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Post by greatcoastal on Sept 3, 2018 7:51:34 GMT -5
last night I ran into a platonic friend (my home inspector) at Wal -mart . He had his two younger daughters with him. I haven't seen him since he inspected the house I bought (6 months ago). We have the same attorney.
His STBX is an alcoholic, he told me she was beating on him again. ( Physical abuse ,and he is a big man) His mediation is next week, he said," I don't think it will go anywhere, she won't agree to anything". He went on to say, " This is the 3rd time, I won't call the police on her because the kids are in the house and I don't want them to see that happen".
Instantly my mind races with quotes, and warnings for him!
It's great to give someone else help. It makes you feel that your entire divorce wasn't done without a purpose, that you learned a lot from it and should pass it along. Yet, it seems like more negative news, as people go "through" the negative times.
my final words where " you will get through it, things will be much better, you will need time to heal".
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Post by northstarmom on Sept 3, 2018 9:54:23 GMT -5
If you haven’t yet, suggest that he get involved online or irl with Al-anon, the support group for people whose lives are affected by others’ drinking. There’s also Al-ateen for kids.
And he also could get support from hotlines for domestic abuse victims.
And if she’s physically abusing him, a big man, she may be doing the same to the kids. Even their exposure to his abuse could lead to their having ptsd.
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Post by baza on Sept 4, 2018 3:07:25 GMT -5
*You* Brother greatcoastal , will not be able to sort this friends problem for him. *He* sorts out his problem, or it doesn't get sorted out. Just as this *friend* will not be able to be able to sort out his missus problem for her. *She* sorts out her problem, or it doesn't get sorted out. But its' good that you could, and did, offer him some support and empathy. Given what you have gone through, you'd have some cred with this bloke, and I'd bet he appreciates your input. What he now does (or doesn't do) is on him. |
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Post by csl on Sept 5, 2018 8:21:01 GMT -5
If she hits him, call the police!!
It's that simple.
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Post by greatcoastal on Sept 5, 2018 8:23:38 GMT -5
If she hits him, call the police!! It's that simple. LOL!!! |
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Post by twotimesone on Sept 5, 2018 8:43:38 GMT -5
Since when wives gets arrested for beating their husbands?
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Post by northstarmom on Sept 5, 2018 10:44:50 GMT -5
In answer to twotimesone question: "Men are responsible for most cases of domestic violence, but women are three times more likely to be arrested for incidents of abuse, research reveals today.,,, But in general, women were three times more likely to be arrested: during the six-year period, men were arrested once in every 10 incidents and women arrested once in every three. www.theguardian.com/society/2009/aug/28/women-arrested-domestic-violence |
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Post by twotimesone on Sept 5, 2018 11:48:31 GMT -5
In answer to twotimesone question: "Men are responsible for most cases of domestic violence, but women are three times more likely to be arrested for incidents of abuse, research reveals today.,,, But in general, women were three times more likely to be arrested: during the six-year period, men were arrested once in every 10 incidents and women arrested once in every three. www.theguardian.com/society/2009/aug/28/women-arrested-domestic-violenceProbably true, but according to wikipedia, less than 1% of domestic violence are reported to the police by men. And yes, I know mostly women are the victims and they are mostly likely to be more injured or killed. "Studies have found that men are much less likely to report victimization in these situations.[39] According to some studies, less than 1% of domestic violence cases are reported to the police.[40][41] In the United States 10–35% of the population will be physically aggressive towards a partner at some point in their lives.[24][42][43] As abuse becomes more severe women become increasingly overrepresented as victims.[42] The National Violence Against Women Survey for 2000 reported that 25% of women and 7.6% of men reported being victims of intimate partner violence at some point in their lives.[44] The rate of intimate partner violence in the U. S. has declined since 1993.[45]" |
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