End of Summer Reflections... healing from the fire
Aug 23, 2019 16:50:10 GMT -5
via mobile
DryCreek, jim44444, and 9 more like this
Post by WindSister on Aug 23, 2019 16:50:10 GMT -5
This is my first time logging in since my weird posts this spring. I was too embarrassed to even read the responses and I still haven't. I apologize. Just writing, alone, is often all the therapy and insight I need.
I had a quiet afternoon by myself today cleaning our new home we moved into on June 25th. A song came on that brought back memories of my SM and this group and had me reflecting on how my now husband and I have fared through life's challenges.
The song is by Rodney Atkins.... "Waiting on a Good Day." It's about a dead relationship but the couple is waiting on a good day to say goodbye. Ouch. BTDT.
Then it brought me to now.... and going through tragedy as a couple. It can really test even the happiest of couples.
We actually came to blows a month ago.... but it was what we needed. We stood face to face, toe to toe and let it all go. In the end, we were still there for each other. Still in love. Since then we have been back to "us".... respectful, forgiving, thinking the best of each other instead of the worse. Patient with each other. I'm so thankful.
We are done accumulating "stuff" again. Oh, that was hard for me... just constant buying and shopping. We still have a lot to buy, though, as we have no winter coats, boots, clothes. But that's minor and will actually be fun. I love winter. Bring it. I get new skis, too. But the house stuff? That was tedious and exhausting for me.
I'm grateful we had the insurance. Don't get me wrong. But it's a huge reminder.... money doesn't bring happiness. New stuff doesn't fill voids in ourselves. It was just busy, necessary work. Some of the stress between us was his need to get back to normal "now" and me needing to go slower. But... we worked through it.
Finally we are just living again. It's been quite the journey. We go on our first camping trip in two weeks, finally. I haven't had nearly enough time in the woods.
He bought everything to build a new sauna. That freaks me out as much as this Finn identifies and loves the sauna. But it wasn't the saunas fault and life goes on.
I love our new house while simultaneously missing so much of the one we lost. It's a weird journey.
Once the new wears off everything in it maybe it will start feeling like home more and more. We have deeply grateful moments here and feel a future together here. We have hopes and dreams for this place.
Anyway.... that's my check in. I feel for those who are still in the throes of an unhappy relationship and also facing challenges. Man, life is a ride.
We had a hiccup but I love my husband, respect him and I'm deeply grateful we keep choosing us. I actually feel closer and stronger. The fact we don't run away when things hurt or are hard is a positive sign.
Sex? Non issue. That never stopped. It also doesn't guarantee everything is roses. It takes two working on it to keep the relationship going.
Anyway.... keep plugging along.
I had a quiet afternoon by myself today cleaning our new home we moved into on June 25th. A song came on that brought back memories of my SM and this group and had me reflecting on how my now husband and I have fared through life's challenges.
The song is by Rodney Atkins.... "Waiting on a Good Day." It's about a dead relationship but the couple is waiting on a good day to say goodbye. Ouch. BTDT.
Then it brought me to now.... and going through tragedy as a couple. It can really test even the happiest of couples.
We actually came to blows a month ago.... but it was what we needed. We stood face to face, toe to toe and let it all go. In the end, we were still there for each other. Still in love. Since then we have been back to "us".... respectful, forgiving, thinking the best of each other instead of the worse. Patient with each other. I'm so thankful.
We are done accumulating "stuff" again. Oh, that was hard for me... just constant buying and shopping. We still have a lot to buy, though, as we have no winter coats, boots, clothes. But that's minor and will actually be fun. I love winter. Bring it. I get new skis, too. But the house stuff? That was tedious and exhausting for me.
I'm grateful we had the insurance. Don't get me wrong. But it's a huge reminder.... money doesn't bring happiness. New stuff doesn't fill voids in ourselves. It was just busy, necessary work. Some of the stress between us was his need to get back to normal "now" and me needing to go slower. But... we worked through it.
Finally we are just living again. It's been quite the journey. We go on our first camping trip in two weeks, finally. I haven't had nearly enough time in the woods.
He bought everything to build a new sauna. That freaks me out as much as this Finn identifies and loves the sauna. But it wasn't the saunas fault and life goes on.
I love our new house while simultaneously missing so much of the one we lost. It's a weird journey.
Once the new wears off everything in it maybe it will start feeling like home more and more. We have deeply grateful moments here and feel a future together here. We have hopes and dreams for this place.
Anyway.... that's my check in. I feel for those who are still in the throes of an unhappy relationship and also facing challenges. Man, life is a ride.
We had a hiccup but I love my husband, respect him and I'm deeply grateful we keep choosing us. I actually feel closer and stronger. The fact we don't run away when things hurt or are hard is a positive sign.
Sex? Non issue. That never stopped. It also doesn't guarantee everything is roses. It takes two working on it to keep the relationship going.
Anyway.... keep plugging along.
