|
|
Post by elynne on Apr 10, 2018 0:30:34 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by baza on Apr 10, 2018 1:31:54 GMT -5
Presupposing that you have a normal spouse, and presupposing you got onto this problem early, REAL early, these 7 steps the erstwhile "Guy Winch PhD" proposes are gold.
In fact, IF you have a normal spouse and IF you got onto it real early, and IF it was fixable, you almost certainly fixed it back then, and maybe just need a tune up now and then to maintain things.
And you would not even be a member of this group.
However, you ARE here - as are we all.
Your (our) ILIASM deals were / are missing the "normal" spouse ingredient, plus -
(a) - were never fixable (the problem being there from the get go)
(b) - were allowed to become so entrenched over the years that they drifted into non fixable status after a decade or so. (intervention too late)
But, sure, try Guy Winch's suggested 7 steps out on your ILIASM spouse. It can't possibly hurt, and it will give you a real good idea of just how far down the chute your deal is.
It is as well to make the point again, that "normal" solutions are a pretty good thing for "normal" relationships and this blokes 7 steps are perfectly reasonable and sensible (and quite likely to work) in a "normal" jaded marriage.
ILIASM deals unfortunately are the very arse end of the dysfunctional marriage continuum and "normal" resolution measures have an abysmal success rate.
|
|
