rev316
New Member
Married
Posts: 10 
Age Range: 56-60
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Meh
Jul 4, 2017 16:56:55 GMT -5
Post by rev316 on Jul 4, 2017 16:56:55 GMT -5
Appears that you bring a number of things to the marital table that your missus values. Money and lifestyle. And she embraces those things with enthusiasm. Appears that you also bring other things to the marital table that she couldn't give a fuck about. A desire for a robust sexual component to the deal and for the deal to be a genuine partnership. And she ignores those things with equal unenthusiasm. What is she bringing to the table - apart from an ability to produce artery clogging food ? All good questions, and the sort that have to be asked and answered after a few years of marriage. In our case, we just celebrated our 9th anniversary. Second marriage for us both, and we'd known and dated each other for 4 years before getting hitched. Had been single for many years before. We enjoyed each other's company, shared many of the same values, and were intellectually equal despite having widely different upbringings and social backgrounds. She had a very unique and interesting job and I had a wide range of interests. Now, we're more like good friends or buddies than a starstruck IN LOVE couple. I care for her, and there are lots of things to take care of...at times I think I've married a walking Jerry Springer Show because of her family. No, we don't talk deeply. In fact, we can go hours while driving without talking about anything, save "Look out for that car." There's not only no passion in our lovelife, there's damned little in our lives generally. Unlike Thoreau's mass of men, I feel like I'm not only living a life of quiet desperation, but one of discontent as well. |
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Post by baza on Jul 5, 2017 3:41:48 GMT -5
OK, well taking that as read, what - if anything - are you prepared to do about the core problem Brother rev316 ? There's a sort of a hint that you might have a look at the cheating option. That's a perfectly valid choice, but getting a 3rd party involved when the partnership is in dysfunction sure can cause things to fly off at some crazy tangents - many of which end up in collapsing the primary relationship. Seeing a lawyer in your jurisdiction to establish how a divorce would shake out for you would at least give you a heads up as to what the stakes are in the cheating option. This information would also be of value should your "meh" turn in to "fuck this" and move you toward divorce as a stand alone option, so it is probably a good idea to check out in the pretty near future. Having the information commits you to precisely nothing. It is merely researching options so when the time comes, you can be somewhat prepared. |
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Post by snowman12345 on Jul 5, 2017 6:37:31 GMT -5
It sounds to me that settling into the retired life just doesn't suit you.
Can you expand the consulting to include trips abroad?
Would going away and then coming back spark some interest on either of your parts?
Getting "off the farm" sometimes brings opportunities you can't get shoveling manure. I, myself, am retired and don't need to work, but I am going back to work because I "need" to work. |
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Meh
Jul 5, 2017 6:39:30 GMT -5
via mobile
beachguy likes this
Post by northstarmom on Jul 5, 2017 6:39:30 GMT -5
The marriage sounds unappealing. Why are you staying?
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Meh
Jul 5, 2017 8:14:55 GMT -5
Post by twotimesone on Jul 5, 2017 8:14:55 GMT -5
My wife is too lazy to cook. No sex, even starfish sex, complains when I get angry or raise my voice, badmouths me in front of my kids. Gees, if I were you maybe I would talk with the wife but I would've stayed...
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rev316
New Member
Married
Posts: 10
Age Range: 56-60
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Meh
Jul 5, 2017 20:59:42 GMT -5
Post by rev316 on Jul 5, 2017 20:59:42 GMT -5
My wife is too lazy to cook. No sex, even starfish sex, complains when I get angry or raise my voice, badmouths me in front of my kids. Gees, if I were you maybe I would talk with the wife but I would've stayed... Yeah, I get the "I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet" thing and the deplorable situations that many others face. And perhaps one reason I'm here is to roll around in schadenfreude. Nope, not really. I'm truly looking for ways of making things better...having perhaps stepped back from Meh a bit. Thanks for your comments. |
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