Define The Present State Of Your Primary Relationship
Jun 30, 2017 2:08:59 GMT -5
hopingforachange, WindSister, and 1 more like this
Post by baza on Jun 30, 2017 2:08:59 GMT -5
Marriage – Definition at the start.
Two individuals contributing to the common partnership in financial, emotional, parental, domestic responsibilities and sexual terms.
Now let us assume that one of the partners chooses to alter the position. Let's say by adopting a policy of wildly overspending, or withholding sex, or being an indifferent parent, or withdrawing emotionally, or abandoning domestic responsibilities.
The Definition at the start now no longer applies. It is not a marriage any more, it is something else.
It might be a financial partnership now.
Or perhaps it might now be a co-parenting set up.
Or maybe a roommate situation.
Or maybe a pretty rotten roommate situation.
But it is certainly not a marriage anymore, and there is not much point in pretending otherwise, either to yourself, each other, or the outside world.
You really need to take a good hard look at your situation, and recognise what you actually have now as your primary relationship.
You might be quite okay with now having just a financial partnership, or a co-parenting situation, or a roommate situation.
Or you might not be happy with it at all.
In any event, the marriage – as it was originally defined by you – is no more.
It is gone, altered fundamentally leaving a new situation in its’ place.
So what is *your* present situation in regard to your primary relationship ?
Are you ok with that ?
Is there enough of the original structure left to offset the loss of other components in the primary relationship ?
If you are not ok with it, can a case be made to formalise the fact that the marriage is over ?
Two individuals contributing to the common partnership in financial, emotional, parental, domestic responsibilities and sexual terms.
Now let us assume that one of the partners chooses to alter the position. Let's say by adopting a policy of wildly overspending, or withholding sex, or being an indifferent parent, or withdrawing emotionally, or abandoning domestic responsibilities.
The Definition at the start now no longer applies. It is not a marriage any more, it is something else.
It might be a financial partnership now.
Or perhaps it might now be a co-parenting set up.
Or maybe a roommate situation.
Or maybe a pretty rotten roommate situation.
But it is certainly not a marriage anymore, and there is not much point in pretending otherwise, either to yourself, each other, or the outside world.
You really need to take a good hard look at your situation, and recognise what you actually have now as your primary relationship.
You might be quite okay with now having just a financial partnership, or a co-parenting situation, or a roommate situation.
Or you might not be happy with it at all.
In any event, the marriage – as it was originally defined by you – is no more.
It is gone, altered fundamentally leaving a new situation in its’ place.
So what is *your* present situation in regard to your primary relationship ?
Are you ok with that ?
Is there enough of the original structure left to offset the loss of other components in the primary relationship ?
If you are not ok with it, can a case be made to formalise the fact that the marriage is over ?
