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Post by baza on Sept 28, 2017 18:57:45 GMT -5
Today, "scarring from ovarian cysts". Then, once the above is resolved (or shown to be bullshit) ... "endometriosis" might be the "why", until that resolves (or is shown to be bullshit) ... Then "Dysmenorrhoea" might be advanced as the reason' until that resolves (or is shown to be bullshit) ...
By now, as these things are played out, it is September 2020, and the supply of "whys" has barely been tapped, there will still be plenty to go.
It will be 2025 before you can blink.
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Post by h on Sept 29, 2017 4:32:30 GMT -5
Today, "scarring from ovarian cysts". Then, once the above is resolved (or shown to be bullshit) ... "endometriosis" might be the "why", until that resolves (or is shown to be bullshit) ... Then "Dysmenorrhoea" might be advanced as the reason' until that resolves (or is shown to be bullshit) ... By now, as these things are played out, it is September 2020, and the supply of "whys" has barely been tapped, there will still be plenty to go. It will be 2025 before you can blink. That timeline is shorter than you think. I'm back dating the year to start when her surgery took place. She can't come up with any new excuses if she doesn't start trying to have a sex life. Any further excuse would require her to first try to work on sex and find out if there's a problem. I honestly don't expect her to try. I'm only waiting so I have a solid reason for my family. If I left too soon, I would burn many relationships with my own family. Saving up cash now for lawyer fees when shtf.
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Post by workingonit on Nov 4, 2017 20:39:46 GMT -5
h so this whole thread is already a few months old but I just wanted to echo what a few have said. I am a nurse practitioner. I also have ovarian cysts and pretty bad endometriosis as well as uterine fibroids. I absolutely have days when the pain is awful and all activities would be a no go. Like 2 days a month. I have also had multiple surgeries and have lots of scarring. In general I still masturbbate 2-3 times a week. Even the day after a severe painful day I will be ready to go. In fact I have a theory that there is so much increased blood flow to the whole area at those times that as soon as the pain passes I am unbearably aroused. Also, as you know, intimacy could also be achieved other ways if actual PIV were not possible. Just wanted you to have another female and health care provider weigh in on the health stuff.
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Post by hopingforachange on Nov 4, 2017 21:09:47 GMT -5
h so this whole thread is already a few months old but I just wanted to echo what a few have said. I am a nurse practitioner. I also have ovarian cysts and pretty bad endometriosis as well as uterine fibroids. I absolutely have days when the pain is awful and all activities would be a no go. Like 2 days a month. I have also had multiple surgeries and have lots of scarring. In general I still masturbbate 2-3 times a week. Even the day after a severe painful day I will be ready to go. In fact I have a theory that there is so much increased blood flow to the whole area at those times that as soon as the pain passes I am unbearably aroused. Also, as you know, intimacy could also be achieved other ways if actual PIV were not possible. Just wanted you to have another female and health care provider weigh in on the health stuff. I had an ex with endometriosis and ovarian cysts (she eventually had a hysterectomy) but she found that sex of all things made her pain better. Now, the piv sex hurt and added a little bit to her pain, but when your already at 8 of 10, what's 8.5 for a few minutes. Then afterwords, her mind got the wonderful feel good chemical dump and while the pain was still there, her mind could ignore it and she could live a normal life for a few hours.
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Post by h on Nov 4, 2017 21:49:41 GMT -5
h so this whole thread is already a few months old but I just wanted to echo what a few have said. I am a nurse practitioner. I also have ovarian cysts and pretty bad endometriosis as well as uterine fibroids. I absolutely have days when the pain is awful and all activities would be a no go. Like 2 days a month. I have also had multiple surgeries and have lots of scarring. In general I still masturbbate 2-3 times a week. Even the day after a severe painful day I will be ready to go. In fact I have a theory that there is so much increased blood flow to the whole area at those times that as soon as the pain passes I am unbearably aroused. Also, as you know, intimacy could also be achieved other ways if actual PIV were not possible. Just wanted you to have another female and health care provider weigh in on the health stuff. I'm well aware that her medical issues did not prevent alternative intimate activities. I really do appreciate your confirmation of my suspicions though. I think the real issue is that my W isn't interested in sex and has been lining up one excuse after another to avoid it. If she wanted to have a sex life, she would have done something years ago to fix it. I'm done taking the excuses.
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Post by james on Nov 6, 2017 4:12:08 GMT -5
dazednconfused
Didn't see your original post as have also joined recently myself. Interesting to me that you and dinnaken both mention the age 58. That is the oldest age that I (now 52) am prepared to reach whilst still in my SM- barring some miraculous turnaround on the part of my wife.
I think that one of the values of this forum is that it presents you with alternative courses of action that real, thinking, rational people have followed and therefore validated. It reminds me of the moment when I read The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins, about 10 years ago. Up to that point, I had been religious, though never completely happy about it. When I read that book, I had the realisation that it was totally ok for some people not to be religious and this was a life-changer for me- I never looked back. The impetus to jettison religion came from within myself, no-one said to me: "this is what I think you should do". Similarly with SM, I think. People can present you with alternatives, give advice etc etc- but no-one can tell you what to do. That decision has to come from within yourself. It's maybe harder to make the decision to leave (religion or SM) than it is to stay, because leaving involves a lot more unknowns. Presumably that's why staying is the easier default option that people on this site spend a lot of time trying to talk other people on this site out of. I suggest you read the as many stories on this site as possible, then make a list of all of your options (it's not a very long list) and consider each one very carefully. Good luck to you!
BTW I do not want to turn this thread into a debate about religion, which I am sure is banned anyway. I am sure there are plenty of religious people on this site and good luck to you all. It just seems like a situation with parallels to SM.
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