mip
New Member
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Post by mip on Oct 11, 2016 1:29:50 GMT -5
Im new to this forum. But so far, what little I read I can relate to. I have been living it for a couple of years. I Knew something was seriously wrong with my marriage when I couldnt even ask my wife a simple question without her either getting angry , like I was bothering her or her not answering my question at all. At first I got really angry , then over time, I got quiet and now Im numb and ready to move on in my life. I believe life is too short to be miserable with someone who is there for reasons other than love. So it's not only the sex or lack of it but the "other" stuff that make you feel alone even though someone is right next to you.
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Post by bballgirl on Oct 11, 2016 7:26:26 GMT -5
That's so true. It is the other stuff. I would ask my husband if I could tell him a joke, just to be playful, he would say NO.
Of course when he needed to tell me something I better be listening, giving my full attention and no eye rolling.
Of course that usually led to getting yelled at for rolling my eyes or not giving him my full attention.
I got out this year. I'm a lot happier.
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Post by GeekGoddess on Oct 11, 2016 9:24:04 GMT -5
Welcome, mip. It was that same day to day grind leading to my numbness that made it feel like I was killing my spirit if I were to have stayed longer. The sexlessness is a symptom, an expression, of what else is wrong in the relationship. I felt very degraded by accepting the treatment doled out to me. I had disappointed MYSELF and that's a horrible feeling. I hope you'll find what you need in this forum - it is a great group of folks that, despite our different details, understand what that feels like.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Oct 11, 2016 14:06:21 GMT -5
Yes - one thing most people here will tell you is that it's rarely just about the sex.
I realized later that my refuser had withdrawn from me emotionally in some ways - as well as stopping the sex.
He had built up a wall, and he wasn't letting me in.
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