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Post by tamara68 on Dec 8, 2016 15:13:42 GMT -5
I am tired.
Stbx has just sent me 9 emails in a row. About a load of things he wants from me. Money of course. I need to pay all his bills and I need to give money for some things he wants for the house. Still in denial that he will need to move out at a certain point. He has ordered clothes via internet on my name and he demands that I pay for it. And so on and so forth. He is still considering to prosecute me.
One of his emails had a long list of all my horrible behavior.I am an awful wife. And it is criminal that I leave him without money.
16 December court will take a look at the matter to decide about financial issues and about where my daughter will live for the time being . It is very well possible that court postpones it to a later date.
I am stressed and sad but it is good that something is happening and that court is going to decide something.
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Post by beachguy on Dec 8, 2016 16:17:45 GMT -5
I always found my STBX to be very selfish. As the marriage crumbled and it became clear we were separating it just magnified 100x. At some point I realized I was not dealing with a wife, I was dealing with a spoiled selfish miserable 5 year old screaming "I hate you!" With her hand out for every cent and looking to me for everything else she needed.
This no fun at all. My heart goes out to you.
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Post by baza on Dec 8, 2016 21:10:22 GMT -5
You hold the whip hand here at the moment Sister tamara, you have the purse strings.
That, is about the best possible leverage to have to force this to resolution.
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The sooner this gets resolved, the sooner he gets his right whack of the money. So, it is in HIS best longer term best interests (short term too) to come to an agreement (or have a legal agreement forced on him) to put an end to the deal, take his rightful share, and fuck off.
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If you bankroll him in the interim, his incentive to assist in the resolution of the matter is gone, and it drags on and on.
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PS - if some internet company has been stupid enough to extend him credit, that's their (and his) problem, not yours.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 9, 2016 14:00:09 GMT -5
What an ass.
If I were you, I wouldn't give him any money directly. If there's something your daughter needs, buy it for her and give it to her.
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Post by obobfla on Dec 9, 2016 22:16:55 GMT -5
What an ass. If I were you, I wouldn't give him any money directly. If there's something your daughter needs, buy it for her and give it to her. What Smartkat said. Not sure of the laws in your country, but definitely separate yourself financially from him ASAP. Don't listen to your husband. Listen to your lawyer. |
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Post by tamara68 on Dec 11, 2016 5:26:49 GMT -5
I always found my STBX to be very selfish. As the marriage crumbled and it became clear we were separating it just magnified 100x. At some point I realized I was not dealing with a wife, I was dealing with a spoiled selfish miserable 5 year old screaming "I hate you!" With her hand out for every cent and looking to me for everything else she needed. This no fun at all. My heart goes out to you. Thank you. |
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Post by tamara68 on Dec 11, 2016 5:32:19 GMT -5
You hold the whip hand here at the moment Sister tamara, you have the purse strings. That, is about the best possible leverage to have to force this to resolution. - The sooner this gets resolved, the sooner he gets his right whack of the money. So, it is in HIS best longer term best interests (short term too) to come to an agreement (or have a legal agreement forced on him) to put an end to the deal, take his rightful share, and fuck off. - If you bankroll him in the interim, his incentive to assist in the resolution of the matter is gone, and it drags on and on. - - PS - if some internet company has been stupid enough to extend him credit, that's their (and his) problem, not yours. I don't pay, but it is hard. I will be happy when things get resolved. The postorder companies maybe his problem, but mine too. Half of what he bought was for my daughter. But he didn't discuss it with me first. And he rejected my offer to let me and her go shopping together. I gave her a coupon for clothes, so she can have everything she needs if he would allow it. The accounts for the internet companies were on my name, that is or could be - a problem too. I have no longer access to them but my name is on it. |
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Post by tamara68 on Dec 11, 2016 5:33:51 GMT -5
What an ass. If I were you, I wouldn't give him any money directly. If there's something your daughter needs, buy it for her and give it to her. That is right. I don't give him money directly apart from a small amount per month. I have given a few things directly, but they didn't open the door for me when I brought it... |
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Post by tamara68 on Dec 11, 2016 5:37:17 GMT -5
What an ass. If I were you, I wouldn't give him any money directly. If there's something your daughter needs, buy it for her and give it to her. What Smartkat said. Not sure of the laws in your country, but definitely separate yourself financially from him ASAP. Don't listen to your husband. Listen to your lawyer. Hopefully there will soon be some arrangement on this issues. I listen to my lawyer. But it isn't easy to block out my husbands words. He even wrote that I am making a battle out of this... moron |
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 11, 2016 7:30:51 GMT -5
'If you're going through hell, keep going.' (Winston Churchill) Tamara, I think you are such a badass. Your situation is extremely difficult, but you're GETTING IT DONE, and I admire you so much for that. KEEP GOING!!!
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Post by tamara68 on Dec 11, 2016 7:43:11 GMT -5
'If you're going through hell, keep going.' (Winston Churchill) Tamara, I think you are such a badass. Your situation is extremely difficult, but you're GETTING IT DONE, and I admire you so much for that. KEEP GOING!!! thank you! That is what I am trying to do. I try to take one step at the time. Nothing can be worse that what lies behind me. (I hope.) |
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Post by nancyb on Dec 11, 2016 9:20:55 GMT -5
'If you're going through hell, keep going.' (Winston Churchill) Tamara, I think you are such a badass. Your situation is extremely difficult, but you're GETTING IT DONE, and I admire you so much for that. KEEP GOING!!! thank you! That is what I am trying to do. I try to take one step at the time. Nothing can be worse that what lies behind me. (I hope.) Truer words have ever been spoke. Keep your eyes looking forward. You have been through the ringer and will come out of this stronger and even more amazing.  |
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Post by becca on Dec 11, 2016 10:06:21 GMT -5
'If you're going through hell, keep going.' (Winston Churchill) Tamara, I think you are such a badass. Your situation is extremely difficult, but you're GETTING IT DONE, and I admire you so much for that. KEEP GOING!!! I agree with TBK, you are tough as nails and this too shall pass. The Winston Churchill made me think of this country song. I am attaching some of the lyrics for those that are country music averse! If you're goin' through hell keep on going Don't slow down if you're scared don't show it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there I've been deep down in that darkness I've been down to my last match Felt a hundred different demons breathin' fire down my back And I knew that if I stumbled I'd fall right into the trap That they were layin' But the good news is there's angels everywhere out on the street Holdin' out a hand to pull you back up on your feet The one's that you've been draggin' for so long You're on your knees might as well be prayin' Guess what I'm sayin' If you're goin' through hell keep on going Don't slow down if you're scared don't show it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there When you're goin' through hell keep on movin' Face that fire walk right through it You might get out before the devil even knows you're there |
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Post by obobfla on Dec 11, 2016 10:27:52 GMT -5
What Smartkat said. Not sure of the laws in your country, but definitely separate yourself financially from him ASAP. Don't listen to your husband. Listen to your lawyer. Hopefully there will soon be some arrangement on this issues. I listen to my lawyer. But it isn't easy to block out my husbands words. He even wrote that I am making a battle out of this... moron My wife is a much sweeter person than your husband. But I constantly have to remind myself that what she sees as real is not what I or most of the rest of the world see as real. Your husband is so sick that he cannot picture anything outside his small selfish world. Therefore, anything he says about you has very little credibility. |
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