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Post by tamara68 on Apr 7, 2018 15:10:29 GMT -5
Excellent video on dealing with a narcissist and why you are a perfect match for a narcissist.
I totally agree with this view and with the painful truth in it.
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Post by DryCreek on Apr 7, 2018 16:47:14 GMT -5
Haven't watched it all yet, but I like where he's going.
I believe we all own a role in our situations, whether it was in the selection, the tolerance (enabling?), or failing to remedy it. In the bigger picture, it's important to understand how we contributed to the recipe, or we're doomed to repeat it.
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Post by baza on Apr 7, 2018 19:16:26 GMT -5
I'm on my 4th read of a Mark Manson book - "The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fu*k" and his attitude is very similar to the bloke in the video.
To para-phrase his view....
The "narcissist" has a world view that they are smarter, cleverer and altogether wonderful and are therefore a special person entitled to special treatment.
The "patheticist" has a world view that fate has dealt them a hand worse than anyone else has to deal with, and are therefore a special person entitled to special treatment.
The two views are actually very very similar to each other.
At the core, is a belief that they are "special" and entitled to special treatment.
Truth is, that none of us are particularly "special"...except in our own heads.
And none of us is entitled to special treatment.
You are in an ILIASM shithole ?
That doesn't make you "special".
The way forward for you is the same as all the other non-special people.
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Post by TheGreatContender -aka Daddeeo on Apr 7, 2018 22:21:19 GMT -5
I have not watched the video but your statements resonate loudly. In my deal, I have been an enabler. There I said it. I was always tolerant of W's behavior. It was my way of showing love. Erroneous it was to believe that in hindaight. What I really should have been doing instead is remedying it. And this is where I failed. Metaphorically, we have long passed that remedy exit on the freeway unfortunately and it is so long passed that any u turn would be pointless. That notwithstanding, clarity and acknowledging one's role is helpful in the healing process. Haven't watched it all yet, but I like where he's going. I believe we all own a role in our situations, whether it was in the selection, the tolerance (enabling?), or failing to remedy it. In the bigger picture, it's important to understand how we contributed to the recipe, or we're doomed to repeat it. |
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