|
|
Post by ironhamster on Sept 3, 2021 16:27:39 GMT -5
The idea of inertia doesn't just apply to mass and motion. It's a factor in our daily lives, too. We get into the groove in a particular job and may not even look for other, better positions elsewhere, because we are content to stay the course. It's too disruptive to make a change that may or may not be good for us when we are happy enough following the path we are on. This applies to our relationships, also. We get married, and stay the course because that's the path we chose, and changing that path is troublesome.
Covid changed that for a lot of people. The rest of the world didn't allow us to just keep going. The world stopped. As much as that sucked, it gave people time to reassess the paths they were on. In addition to people changing jobs or careers in droves, divorce rates skyrocketed.
In my case, a pandemic style shutdown might have done me a lot of good. I'd like to think that, just maybe, I might have recognized the incompatibility issues if given more time to stop and see if I was smelling the roses, or if the plants were all dead and the only smell was the natural fertilizer in the garden. Apparently, given the spike in divorce, many people did that and found the odor of the relationship unbearable.
I'm glad for the people making big changes in their lives. If there is one good thing to come out of this pandemic, it's that it gave people a chance to assess the direction their lives were taking and set a better path.
Someday, in the history books, I may quoted as a reminiscent old timer. "Ah, yes. 2020 was a wonderful year for both job changes and divorce, and I wish we could have another one like it."
|
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Sept 4, 2021 21:07:55 GMT -5
Where did you get your information about divorce rates skyrocketed? Just curious. I was wondering if the shut down of the family court systems around the country (almost a year?) lead to a huge backlog? Making it look like a sudden increase in the number of cases? It's really hard to trust ANY news source lately!
I'm sure that people had many eye opening experiences being forced into staying home with each other for months at a time. A good test of a loving, trusting, intimate, respectful relationship!
|
|
|
|
Inertia
Sept 4, 2021 21:58:40 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by ironhamster on Sept 4, 2021 21:58:40 GMT -5
Where did you get your information about divorce rates skyrocketed? Just curious. I was wondering if the shut down of the family court systems around the country (almost a year?) lead to a huge backlog? Making it look like a sudden increase in the number of cases? It's really hard to trust ANY news source lately! I'm sure that people had many eye opening experiences being forced into staying home with each other for months at a time. A good test of a loving, trusting, intimate, respectful relationship! I will agree that it's hard to trust any new sources. I certainly don't trust any of the old ones. For what it's worth, I searched the internet and found the divorce rate ticked up about 30%. I think that's especially telling, since the courts were trying to figure out how to function during a pandemic. Assuming they figured it out quickly and there was no backlog, it's still a significant increase. I've seen some high numbers on company turnovers, too. In my youth I worked fast food. Our turnover was so high that by the time I had been there three months I was an oldtimer, but that was a business built around low level skills. For a company that takes months to get an employee up to speed, losing a third of their workforce is devastating. |
|
|
|
Inertia
Sept 5, 2021 13:25:12 GMT -5
Post by northstarmom on Sept 5, 2021 13:25:12 GMT -5
Story from March, 2021: "Divorces from coast to coast have slowed considerably in the last 12 months, according to lawyers, relationship coaches in New York, and records kept by the Superior Court of California. Though New York State keeps its divorce records sealed, the Superior Court of California tracks family law data in each of its 58 counties, including Los Angeles, where divorce filings are down 17.3 percent from the previous rolling year, as 12,750 people filed for divorce from March 2, 2020, to Feb. 26, 2021, compared to 15,222 who filed in Los Angeles the previous year. “We had a surge in divorces in the early months of the pandemic, but now we seem to be seeing a plummeting,” said Harriet N. Cohen, a divorce lawyer who founded Cohen Stine Kapoor in Manhattan. “Ironically, the same vaccines that will hopefully return life to normal, will also prove to be the catalyst for a new rise in divorces,” Ms. Cohen said.” We have no doubt that divorces will surge again, but for now, uncertainty is the order of the day.”" www.nytimes.com/2021/03/24/style/divorce-rates-dropping.html |
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Sept 5, 2021 17:13:21 GMT -5
Covid also changed many incomes among married couples. Those of us who have gone through the SM, also know that $$$ is at the top of the list for causing divorce. Everything from people earning more money, to losing money due to Covid changes. From working at the office to working at home. Extra income from the government, and deciding how to spend it, to losing both incomes and deciding how to cut the spending.
Yes the almighty $$$ can sure bring out a person's true colors and show where their priorities are in a relationship!
|
|
|
|
Inertia
Sept 6, 2021 2:36:40 GMT -5
Post by baza on Sept 6, 2021 2:36:40 GMT -5
In my jurisdiction, the latest available figures are for 2019 - pre covid.
In 2019 there were 113,815 new marriages recorded.
There were 49,116 "old" marriages ended.
Provisional data up to June 2020 reveal that the rate of new marriages had DECLINED by 31.9 % so covid restrictions have had a dramatic effect in that area.
And probably - after assorted lock downs with spouses under each others feet because of covid - the divorce rate will escalate significantly in months yet to come.
|
|
