Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2018 12:22:26 GMT -5
Update: I’ve been through some really awful feelings lately, and sometimes feel like I don’t belong here anymore. Lately I’ve been missing the time in my life when the worst thing I had to worry about was being in a SM. I have a lot of anxiety lately.
But, I miss everybody. I don’t know how much I can contribute, but I want to lurk here on the site, and stay in touch.
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Post by h on Jan 3, 2018 12:59:43 GMT -5
Sorry to hear that you're having a rough time. You shouldn't ever have to worry about belonging here though. Lurk away all you like!
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Post by northstarmom on Jan 3, 2018 16:03:41 GMT -5
You belong here still, SK. All of us have concerns that go beyond being or having been in a SM.
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Post by misssunnybunny on Jan 3, 2018 17:44:50 GMT -5
Sorry you are having such anxiety. Life can really throw us some nasty crap, and it is tough to have to continually be strong. I don't do much more than lurk and post funny memes and sometimes songs, but I like to be here to stay in touch, and to maybe offer a little help and encouragement to others.
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Post by worksforme2 on Jan 3, 2018 19:18:50 GMT -5
I was saddened to read your last post. I had been wondering about your absence and I was hoping it was because the new guy you met and your writing were taking a lot of your time, and that your job necessitated more from you and that life in general was keeping you pretty busy.
2018 is the beginning of a new year. I am determined it is going to be a good year for me. With work and a bit of luck it will be a good one for you. You're past due for some good karma.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2018 22:33:34 GMT -5
The guy is still in the picture. I don’t know where this is going; but lately I feel too rattled to think about more than one day at a time with him. I have trouble concentrating on writing, but I’m still not giving up yet. As for work - I haven’t really felt the same about my company since finding out that they have no policy at all on bereavement leave....and I had to go into leave without pay to go to my mother’s funeral.
But, I am trying my best to stay in the present, take care of the things right in front of me, and take life one day at a time. Sooner or later, the horrible feelings are bound to stop. And like I said, I’m still interested in my friends here. I think that’s a good sign.
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Post by northstarmom on Jan 4, 2018 2:54:11 GMT -5
SK, your reactions sound normal considering you were coping with your mother’s illness for at least a year and now you have the grief of losing her. Your company sounds heartless. Is there a grief support group in your area you can attend? Continuing to use this as a place to vent also may help. We either have or will go through what you are going through. When my mom died almost 20 years ago was months after I didn’t get tenure. I became so depressed I could barely get out of bed and had a hard time deciding what to wear each day. Brushing my teeth often required too great an effort. Be gentle with yourself. Call in sick to give yourself more time to allow the raw pain to subside. It is an excruciatingly difficult passage to go through.
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