girls lifestyle involving friends and shared experiences while men are seeking remarriage and long-term romantic partnership.
While many women are also looking for a partnership, we might experience less loneliness while single because of the strength of our friend groups. We certainly experience better health because of it. A study in the Journal of Clinical Oncology found that strong social support among women improved breast cancer treatment outcomes. The survival rate in the first few years improved drastically for those with larger friend groups. Research shows that friendship is linked to better health outcomes regardless of gender.
There is a significant difference between male & female friendships.
Many men share experiences with their male friends but don’t discuss their lives in-depth while female friendships rely on sharing and discussing thoughts, feelings, and life events. Further research has shown that men often talk over their problems with parents — if they talk them over at all — while women often rely on friendships to discuss problems that arise. Women receive more social support and encouragement than men do from friendships.
It’s no wonder that women report being happier single. We’ve built a strong network of connections that doesn’t rely exclusively on a romantic relationship. In contrast, many men are searching for relationships to meet these emotional needs because they aren’t receiving equivalent support from male friendships. The difference is staggering — particularly as more women are no longer willing to be the sole support system for men in romantic relationships.
“Some women pray for their daughters to marry good husbands. I pray that my girls will find girlfriends half as loyal and true as the Ya-Yas.” ~Rebecca Wells
Strong friendships insulate us & help us experience less loneliness.
Friendships and romantic relationships may have significant differences, but women often find emotional intimacy and connection with their friends. We’re not waiting around for a plus-one to secure that type of experience. Our friendships are deep and fulfilling, and while romantic partners come and go, our friends stick around with us through those changes. We get long-term support even when we’re not in a long-term partnership.
The patriarchy does men a great disservice by discouraging open affection and communication between male friends, particularly of the cis-gendered hetero-variety. In my female friendships, it’s not uncommon to hug, go on trips together, or even say that we love each other. Men aren’t often getting that kind of support, and it might be why they find the single state more uncomfortable and lonelier than women do.
Men would benefit from cultivating stronger relationships with their male friends. Scheduling regular friend dates, checking in with each other periodically, and discussing thoughts and feelings could go a long way to mitigating the loneliness of the single life. Being able to express open affection and rely on one another for support could change their experiences of being single.
Female friendships are a treasure, and I find myself increasingly grateful for the strong, smart, and funny women who are a part of my life. I don’t mind being single. Most days, I’m not a bit lonely. I know I can reach out to any one of my friends for comfort, support, or a laugh. We have a strong foundation of mutual trust, support, and affection that’s unaffected by the romantic relationships in our lives. It makes us happier — and might even make us live longer.
