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Post by McRoomMate on Jan 21, 2017 16:39:12 GMT -5
lakeside4003 Respect for your efforts and actions . . . Right now - my marriage is just a zombie shell - she never even touches me or tries to touch me. And me neither towards her. It has been like this for many years. Frankly I do not even have the will to try and fix this - how can we be a normal couple again with deep love and affection. I am sorry but I just cannot "manufacture" and be an "actor" performing in my life. I would feel forced into this like a disciplined and punishment to have to "FAKE" caring about her at this point - at least physically - I do care for her and wish her happiness and fulfillment. But for this kind of thing, it has to come from the Heart and be sincere - at this point I would only be acting and following orders because deep down inside I have ZERO desire to even touch her ever again!
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Post by lakeside4003 on Jan 21, 2017 18:50:51 GMT -5
hey all, finally got some response via an email, essentially darvo in classic form, but of course with veins of truth...
she didn't reply at all to the core topic of SM, avoidance, the link I had sent to our therapist - or the negative energy of all that, but rather chose to suggest that 'i'm not challenging myself about my frustrations & where they come from'. (clearly she's not involved here, it must be from my childhood, (which was quite nice and normal))...
funny (not) how she's still avoiding the core topic, but now I know to anticipate this, passing into the 'I'm gonna move forward, instead of hoping, or following logic that this shouldn't really be like this.'
it sucks to have to give up rational hope...
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