Leaning towards staying....however
Aug 14, 2021 8:13:31 GMT -5
jim44444, Handy, and 3 more like this
Post by lonelycat on Aug 14, 2021 8:13:31 GMT -5
Howdy,
An update on my situation, so much as happened in the last 6 months. The person that first joined this Forum is not the same person that seats here 5 am (California). There been a lot of talks, a lot of crying, passive aggressive behavior from both of us. I decided to look for a lover, which by the way it is a part time job, just unbelievable the amount of bullshit you go through. I would think it would so much simpler.
I created an account @ Ashley Madison, didn't disclose too much but was very specific on what I was looking for. Got a number of response, made my choice and started communicating with "someone", I will call him the "Nurse". Spend quite an amount of time exchanging emails, I told him my sad story and he told me his sad story...when was time to meet for coffee, POOF! The guy disappeared on me. To this day I have no idea who I was really talking to. I was soooo pissed off a)I already have suffered enough with sexual rejection and this asshole does something like this? b)The amount of time I spend/invest in this potential candidate.
After my ego healed, I decided to give it a try with my second choice. The Attorney/Partner guy. I actually know him for about 10 years, long story, he is in a similar situation. His wife is very sick, being in a sexless marriage for years (I suspect he always had someone on the side). Anyways, I couldn't pursue anything intimated with him: a) I am not physically attracted to him b) I didn't know how much damage years and years have done to my self esteem, mental health. I like him, he is funny, a proper gentleman but I just couldn't do it. If I am going to take this route, the outsourcing route, I figure that it's got be worth it, there's got to be physical attraction.
Anyways, onto my third "option", the hot firefighter! With me being somewhat wiser on this whole process, I haven't exchange too much time communicating with him. I did met him for coffee and he is the proverbial, tall, dark and handsome. There seems some kind sadness in him mixed with some kind mischievous. Nothing physically happened between us, he is on his busy season, I mean it is fire season in California.
Parts of me feel bad writing how I had a selection, it makes me feel like I went to the pound and was selecting what abandoned dog I was going to bring home. Part of the whole AM experience was helpful on my ego, I am still attractive, I still got it. Also it made me realized the damage of years and years of rejection have done and is something I am addressing with my therapist. Oh, by the way after a month the Nurse guy wrote saying "hi" like nothing happened. Reaaally?
. What a moron.
So, yeah... I have been busy
PS: If you are being judgmental about my decision to outsource, please those comments to yourself!
An update on my situation, so much as happened in the last 6 months. The person that first joined this Forum is not the same person that seats here 5 am (California). There been a lot of talks, a lot of crying, passive aggressive behavior from both of us. I decided to look for a lover, which by the way it is a part time job, just unbelievable the amount of bullshit you go through. I would think it would so much simpler.
I created an account @ Ashley Madison, didn't disclose too much but was very specific on what I was looking for. Got a number of response, made my choice and started communicating with "someone", I will call him the "Nurse". Spend quite an amount of time exchanging emails, I told him my sad story and he told me his sad story...when was time to meet for coffee, POOF! The guy disappeared on me. To this day I have no idea who I was really talking to. I was soooo pissed off a)I already have suffered enough with sexual rejection and this asshole does something like this? b)The amount of time I spend/invest in this potential candidate.
After my ego healed, I decided to give it a try with my second choice. The Attorney/Partner guy. I actually know him for about 10 years, long story, he is in a similar situation. His wife is very sick, being in a sexless marriage for years (I suspect he always had someone on the side). Anyways, I couldn't pursue anything intimated with him: a) I am not physically attracted to him b) I didn't know how much damage years and years have done to my self esteem, mental health. I like him, he is funny, a proper gentleman but I just couldn't do it. If I am going to take this route, the outsourcing route, I figure that it's got be worth it, there's got to be physical attraction.
Anyways, onto my third "option", the hot firefighter! With me being somewhat wiser on this whole process, I haven't exchange too much time communicating with him. I did met him for coffee and he is the proverbial, tall, dark and handsome. There seems some kind sadness in him mixed with some kind mischievous. Nothing physically happened between us, he is on his busy season, I mean it is fire season in California.
Parts of me feel bad writing how I had a selection, it makes me feel like I went to the pound and was selecting what abandoned dog I was going to bring home. Part of the whole AM experience was helpful on my ego, I am still attractive, I still got it. Also it made me realized the damage of years and years of rejection have done and is something I am addressing with my therapist. Oh, by the way after a month the Nurse guy wrote saying "hi" like nothing happened. Reaaally?
. What a moron.So, yeah... I have been busy
PS: If you are being judgmental about my decision to outsource, please those comments to yourself!
