Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2017 21:46:55 GMT -5
smartkat,
For me it's not about a serene mountain top. You have to realize why you've chosen to stay in a crappy relationship and take emotional abuse. Then you change it. If you don't then you're going to repeat the same mistakes again. It easy to go through life just repeating the same bad habits.
I think it's a mistake to try find happiness in meditation or have a fantasy about a blissful life. You're going to be sick, people are going to treat you wrong, and there will always be some kind of trouble. I train myself to accept this but not allow it to impact my life. These are things that I can not control. I can only control how I react to them. I stopped nagging the wife because I can't change her. She has to want it. She was in a shitty mood today and I just ignored it. Usually it would have pissed me off or brought me down. No more, and you know what she straightened up on her own. She is having to deal with a lot of her own problems. She's got to learn a healthy approach to life.
I feared leaving and being alone. Hell, I still have a great fear of being alone if I leave. But I'm no longer choosing to live under fear.
For me it's not about a serene mountain top. You have to realize why you've chosen to stay in a crappy relationship and take emotional abuse. Then you change it. If you don't then you're going to repeat the same mistakes again. It easy to go through life just repeating the same bad habits.
I think it's a mistake to try find happiness in meditation or have a fantasy about a blissful life. You're going to be sick, people are going to treat you wrong, and there will always be some kind of trouble. I train myself to accept this but not allow it to impact my life. These are things that I can not control. I can only control how I react to them. I stopped nagging the wife because I can't change her. She has to want it. She was in a shitty mood today and I just ignored it. Usually it would have pissed me off or brought me down. No more, and you know what she straightened up on her own. She is having to deal with a lot of her own problems. She's got to learn a healthy approach to life.
I feared leaving and being alone. Hell, I still have a great fear of being alone if I leave. But I'm no longer choosing to live under fear.
