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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 10:10:52 GMT -5
Today is my 29th anniversary for my first marriage.
Since then, a long term cohabitation ended, and I had a second divorce.
Three strikes you're out. I am done with relationships. I'm in a happy one now, and this is it. If this one goes to hell too I'm not going to get into another.
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 11:41:24 GMT -5
I don't know whether to congratulate you on your anniversary or not, @phinheasgage.
So...Happy Monday, hon!!
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 14:09:59 GMT -5
I'm with you Mr. Gage. 3 strikes = out. I'm not sure I even want 2, if this one fails. Point taken!!
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Post by wewbwb on May 23, 2016 15:27:25 GMT -5
I agree - although I would LIKE a committed LTR I have my doubts about marriage. But We'll see.
I could be wrong.
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 15:36:12 GMT -5
Well...you never know. In general I agree. But life can surprise you sometimes.
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Post by bballgirl on May 23, 2016 17:12:30 GMT -5
You know in baseball you can foul it off and stay alive at strike two, but my advice would be not to think like that and just enjoy the good thing you have going on!!
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Post by obobfla on May 23, 2016 18:45:48 GMT -5
I have had one. Probably would like to have another, but it depends who I pair with first. I know it's possible to have a great marriage, and I think I have what it takes. But I do have to pick a better partner next time.
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Post by Isabellas39 on May 27, 2016 11:46:09 GMT -5
I enjoy being in a relationship, but marriage I don't believe I would do again..
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Post by Deleted on May 27, 2016 12:09:09 GMT -5
I have had one. Probably would like to have another, but it depends who I pair with first. I know it's possible to have a great marriage, and I think I have what it takes. But I do have to pick a better partner next time. Exactly. So many people in sexless marriages, and indeed in bad marriages in general, are there because they made a huge mistake in who they married. A person who decides to go to bat again had better figure out why they made the bad choice the first time around and not make it again. Some people are misled, manipulated, or bait and switched, but with others, there are certain personality types that are perfect matches made in hell, and they seek each other out maybe even without thinking about it. Like an enabler and a mommy's boy. Or a fixer and a train wreck. Or two people who grew up in dysfunctional families and therefore have no sense of boundaries and where you end and I begin. On and on. I love that picture in another thread of two naked seniors running off the end of a pier and jumping into the water hand in hand. That's marriage to the right person. Marriage to the wrong person, well we all know what that looks like. |
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Post by GeekGoddess on May 31, 2016 15:02:56 GMT -5
I no longer think marriage is a true option for me. I tried it. I "interviewed" for 8 years before I bent my knee and proposed. I/we had what I thought was a good marriage for a long time - - say, most of 10 years. Unfortunately, I was actually married for 17 years! Now that I am out, I'm a solo show for a bit. If there develops other relationships, great. If all I ever really get to next is a series of FWB or hook-ups, well, so be it. I don't think I'll ever be tempted to marry again though.
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Post by darstar on Jun 8, 2016 20:15:39 GMT -5
Marriage bashing seems to be a hobby for a lot of people estranged a few times. I see it all differently , being married 3 times and it may be time to exit the third , it's al about life, no real regrets. You short change yourself when you complain about your past relationships. Too me , each and everyone was a mixture of good, wonderful, learning times. Even the bad times were a learning experience you do not want to replete ....mostly we do it all over again anyway. Life is too short, I truly have to say, I loved them all , even the one night stands. I love women, they have taught me a lot these past 55 years, things that changed me, that helped me be successful , sad , broke and just about everything life could offer........its been interesting, I would do it all over again.....with a few adjustments .
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Post by baza on Jun 9, 2016 1:31:37 GMT -5
My thinking is similar Brother phin.
If enna and my deal goes guts up, I cannot presently envisage having another crack at a full on relationship.
But bear in mind I am an old guy now, my thinking may have been different years ago.
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I read the odd story in here about internet (and standard) dating from some of the members, and I think - "good on you for having a crack, but I truly couldn't be fucked with it all."
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