You gotta make a move sometime. You cant wait for ideal time. Just the time when you can survive and not get royally screwed hopefully. When I threw the dirtbag out, I was a month and a half into a job after not being able to find a job for almost a year after graduating and moving. I had 1 small group of acquaintances besides my coworkers, no friends in the area. I got a crappy cheap apartment once I got the job and then I threw him out. It wasn't ideal. It wasn't the plan. But ideal would not have happened and waiting would have just caused more pain. Ideal came after I left. Yeah I had to wait, but sure was easier to wait being away from home and when I actually was getting laid.
Saarinista, the key is proximity to a potential partner for me. Get me close enough (mileage wise) to a potential partner and things might just might progress rather quickly.
I used to read the profiles on POF but found no one my age or locally if they were close to my age, so I quit looking. I also automatically assumed anyone more than 5 years younger than me wouldn't be interested in me. I guess I became sensitive to the women that posted guys only want younger women and I was thinking I wasn't going to be a trophy / arm candy (the woman is arm candy) picking guy.
OK, so I am risk adverse. I don't want things to go bad for the parties involved. Put you and I in the same town and I am reasonably confident we could work something out. But that isn't how life is most of the time.
I am truly happy for Shamwow and BOC that they could travel and work out things in their online relationship.
Handy I think you need to figure out whether you'll ever be available fully to any woman or if you are going just stay married no matter what, and hence, just looking for an affair.
If you can't even tell a potential partner whether you would ever consider anything more than a no- strings sexual relationship, you're not likely to be very attractive. The vast majority of women will avoid getting entangled with you if you don't know whether you want just sex, or if you are open to a relationship if you end up actually liking one other as people.
There are other questions and considerations, but you seem to be avoiding answering the biggest one, to wit: what are you looking for?
Please forgive any typos or poor sentence structure. As I often say, you can have it perfect or you can have it now. Here, I choose now.
Saarinista you seem to be avoiding answering the biggest one, to wit: what are you looking for?
I was thinking about what I want and came up with an idea. That idea or concern is I can want what I want but if it is not on the menu, what are the chances of getting what I want?
This is in reference to "what I want" LTR and what does the other person want or is happy to offer. This is why I listed a FWB on a post I made. I realize wanting a particular thing does not mean that is what I get.
Maybe I only sometimes get what I want and settle close or for good enough on a regular basis.
This the "Shoutbox" -- basically a site-wide, group chat. (It's only visible to members.)
petrushka: Even her little 5 or 6 year old was questioning her purchase!
Mar 14, 2020 6:25:44 GMT -5
petrushka: One of my favourite quotes for the last 30 years: "don't ever look a sheep in the eyes, the intellectual vacuum may suck your brains out". Well, let's all drink to the sheeple! (besides, alcohol is a good disinfectant).
Mar 14, 2020 6:31:26 GMT -5
frednsa: so...............i'd like to tell her when she "attempts to placate me": have you ever been invited to a party where you knew for certain that you WEREN'T wanted ?
Mar 19, 2020 15:57:05 GMT -5
worksforme2: Former Miss Hawaii tests positive. Being the gallant lad that I am I have offered her the use of my guest bedroom to "shelter in place"..
Mar 23, 2020 20:34:21 GMT -5
worksforme2: Hey tamara68, there is a covid19 positive cat in Belgium, watch out for it.
Mar 30, 2020 14:05:56 GMT -5
tamara68: @worksforme I think I have to be more careful for all infected people. Most likely I already have Covid19
Apr 1, 2020 3:29:42 GMT -5
worksforme2: tamara68.....it's been a couple weeks since you posted you may have the covid19 virus. hopefully you are feeling better and are on your way to renewed health
Apr 11, 2020 5:31:38 GMT -5
tamara68: @worksforme thanks, yes I am feeling better. How is it in the USA?
Apr 14, 2020 1:57:26 GMT -5
worksforme2: some better and some worse,..virus seems to be slowing down, but people are beginning to refuse to stay inside,...worst thing I see is Biden leading in the election poles,...but that could be fake news
Apr 20, 2020 16:56:22 GMT -5
mirrororchid: Politics? Is that what we want to happen here?
Apr 21, 2020 6:21:24 GMT -5
petrushka: Certainly not American style politics. Toxic echo chambers.
Apr 23, 2020 16:21:52 GMT -5
petrushka: However, I feel that sexual politics, including political moves that impact the relationships between gender (misogynist, misandrist, etc) definitely deserve room in this context.
Apr 23, 2020 16:22:59 GMT -5
fred: just calculated that i've spent somewhere near 19,000 days (& nights) as a "rejectee".AND that allows for 2,000+ days (& nights) on business travel apart from her. i've chosen to "stay" .....would never do that again, and can't as you see doing the math
May 15, 2020 18:01:15 GMT -5
worksforme2: 19000 days and nights,....damn dude, that's 52 yrs.
Jun 17, 2020 9:19:10 GMT -5
fred: you're a little short works - was thinking this AM, there has NEVER been a day when she indicated desire for me physically (other than for heavy lifting or finance)........LOL...........earlier, i had enough libido for both of us, now i'm left with guilt
Jun 20, 2020 13:11:12 GMT -5
fred: over imposing myself on her rather than simply leaving .....DAMN LOVE ANYWAY !
Jun 20, 2020 13:12:12 GMT -5
mesulina: update everyone, still has not happened. I have now come to accept that I will live with out. It is just different now.
Jun 29, 2020 19:32:31 GMT -5
worksforme2: Sorry mesulina,... but on the positive side you did stock up on toys a short time back,..now might be the time to go for the gusto
Jun 30, 2020 17:42:54 GMT -5
grower: Embrace a change, you will wonder why you waited so long
Jul 9, 2020 11:22:56 GMT -5
grower: Your life clock is ticking away, don't waste all your time. Live some.
Jul 24, 2020 9:53:20 GMT -5