Post by greatcoastal on Nov 3, 2022 20:32:19 GMT -5
I just had an eye opening experience!
I came home from the store to my 21 yr. old son crying on the couch. He got sucker punched and assaulted by three other men last night ( a whole nother story).
I sat down next to him, put my hand on his shoulder and comforted him the best I could. I've been ther for him the whole time, and will continue to be involved.
He told me " I just called mom ( my ex wife from my 25 yr SM) and she's too busy. She doesn't care at all. All I got from her was 'ugh-Hugh, ugh Hugh', nothing! She shows no care about how I am or what happened to me.
She acts like she doesn't have time, that her job, and what ever she wants to do is all that matters to her. That I will never be good enough for her, that I will never measure up!"
I'm done talking with her, trying to please her, It's never gonna happen, it's not worth it. She's so cold".
Wow.....I was speechless.
I had nothing to say, positive or negative. From the beginning of the divorce I tried diligently to not talk bad about their mother, to not be like her, to take the high road.
I changed the subject. It didn't last. He went right back about " I just won't have much communication with her anymore".
The bad part is he still has to communicate with her when it comes to his healthcare.
My thoughts where " welcome to my world, when it comes to dealing with your mom". But I keep it to myself. My son is the one who will most likely say tomorrow, " I understand more and more why you have nothing to do with mom."
Not the nicest thing to 'bond' over, but it is part of reality. How different we two parents handle things- like night and day.
I came home from the store to my 21 yr. old son crying on the couch. He got sucker punched and assaulted by three other men last night ( a whole nother story).
I sat down next to him, put my hand on his shoulder and comforted him the best I could. I've been ther for him the whole time, and will continue to be involved.
He told me " I just called mom ( my ex wife from my 25 yr SM) and she's too busy. She doesn't care at all. All I got from her was 'ugh-Hugh, ugh Hugh', nothing! She shows no care about how I am or what happened to me.
She acts like she doesn't have time, that her job, and what ever she wants to do is all that matters to her. That I will never be good enough for her, that I will never measure up!"
I'm done talking with her, trying to please her, It's never gonna happen, it's not worth it. She's so cold".
Wow.....I was speechless.
I had nothing to say, positive or negative. From the beginning of the divorce I tried diligently to not talk bad about their mother, to not be like her, to take the high road.
I changed the subject. It didn't last. He went right back about " I just won't have much communication with her anymore".
The bad part is he still has to communicate with her when it comes to his healthcare.
My thoughts where " welcome to my world, when it comes to dealing with your mom". But I keep it to myself. My son is the one who will most likely say tomorrow, " I understand more and more why you have nothing to do with mom."
Not the nicest thing to 'bond' over, but it is part of reality. How different we two parents handle things- like night and day.
