m76
Full Member
Posts: 416
|
Post by m76 on Sept 23, 2023 15:01:11 GMT -5
My wife is out of town this weekend and I'm finding I'm not missing her being here at all. In fact I slept better last night then I have in a long time. I can do what I want without answering any questions or being asked to do things. Maybe being alone isn't so bad.
|
|
|
|
Post by northstarmom on Sept 23, 2023 16:34:41 GMT -5
I encouraged my now ex to take a 9-month sabbatical in Asia while I remained in Florida. I was testing to see if I'd miss him. I did not miss him at all! I did lots of fun things with my friends, had a board game party, took dance classes and continued acting in community theater. When he came back, I picked him up at the airport and then took him to dinner. We barely had anything to say to each other. I realized I really was happier --much happier --without him. At that point, however, I didn't know that Florida is a community property state and we'd split all debts and inheritances so I feared the financial consequences of divorce. When, about 2 years later, I learned how property is split in Florida during a divorce, I divorced without any angst. It has now been 10 years since I divorced. I have never regretted it. The only time I missed him was once when I needed to reach something on a high shelf and needed to use the step ladder. We were married for 34 years.
Anyone here who's in a SM is lucky to have found thihs site before I did. I found ILIASM's predessor 2 weeks after my divorce was final. Most of the wisdom here are things I had to discover on my own.
|
|
|
|
Post by toughtiger on Sept 23, 2023 23:07:15 GMT -5
My wife is out of town this weekend and I'm finding I'm not missing her being here at all. In fact I slept better last night then I have in a long time. I can do what I want without answering any questions or being asked to do things. Maybe being alone isn't so bad. I think most of feel that way it becomes such a pain to even deal with them i sleep deeper and restful when away from him / no stress about what to eat of have in fridge etc... do my own thing / watch my own choice on tv or play music as loud as i want.... all works better when he is elsewhere. |
|
|
|
Post by h on Sept 24, 2023 6:23:23 GMT -5
My wife was out too and it was the best night's sleep I've had in a long time. She went to visit a highschool friend she hasn't seen in a while and stayed the night at her house. She almost never goes anywhere without me so it was a welcome treat.
|
|
|
|
Post by aquacat on Sept 24, 2023 17:29:43 GMT -5
I’ve noticed lately that I enjoy it when I’m home alone or when I go somewhere by myself. I’m getting to the point to where I do not enjoy going places with my wife.
When I’m alone I can take care of my libido as well and not deal with my wife showing disinterest.
|
|
diode
Junior Member
Posts: 78 
|
Post by diode on Sept 24, 2023 18:59:10 GMT -5
I spend considerable time alone. It's glorious by comparison, but I'd prefer to be with somebody who was OK with me.
|
|
|
|
Post by toughtiger on Sept 24, 2023 19:36:45 GMT -5
I spend considerable time alone. It's glorious by comparison, but I'd prefer to be with somebody who was OK with me. I know what you mean i would love to spend time with someone who is my partner/ my lover/ my confident..... instead i get a person who avoids me... never listens and then complains about it all. he decided to cook today told him easy on spice as pepper flakes are hotter then you think............ he yelled he knows what he is doing has gallons of crap inedible because he knows better lol it started with no sex but every little other item is making me crazy ...... i need a vacation away. |
|
|
|
Post by h on Sept 25, 2023 13:37:20 GMT -5
I spend considerable time alone. It's glorious by comparison, but I'd prefer to be with somebody who was OK with me. I know what you mean i would love to spend time with someone who is my partner/ my lover/ my confident..... instead i get a person who avoids me... never listens and then complains about it all. he decided to cook today told him easy on spice as pepper flakes are hotter then you think............ he yelled he knows what he is doing has gallons of crap inedible because he knows better lol it started with no sex but every little other item is making me crazy ...... i need a vacation away. The term we use here is "Zip Code Therapy" when you need to get away from your refuser. |
|
|
|
Post by aquacat on Sept 25, 2023 17:08:42 GMT -5
I may have to do that. I’m in a new state and would like to explore.
|
|
|
|
Post by isthisit on Sept 25, 2023 17:39:01 GMT -5
One of the drivers for me to call time on my marriage was when I was offered a fully paid trip to my favourite place on the planet and realised that I would prefer not to go than go with H. At the time I knew our marriage was in bad shape, but still, the realisation really shocked me.
Is that what the rest of my life looked like? Miss out on my passion for travel, or put up with his terrible company (and no sex) or be deceitful in making excuses to avoid going with him.
Instead, I chose to change my life and in doing so, changed my future. I still love to travel, and last week I clocked up my 10th holiday in 12 months. Life is pretty sweet today and I enjoy every moment.
|
|
diode
Junior Member
Posts: 78
|
Post by diode on Oct 1, 2023 19:28:57 GMT -5
I was out of town for a few days and just returned. It was (what has become) a regular trip to Florida.
Logan's next run will be in a few weeks, a month-long solo.
|
|
