Whiny neutered goats fly
Jun 16, 2017 11:16:24 GMT -5
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GeekGoddess, lwoetin, and 1 more like this
Post by Chatter Fox on Jun 16, 2017 11:16:24 GMT -5
I just learned this today and I wanted to share...
Whiny neutered goats fly
It's an acronym (WNGF) for the 4 things that make games fun and addictive. If you are playing a game and its frustrating, then chances are that the game is missing one or more of the 4 letters. So what are the 4 things? Well... for a game to be fun and addicting it must be...
1. W - Winnable. No one likes to play a game they can't win.
2. N - Novel, the game must present new and novel challenges in order to keep your interest alive
3. G - goals, the game needs to have goals for you to reach
4. F - feedback, the game needs to give feedback in regards to your performance.
So what does any of this have to do with a SM? Well, the book im reading is suggesting that I try to see frustrating aspects of my life as a game. I'm not a fan of referring to aspects of my relationship as a "game". It just sounds shallow and kind of like I'm playing head games with her. I'm willing to try anything though so maybe seeing it as a game would help me? I don't know. Anyway, the book is suggesting that i use the acronym WNGF to create a new perspective. If I can make this feel like a game that I genuinely want to play, then I may be able to cope much better with the situation.
My take on this is that the rules of the game are very flexible and are very much tied to the chosen goals. For example, one "game" i can envision involves the goal of having satisfying sex with my wife once a week. On the other extreme, I could concoct a "game" where my goal is to be faithful yet celibate until the day I die. Both games have truly different goals in mind and therefore would have different strategies to meeting the goals. There are infinite other goals. A goal of a game could be leaving your marriage. The goals can be smaller too. It could be to simply be more able to stand up for yourself and become more assertive with your spouse. It could be to get an education and a job so you feel more capable of standing on your own 2 feet in the event that you do want to leave. Whatever you want to improve upon or change but struggle to feel motivated to do can be reframed as a game. You can form the structure and rules of the game with WNGF in mind to make it fun and addictive (hopefully). That's the idea of it at least.
I'm not sure what to do with this concept yet. It's funny though because I can see how my SM absolutely does NOT have the WNGF thing going on. So no wonder it's frustrating. It doesn't seem winnable, it doesn't offer new challenges or novelty, and I get very little feedback. My goal has been to have mutually enjoyable sex with my wife on a regular basis. Maybe that goal is just not winnable in the long run? So maybe, of things keep going downhill for me, I should change the game. I'm just not sure what game I want to play. So I have a lot of thinking to do.
Whiny neutered goats fly
It's an acronym (WNGF) for the 4 things that make games fun and addictive. If you are playing a game and its frustrating, then chances are that the game is missing one or more of the 4 letters. So what are the 4 things? Well... for a game to be fun and addicting it must be...
1. W - Winnable. No one likes to play a game they can't win.
2. N - Novel, the game must present new and novel challenges in order to keep your interest alive
3. G - goals, the game needs to have goals for you to reach
4. F - feedback, the game needs to give feedback in regards to your performance.
So what does any of this have to do with a SM? Well, the book im reading is suggesting that I try to see frustrating aspects of my life as a game. I'm not a fan of referring to aspects of my relationship as a "game". It just sounds shallow and kind of like I'm playing head games with her. I'm willing to try anything though so maybe seeing it as a game would help me? I don't know. Anyway, the book is suggesting that i use the acronym WNGF to create a new perspective. If I can make this feel like a game that I genuinely want to play, then I may be able to cope much better with the situation.
My take on this is that the rules of the game are very flexible and are very much tied to the chosen goals. For example, one "game" i can envision involves the goal of having satisfying sex with my wife once a week. On the other extreme, I could concoct a "game" where my goal is to be faithful yet celibate until the day I die. Both games have truly different goals in mind and therefore would have different strategies to meeting the goals. There are infinite other goals. A goal of a game could be leaving your marriage. The goals can be smaller too. It could be to simply be more able to stand up for yourself and become more assertive with your spouse. It could be to get an education and a job so you feel more capable of standing on your own 2 feet in the event that you do want to leave. Whatever you want to improve upon or change but struggle to feel motivated to do can be reframed as a game. You can form the structure and rules of the game with WNGF in mind to make it fun and addictive (hopefully). That's the idea of it at least.
I'm not sure what to do with this concept yet. It's funny though because I can see how my SM absolutely does NOT have the WNGF thing going on. So no wonder it's frustrating. It doesn't seem winnable, it doesn't offer new challenges or novelty, and I get very little feedback. My goal has been to have mutually enjoyable sex with my wife on a regular basis. Maybe that goal is just not winnable in the long run? So maybe, of things keep going downhill for me, I should change the game. I'm just not sure what game I want to play. So I have a lot of thinking to do.
