You know, I spend every day, every hour in my head. It's as comfortable as an old couch. I am content in here. None of that obsessive worrying-about-stuff that the author lists. No obsessive going around and around in loops and circles.
For me, living in my head means learning things, looking around for interesting stuff, thinking, planning, how to deal with people and things and projects. All in my head. Reading a lot and getting into other people's heads in the process.
Nothing, absolutely fucking nothing wrong with spending lots of time in my head.
You can choose how you see the world, your world. You can choose not to worry about things you can't change, you can choose not to give a rat's arse about how [the wrong] people might think about you. You can learn to be creative and constructive in your head and how to enjoy the view.
Actually it boils down largely to some of the things he says in his other write-up you linked: be self reliant, have a sense, a secure sense, of self worth. Know your mind, your goals, your likes and your needs. If I take care of my goals, likes and needs then there's no need for lying in bed, worrying. And if something DOES bug me, I make a plan and sort it out, so I don't have to worry about it any more. End of.
Nothing wrong with living in your head .... so long as you organize it right. And if you own your shit (and your mistakes and fuck ups) you can if needed, apologize and get on with life. Mistakes are part of life.
A lot of women in my life have had a big problem with that. They said "You fucked up". And I say "You're right, I fucked up. Mea culpa. I am sorry. I will try not to do it again". Life goes on, and I'll try not to do it again. But it's not enough. They couldn't accept that I can accept my mistakes, and don't cringe and cry and grovel going round and round. Life is too short. I own my shit, I take responsibility, and I look forward to doing better tomorrow. If they can't accept it, then it's their problem.
Living in my head 24/7 is very comfortable indeed.
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tamara68: @worksforme I think I have to be more careful for all infected people. Most likely I already have Covid19
Apr 1, 2020 3:29:42 GMT -5
worksforme2: tamara68.....it's been a couple weeks since you posted you may have the covid19 virus. hopefully you are feeling better and are on your way to renewed health
Apr 11, 2020 5:31:38 GMT -5
tamara68: @worksforme thanks, yes I am feeling better. How is it in the USA?
Apr 14, 2020 1:57:26 GMT -5
worksforme2: some better and some worse,..virus seems to be slowing down, but people are beginning to refuse to stay inside,...worst thing I see is Biden leading in the election poles,...but that could be fake news
Apr 20, 2020 16:56:22 GMT -5
mirrororchid: Politics? Is that what we want to happen here?
Apr 21, 2020 6:21:24 GMT -5
petrushka: Certainly not American style politics. Toxic echo chambers.
Apr 23, 2020 16:21:52 GMT -5
petrushka: However, I feel that sexual politics, including political moves that impact the relationships between gender (misogynist, misandrist, etc) definitely deserve room in this context.
Apr 23, 2020 16:22:59 GMT -5
fred: just calculated that i've spent somewhere near 19,000 days (& nights) as a "rejectee".AND that allows for 2,000+ days (& nights) on business travel apart from her. i've chosen to "stay" .....would never do that again, and can't as you see doing the math
May 15, 2020 18:01:15 GMT -5
worksforme2: 19000 days and nights,....damn dude, that's 52 yrs.
Jun 17, 2020 9:19:10 GMT -5
fred: you're a little short works - was thinking this AM, there has NEVER been a day when she indicated desire for me physically (other than for heavy lifting or finance)........LOL...........earlier, i had enough libido for both of us, now i'm left with guilt
Jun 20, 2020 13:11:12 GMT -5
fred: over imposing myself on her rather than simply leaving .....DAMN LOVE ANYWAY !
Jun 20, 2020 13:12:12 GMT -5
mesulina: update everyone, still has not happened. I have now come to accept that I will live with out. It is just different now.
Jun 29, 2020 19:32:31 GMT -5
worksforme2: Sorry mesulina,... but on the positive side you did stock up on toys a short time back,..now might be the time to go for the gusto
Jun 30, 2020 17:42:54 GMT -5
grower: Embrace a change, you will wonder why you waited so long
Jul 9, 2020 11:22:56 GMT -5
grower: Your life clock is ticking away, don't waste all your time. Live some.
Jul 24, 2020 9:53:20 GMT -5
fred: blue guy, i was where you are 30 years ago. stayed.................nothing changed. if i didn't love this nice lady so much i'd be in deep regret. if she doesn't think of you in a hundred "other" ways (as does my wife) GET OUT ! Life is short
Aug 10, 2020 17:43:15 GMT -5
jerri: Yuk on the plucking chicken feathers. If a chicken doesn't get sex and intimacy she just finds a beautiful cock sooner or later. I'd say there's a much higher "philandering" rate than anyone would care to admit. The rooster who is tormented findsa chicken!
Sept 10, 2020 8:23:56 GMT -5
csl: And yet, there is an entire segment of ILIASM stayers.
Sept 10, 2020 22:04:05 GMT -5
jerri: Exactly I have read multiple threads. I was very impressed with all the different solutions everyone has found. Intellectual group and the camaraderie is nice
Sept 11, 2020 9:44:57 GMT -5